new job but really want to start trying...

HI , just as it says really. I am a teacher and have started a new job in January. We had already decided that our TTC date would be June 2010 but we have discussed starting earlier but if we were lucky enough to fall pg. in the first month or two my worry would be telling work!
Anyone been in same situation or any advice? Does a couple of months make much difference?

Posts

  • hey g/c from pregnancy- if you see my other topics you'll see I havent told my work yet and I'm scared to lol- I started in August and feel pg in October- I'm now 15+4 weeks and planning to tell them after my 20 week scan- tehnically they're not allowed to have a reaction either way but I do feel guilty- I didnt think I'd fall so quick (though definately over the moon!!) I know I havent really helped but I'm kinda in the same boat x
  • I know what you mean about guilt. I feel awful just thinking about telling my boss I am preg. I so want to start trying now but this is holding me back! My OH wants to start trying next month and I would love to as well and I know that it is highly unlikly I would be lucky enough to become preg. right away but the guilt of telling work keeps spinning around in my head!
  • I think I just decided I didnt know how long it would take so didnt want to put my life on hold- you might be lucky and fall quick but if it takes a while you might get frustrated that you held off- I think our child bearing years are short in comparison with our working life that will always be there- I think if there's such a thing as reincarnation I'm coming back a man- they have it so easy- their bosses arent fussed either way lol x
  • Hi michmummy - I'm sure you have to tell your employers before you are 15 weeks gone. Have you read ur employee handbook? May be different elsewhere but thats what i have read on direct.gov and thats the rules at my workplace.

    Hi MrsMel - I cant imagine any employer being 'over the moon' if you did conceive early but at the end of the day they cannot show any resentment either. Check out direct.gov to find out your rights as an employee and recheck ur contract so there are no loopholes!
  • mrsallen08- the wording is very confusing but its actually "by the 15th week before your baby is due" same goes for maternity leave entitlement - you need to be employed for 26 weeks by the 15th week before your baby is due- ie 1 week before your LMP before BFP. They dont word it well hence the confusion so technically I dont have to tell my employer til 25 weeks (planning to do it after the 20 week anomoly scan) and as for an employee handbook lol unfortunately I dont actually even have a written contract as yet (very small owner managed company)
  • Oh sorry michmummy2b! I completely misunderstood that! I feel a bit stupid now. Will your boss be okay with you? I'd be abit worried if I didnt have a written contract but I suppose it depends on your situation, i dont want to put you off anymore!
  • dont worry at all mrsallen08 - its so badly worded!! I work in a small ( but busy and successful) accounts practice literally one owner and 3 staff members- I have my offer letter which states terms salary and start date etc (even when you dont have a written contract you still have a contract and all the basic rights of any employee) I hope my employer will be ok (if not a bit surprised/dissapointed) he has 4 children is a real family man and church going so think he has strong family values- just feel bad for falling so quickly into a new position- I dont think its wrong to wait til the 20 week scan as that's where all major anomolies are picked up and /i can tell him I wanted complete peace of mind that everything was ok............ahhhhh lol x
  • well I was already pregnant when I started my job - not intentionally, i was made redundant and had no choice but to look for a job, but everyone was wonderful to me, my maternity cover was great and i've been back at work for 4 months and no one bats an eyelid that i can't stay late or have gone part time. There's never an 'ideal' time so I think you just have to go for it, . the only thing that might influence your decision perhaps is money - some companies offer enhanced maternity pay for longer service. I was never entitled to SMP so I didn't feel guilty with my employer and I used my keeping in touch days to do a few days work while I was off
  • I started my new job pregnant, although I didn't know. My employer has been fab, I've found it much easier to get all the time off for my appointments and when I've been feeling crappy. Im not entitled to SMP so don't feel guilty either. We weren't going to try until this year however I agree with happy'sm2be, we were waiting for the right time but came to the conclusion there wasn't one. We were also lucky enough to fall in the first month.
    Good luck with whatever you decide to do image
    Ally 15 weeks today xx
  • I have all of these worries as well - I am on a fixed term contract that finishes in August so at that point I need to find a new job (easier said than done) and then work there for long enough to get SMP and then ttc.... all of this delays our ttc attempts which I would really rather be doing right now!

    I think it is natural to feel an element of guilt telling your employer but I am hoping that the unbridled joy will swamp those feelings image I think I will find it harder as I am planning on becoming a SAHM and probably not got going back so once I have a bfp that's it for a good few years.

    I just think about it the other way though - my hubby will still have a good job and pay plenty of taxes so that's taken care of, I will go back to work once kiddies at school, and in a working life of 40-odd years, taking a couple of years out to have kids is not the end of the world.

    Cent
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