Stuck in limbo...

Im due to start ttc from 1st July, having decided to start then in November so the date has been set for 7months. The problem is that im less than 3weeks away from ttc and should be getting excited but i dont actually know how to feel. :\?

At my work there have been a few promotion opportunites that have come up which i know i have a good chance of getting but if i got it i know the logical thing to do would be to put off ttc for another year or so to get to grips with my new role. i think my work will get annoyed if they give me a promotion and i turn around and declare that im pregnant.

All this said, my heart is battling with my mind. Ive waited what seems forever (i know some ladies have waited for so much longer so sorry to moan) and now ttc feels like its at my finger tips and it just wont happen. i know dp definately wants to put it off if i get a promotion and i know i probably should but it breaks my heart to know it could be another year at least!!

I dont want to get too excited with ttc date coming up and i know a promotion would be good. im just stuck in limbo not knowing how to feel or what to do... :\(

Sorry for the rant/rambling/moan....didnt know what else to do

x x x


  • hello

    i think you need to have a long think about what you want, when TTC i was at a point where i hated where i worked but the maternity package was good so i put up with it whilst TTC, we as a couple did not want to wait until i had found a new job and worked a year (usually the time you need to qualify for comapany mat pay)

    it may not happen straight away, it took us 11 months, would you feel happier getting a higher position now or it taking a year to TTC and missing out? in hindsight i wish i had moved job, as it turned out i would have probably been in a new job long enough and could kick myself for not doing it but i suppose i though it would happen quicker. have you though about what you would do after the baby, i am going back part time and plan to improve my career when we have compleated our family and they are all at school, if you are planning to go back full time its not really an issue but if you want part time they may not be able to offer you your old position also if you take more than 6 months they dont have to give you your old job back just one at the same grade

    there is so much to think about,
    good luck
  • hello and thankyou for your advice piggypops :\)

    I really do want to TTC and that is more important than moving up in my career at this stage in my life. I plan on going back to work part time and eventually full time and improve my career once i have had a child, well that would be my ideal plan.

    The more i think about it i think im just more worried about my family and friends thinking im making a big mistake by potentially missing out on a promotion for a baby which they see as a bigger life goal/aim than a baby whereas im more interested in a family than a career at this point in my life and i feel guilty about feeling like that for some reason :\?

    I think youre right about how TTC could take months/years so i guess i could just take the job if i get it and see what happens but still TTC and see how we get on. If i got pregnant after 4months(which is fairly quickly) i would still have been in my new role for just under a year so i would have the experience?

    Ahhh all these work technicalities and issues are stressful, if only we were rich and didnt have to think about these things lol

    Thanks again for sharing your advice and experiences, i still have a lot of things to think about but youve put things into perspective for me a bit more! :\)

    x x x
  • thats how we see it, i am only 26 so have years and years of working yet, i would rather not be in a stressful position with young children as a promotion would no doubt come with work to do at home and working over my hours which is not how i want my life to be at present, i am happy to work part time and not have little luxurys and spend time at home watching my LO grow, my best friend however does not want to sacrifice her lifestyle or career which is why she has gone back to work full time after her LO was 6 months, each family has different ideas and you need to do what works for you, there should be no reason why you cant go for the job as its in the same company and TTC, for me a happy family is an amazing life goal image
  • You're so right!! I think i feel the same as im in my early 20s ive got my whole life after my child to work on a carreer instead of the stresses of trying to do both.

    I have respect for people that manage it and are happy to do so but i dont think i would enjoy it or be able to cope juggling two lives and thats probably part of why i was worrying so much about everything.

    Thanks again for your wise words pp you really have helped me clear my mind and put things into perspective, a happy family really is the most important thing to me :\)
  • Hi *babydreamer* and piggypops,
    I'm stuck in the career/baby dilemma too, ideally I would like to find a new job and work for a year before TTC because I hate my job and my work colleagues, maternity pay isn't very good either. I have tried to find another job with little success so I feel like I'm stuck where i am for the moment so perhaps it is the right time for us to start TTC. I'll be 30 next year and I don't want to leave it too late as I would like a couple of children. So perhaps I'll end up with a recession babyimage I'm hoping by the time I will have our first child the job market may have picked up and I will have more experience behind me xxx
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