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I feel like I'm being left behind

Hi all

Warning: Rant coming up...!

I know this is going to sound terribly mean, but why oh why did TWO of my friends have to tell me they're pregnant on the same day?! My best mate told me first thing this morning by sending me her 12 week scan picture. We are the same age (37 - eeek), and both started ttc at about the same time (me in June 08, her in Aug 08). She got pregnant that month (!) and had a gorgeous son in April 09, while there was absolutely zilch from me. Then I finally got pg in June after a year of ttc only to mc 11 weeks later. Now, she's pg again, and has told me to "hurry up"!!! Doh, I'm trying!

Then another friend called to say she is expecting twins... can it get any worse?! :\?

I'm obviously utterly delighted for them both, however finding out once is bad enough, but twice in a day?!?!

Does it make me a bad person to feel sightly jealous though?!

Right, rant over... Thanks for listening. I feel better for that :lol:

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that AF got me today too, just to remind me that I'm def not pg this month.

Lynn x

[Modified by: LJ09 on 26 January 2010 00:09:01 ]

Replies

  • LJ09 you are not a bad person! I am convinced that everyone on this forum page would feel exactly the same as you! I started tryin in Oct 08 and since then over 20 friends and work colleagues have fallen pg many after only a month or two of trying. I finally fell pregnant in Nov 09 and then had a mmc at 12 weeks. Yesterday my best friend had her baby daughter. She only started trying because I had had problems and obviously conceived in the 2nd month. I feel delighted for her but disappointed at the same time. I have a friend at work who found out she was pg a week after me and we were both sooo excited to be sharing our pg together. It has been really hard the last couple of weeks and she has her 12 week scan this week. I hope everything is fine for her but so disappointed I wont be sharing her pg with her anymore.

    Feel free to rant we are or have been in the same place!

    xx
  • Thanks Muffin. I'm not especially prone to ranting, but it's good to vent every now and then. It must be especially difficult for you seeing your friend every day when you should've been going through it together. That must really hurt, and I'm sorry for that.

    I hope things works out for you soon x x x
  • Lynn

    Im really sorry your feeling so fed up with it all.

    Dont worry I felt exactly the same the other day & felt awful but it's just one of those things your not a mean person because of it hun.

    It is disapointing when everyone around you seems to be easily conceiving especially when they dont understand what youve been/going through & then for AF to arrive is just a pisstake really!!!
    It's always good to have a good rant & you soon feel a bit better afterwards for it hun.

    You will have a baby hun & as you'll be at different stages to your friends it will be all the more special & exciting there news will be old hat & everyone will be excited & pleased for you. xxxx
  • Lynn

    Im really sorry your feeling so fed up with it all.

    Dont worry I felt exactly the same the other day & felt awful but it's just one of those things your not a mean person because of it hun.

    It is disapointing when everyone around you seems to be easily conceiving especially when they dont understand what youve been/going through & then for AF to arrive is just a pisstake really!!!
    It's always good to have a good rant & you soon feel a bit better afterwards for it hun.

    You will have a baby hun & as you'll be at different stages to your friends it will be all the more special & exciting there news will be old hat & everyone will be excited & pleased for you. xxxx
  • You're not a bad person hun, we all know that feeling!

    I started to miscarry over xmas (great timing!) and in the middle of it one of my friends sent me a text also of her scan picture, announcing her pregnancy. I was gutted, but she didn't know what I was going though and I know she would never intentionally upset us. But it hurt and yes I felt bitter and angry and 'why not me?', bit ashamed to say that but as another friend of mine said, I am only human.

    Go easy on yourself hun, your time WILL come xxx
  • Aww honey I'm not surprised you needed to vent. It gets to us all at one time or another. Feel free to rant as much as you like to us!

    It's hard not to count the months that pass and feel upset that you are no further forward with the old ttc'ing. I find that I feel like I am just waiting, waiting, and sometimes not enjoying my life for what I have NOW, but wishing time away so that we can have our little baby.

    Not sure why I told you that really, think what I'm trying to say is, I bet we all feel left behind to some degree or another, so don't feel like you're a bad person!
  • Oh hun, you're not a bad person at all. It's totally natural to feel that way!

    I have 3 friends who are due in July and I would have been due at the beginning of Aug. I can't help comparing where they are up to to where I would've been. I hate to admit it but I do feel jealous! Especially of my best friend in particular as she seems to have no consideration (eg reading pg mags in front of me). Now, I'm not an opinionated person really (or at least I try to keep them to myself) but I just want to scream when I hear of her eating things like pate or blue cheeses or having steaming baths because 'it's all a myth'...I know it's each to their own but I just feel like it's so unfair when I was doing everything by the book! I am genuinely delighted for them at the same time tho.

    Ok, so I've also turned my reply into a rant but it's good to get these things out! You can't help how you feel hun. Just go with it and know that those people are already part way thru their journey and you have all that excitement and good times to come!

    Also, I believe that we'll all have a lot more fun when it does happen because I think we are fully aware of what is happening and what a miracle pg is. So rather than getting down about morning sickness etc I think we will cherish every moment!

    Try to stay positive if you can.

    xxx
  • I've only just managed to log on, and I have to say a massive thanks to you all. Each and every one of you has made me feel sooooo much better. (((((((((hugs)))))))))))

    Absolutely loving your reciprocated rant Lucky Mummy, actually made me laugh out loud. My DH is looking at me like I've completely lost the plot! No change there then image

    So CD2 today, only a week until we start bd-ing again, and this time with refreshed PMA. Thank you!!! You're all very kind.
  • YAYY glad to see the PMA is back in the building hun. Feeling really positive, surely we must be going back in the same due in forum!! xxx
  • Oh, I can only hope Laujai! When is your next test date? Mine should be around the 19th Feb, which doesn't seem that far away really. I have to be very grateful for fairly short, regular cycles... at least I know what I'm supposed to be doing when (in theory!) Good luck to you x
  • Just a few days after me then, im testing 14th or 15th Feb & gona try not to early test but well see how that pans out nearer the time LOL!!!

    Good Luck
    xxx
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