the dummy debate...

KernowandNoah · Mar 5, 2011 4:57AM

Hi all,

I know this can be a controversial topic but just wanted some opinions/advice.

Noah is 8 weeks old and has been trying to find his thumb for about 2 weeks but hasn't been very successful (his co-ordination is not quite there!) which results in a grumpy baby who only settles with a bottle/feed. I am worried he is feeding too much (he is taking 5oz every 2-3 hours and is putting on weight very quickly - 6lb 140z at birth and at 7 week weigh in; 11lbs)and I think some of this may be comfort eating. I don't want to use a dummy if I can help it but worry if he doesn't find his thumb soon I may have to invest in one.

I'm just wondering if others have the same issues over comfort feeding and what you did to help.

Also if you do use a dummy at what age did you introduce it and does it work?

By the way I am aware a thumb is not better than a dummy (in terms of dental damage and difficulty in getting them to stop it is probably worse) but personally I would just prefer him to use his thumb.

Thanks for any help/advice

xx

judithcharmers · Mar 3, 2011 5:13AM

Sorry to gatecrash...

My son was comfort feeding and sucking and on the recommendation from my health visitor, I tried a dummy at two weeks old and he took to it straight away.

He is a year and a week old now and still has a dummy, but only at night and during his afternoon nap. He actually hands me his dummy when I get him out of the cot!

Personally, I don't see the problems with giving a baby a dummy if it relaxes them.

KernowandNoah · Mar 3, 2011 5:17AM

Thanks,

Can I just ask - was it difficult to get him to stop using the dummy in the day time or did you always just give it at night and for naps?

judithcharmers · Mar 3, 2011 5:22AM

He had his dummy all day every day until he was seven months old when he found his voice. It was pretty much his own doing. My husband also taught him to throw his dummy in the sink, which he found hilarious because of the noise and once it was out of sight it was most definitely out of mind.

Some parents aren't so lucky though, and I think the best thing a friend did to get rid of the dummy was to go cold turkey. Her baby girl (18 months) cried for 24 hours but then realised it was a thing of the past and has never sucked her thumb!

MummyS2Be · Mar 3, 2011 1:40PM

Hey,

I have had a similar problem with Jude. He wanted to comfort feed all the time and has gone from 8lb9oz at birth to 11lb10oz at 5 weeks. It was really hard for me to give him a dummy infact I cried when I first gave it to him as I didn't want him to have one and the first time that my mum saw him with a dummy she said 'oh Emma did you have to' because she is really against dummys and none of us children had one.

I had to do what was best for me and my family and the best thing was to give him a dummy. Jude doesnt have it all the time only after a big feed when I no that he is full and is just sucking for comfort and falling asleep. He does sometimes have it when falling asleep as I have noticed that he was sucking on the boob & then falling asleep coming off and then waking him self up!

We also gave him one when we thought he had colic but it just seems that he has bad wind! We gave him one at 3 or 4 weeks old! We hope that he is not going to have it for that long.

Hope that helps

Love

Emma & Jude

6 weeks! xxx

KernowandNoah · Mar 3, 2011 2:42PM

Thanks Emma - that's really interesting about what your mum said as both my mum and mil will be horrified but I'm thinking it's either a dummy or a 20 stone baby (exagerating of course!) and we have to do what's best for us and Noah. I've broached the subject with both of them but they are both like "he'll find his thumb soon, he's almost there" but he's been 'almost there' for about 3 weeks and is getting no closer but ever fatter!!

MummyS2Be · Mar 3, 2011 2:52PM

Hey.

Jude has also been trying to suck his fingers as well but someone also said to me that you can take a dummy away but you cant take their fingers. People think that dummy's cause alot of damage to growing and developing mouths but I believe and have been told by a mum who has experience (her son sucked his thumb and has been wearing braces for 5 years to correct it) that sucking thumbs is worse.

If you go down the dummy route then MAM ones I have found are better and have been recommended to me by a couple of other mums.

Hope that helps

Love

Ems & Jude xxx

firsttimeheidi · Mar 4, 2011 4:12AM

Hi zander has a dummy dut does not take it that much and never at night but is handy for when he due feed ect n he has to wait 5 mins. Heidi also had one n took it same way n I stopped giving her it at 7 months n she never missed it at all. Now at 14months if I put zanders in her mouth she does not even know what to do with it and flings it away.

I plan to do same this time but if zander won't to keep his longer that's fine to I say if they need it sometimes is fine I just hate when a baby toddlers has one in mouth 24/7 n no need for it!

Annie75 · Mar 4, 2011 7:47PM

I was completely against dummies before I had children. However, when Joshua was 1 week old, he got terrible colic and the midwife suggested giving him a dummy to help. At the time I was struggling with PND, and refused to even think about it. Anyway, Josh was really bad with trapped wind so I gave in and got my husband to buy him one. It was amazing, it really helped to pass his wind, as he sucked on the dummy he would pump out his bottom!! We only ever gave it to him to help settle him, and he only ever had it in his cot or his pram if he wanted to sleep whilst we were out. When he got older we threw away the old ones and never replaced them, then told him he didn't need them anymore and he was fine with it.

We now use a dummy with Rebekah, and again it helps her wind. As soon as she has got rid of the wind, she spits the dummy out and goes to sleep.

earwig1971 · Mar 5, 2011 4:57AM

I've also been against a dummy, but of course that was before having a child!!

Mia is now 7 weeks old and loves to suck on her own thumb, fingers, fist....the more she can fit in her mouth, the better it would seem!! We have tried her with a dummy and it has worked twice, allowing her to settle into sleep within about 30 seconds, but mostly she just spits it out or gags on it. She only gets offered it when I know she has a full tummy and is still unsettled, and we've tried everything else...very much the last resort. But I guess because she's not offered it every day, she's not familiar with it and spits it out.

Everything is trial and error at this stage...enjoy the ride!

the dummy debate...

Replies