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Talkback: Self-soothing – why your baby needs this skill to sleep well


  • I attended my baby everytime he woke up, I feed him, comforted him and stayed with him until he fell asleep. It was exhausting but worth all the effort. At 20 months my son was happy enough to be put in the cot on his own after having milk and a book. He would tell me that it was dark, and then say "door" which was an indicator that he wanted the door shut. Now at 23 months old he is put down in his cot in a dark room (no nightlight). I put him down on his back and he rolls over on to his side and snuggles up with his bear.

    This article makes it sound like babies over 6 months are going to be troublesome to get to sleep on their own and that you will "have to break habits". Why take away comforts that your baby enjoys? Each child is ready in their own time and will eventually settle through the night.
  • Wow, I can't believe this article is making it sound as if all babies can self settle or even that all babies should be sleeping through the night (when actually very few do). I fed my daughter to sleep until she was a year old & I didn't create any bad habits, it's a completely natural way to help calm a baby & help them drift off. The methods in your article may work for some but parents need to be aware that you don't have to sleep train your child if that's not your choice.
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  • My daughter is 15months now n still cannot sleep on her own what should I do?
  • Your writing is great, my baby is always awake in the middle of the night and I do not know how to do it. Thank you for letting me know this experience, let us share more experiences
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  • I may be wrong here but this article appears to advise parents to wean the baby onto a tool or object, which will be used to self soothe. So the baby will become dependent on this object? What's the protocol for when or if this object gets misplaced our damaged. I'd recommend no object. I don't believe this is necessary. Currently my baby rocks his head from side to side a little and falls back to dreams of fountains of breast milk, and unlimited people ready to hold him and walk marathons. I believe in giving you're baby space to discover their own soothing mechanism, the parent must spot it and nurture it. Happy sleeps everyone.
  • "Learning to self-soothe is as important a milestone as smiling, crawling or walking."
    Although unlike all the other milestones where parents let babies do it in their own time, self settling is one that promoted as having a very definite timeline. Wonder why that is? I guess it suits the parents better that way.
  • edited Feb 14, 2020 9:33AM

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