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I've had the most horrendous few days........(soz - v. long)
Hi girls,
Sorry this is not really ttc related but feel like I need to get some stuff off my chest. It's easy to say it on here too because it doesn't seem to affect 'real life' if you know what I mean.
I was at work on Saturday and had a call from my mum to say my Grandma was very sick and wasn't expected to make the end of the day. I dashed home from work (an hour) and then jumped in the car and drove the 125 miles to where my mum and Grandma live. I was lucky, I made it in time. She was in a really bad way and it was horrible to see her like that and really horrible for my mum too. I spent a few hours with her and then went back to my mum's. The next day dh and I went to church with my Mother and Father in Law (they'd travelled 100 miles too so was really kind of bad timing). It had been arranged weeks before because the church was having a special service for people married there in the last two years. Went back to see my Grandma after church and said my goodbyes before we drove home.
DH was brilliant all weekend and I couldn't stop thanking him for being there with me.
Anyway, this is where it all changes.........went to my local pub on Sunday afternoon as was feeling pretty delicate re the Grandma situation. It was a lovely day and lots of our friends were there. We live in a very small village, with only one pub and the community spirit is great. After a number of drinks, a friend of mine told me that my DH had kissed another of my friends!!!!!! Almost fell of my stool. I completely believed her because of what was said. Anyway, said nothing other that walked past said 'other friend' and when she said 'Are you OK' just replied 'No - don't ever speak to me again'. Took DH home and ripped his head off.
DH is not entirely to blame and certainly not blameless but I do blame her most. I know the night in question and DH had gone into town with a group of friends, including said friend (and I've NEVER had a problem with DH going out with mutual female friends if I don't feel like it). He was absolutely pissed as a parrot when he got home and I know she was sober. She's very attractive and very flirty so I can understand why someone might make a stupid fool of themselves while drunk. Not that I condone it. Since then she's apparently been clicking her fingers and saying that if she wants my DH then he's hers!! Now, that really riled me.
Went back to the pub the same day, admittedly a little tipsy (!!!) and told her exactly what I thought of her and that she wasn't to mess with me or my marriage because she would lose. DH got a telling off and he's very sorry, and I completely believe him, and he is now under curfew (which he totally accepts).
Anyway, feel very hurt but realise that a drunken kiss is not the end of the World - we've been together 7 and a half years and nothing like this has happened before. We will move on from this and get stronger. Couldn't face work on Monday morning so rang in sick and then got a phonecall from my Mum at 8.30am to say Grandma had died on Sunday night. Just to stick the boot in.
To top it all, after feeling lousy, a fool, hurt by DH and friend and sad over Grandma, bloody AF turned up three days early yesterday.
I just want to crawl into a hole a sleep for weeks. But I WILL NOT let this woman affect my marriage. She's a little slapper and a complete snake; pretending to be my friend whilst all along she has been literally prowling and pursuing my husband. I hope she has a very lonely and unhappy life from now on. Have told DH that he will have to deal with the gossip but that I expect to still go to our local and for him to stand shoulder to shoulder with me.
Sorry to rant and moan but just needed to tell someone. Very difficult to talk about this sort of thing with people who actually know you because that can then add more fuel to the fire.
Thanks for listening girls and I do hope that you all had a better weekend.
xxxxxxxxx
Sorry this is not really ttc related but feel like I need to get some stuff off my chest. It's easy to say it on here too because it doesn't seem to affect 'real life' if you know what I mean.
I was at work on Saturday and had a call from my mum to say my Grandma was very sick and wasn't expected to make the end of the day. I dashed home from work (an hour) and then jumped in the car and drove the 125 miles to where my mum and Grandma live. I was lucky, I made it in time. She was in a really bad way and it was horrible to see her like that and really horrible for my mum too. I spent a few hours with her and then went back to my mum's. The next day dh and I went to church with my Mother and Father in Law (they'd travelled 100 miles too so was really kind of bad timing). It had been arranged weeks before because the church was having a special service for people married there in the last two years. Went back to see my Grandma after church and said my goodbyes before we drove home.
DH was brilliant all weekend and I couldn't stop thanking him for being there with me.
Anyway, this is where it all changes.........went to my local pub on Sunday afternoon as was feeling pretty delicate re the Grandma situation. It was a lovely day and lots of our friends were there. We live in a very small village, with only one pub and the community spirit is great. After a number of drinks, a friend of mine told me that my DH had kissed another of my friends!!!!!! Almost fell of my stool. I completely believed her because of what was said. Anyway, said nothing other that walked past said 'other friend' and when she said 'Are you OK' just replied 'No - don't ever speak to me again'. Took DH home and ripped his head off.
DH is not entirely to blame and certainly not blameless but I do blame her most. I know the night in question and DH had gone into town with a group of friends, including said friend (and I've NEVER had a problem with DH going out with mutual female friends if I don't feel like it). He was absolutely pissed as a parrot when he got home and I know she was sober. She's very attractive and very flirty so I can understand why someone might make a stupid fool of themselves while drunk. Not that I condone it. Since then she's apparently been clicking her fingers and saying that if she wants my DH then he's hers!! Now, that really riled me.
Went back to the pub the same day, admittedly a little tipsy (!!!) and told her exactly what I thought of her and that she wasn't to mess with me or my marriage because she would lose. DH got a telling off and he's very sorry, and I completely believe him, and he is now under curfew (which he totally accepts).
Anyway, feel very hurt but realise that a drunken kiss is not the end of the World - we've been together 7 and a half years and nothing like this has happened before. We will move on from this and get stronger. Couldn't face work on Monday morning so rang in sick and then got a phonecall from my Mum at 8.30am to say Grandma had died on Sunday night. Just to stick the boot in.
To top it all, after feeling lousy, a fool, hurt by DH and friend and sad over Grandma, bloody AF turned up three days early yesterday.
I just want to crawl into a hole a sleep for weeks. But I WILL NOT let this woman affect my marriage. She's a little slapper and a complete snake; pretending to be my friend whilst all along she has been literally prowling and pursuing my husband. I hope she has a very lonely and unhappy life from now on. Have told DH that he will have to deal with the gossip but that I expect to still go to our local and for him to stand shoulder to shoulder with me.
Sorry to rant and moan but just needed to tell someone. Very difficult to talk about this sort of thing with people who actually know you because that can then add more fuel to the fire.
Thanks for listening girls and I do hope that you all had a better weekend.
xxxxxxxxx
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Replies
As for this girl I would of knocked her out. What have all your other friends said about this?
I am so sorry to hear about your nan, she is at peace now and no longer in pain. I also lost a very colse family friend on Sat just gone and I have tried not to talk about it as it;s so upsetting but you will get through this. you sound like a very strong person and we are all hear for you to talk to xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Try to stay calm and take some time for yourself. You definitely deserve it.
*big hugs*
And, Lulubellarama, I agree. I know he's been feeling really scared about ttc. Not that he doesn't want kids, but you know men, the slightest thought that they might just have to grow up scares them!
Thanks for all your messages.
xxxxMrsHopeful
Well, what a cr*p weekend you've had.....I'm really sorry to hear about your Grandma. The emotions of all of your weekend most likely had that effect on your hormones and hence the early AF (don't you just hate it!).
Re your DH, i am sure he is very very sorry, and i know how it feels to have friend and a husband betray you. However, a marriage holds 'history', and that is irreplaceable, so for this so called 'friend' to deliberatly behave like this is totally unacceptable, and she needs her arse kicked!
My (ex) husband was a bar manager and one night we had gone to the bar for a friends birthday, and i felt pretty good, but i noticed that the barmaid kept on 'checking' me out. It was hy husbands, cousins' wife, and i just assumed that she was looking to see how much weight i'd lost (because i'd lost about 5 stone), anyway, i couldnt have been more wrong because she was actually sleeping with my husband behind my back and had been for 6 months. I told her exactly what i thought of her, and she has been scared of me ever since......i've seen her physically shake!!! I actually felt very sorry for my husband, and whilst he was equally to blame, she rattled me more. The reason we are now divorced is far more complex.
So, i just wanted to add my bit so you know that there are some very spiteful people out there, and she obviously is totally unfulfilled in her own life.
I truly hope that you and DH are ok, and i hope you have a peaceful week.
XXXX
I noticed a spelling mistake on my previous post - I meant if he had done more (not me!!) he would be out of the door.
xxxx
MrsHopeful - i think that the whole 'men are from mars' thing is true....... and i think that as women, we should be sticking together and not stabbing each other backs, and thats why i think to give him some benefit of the doubt.
Take care xxxx
God, I sound like some sort of psycho!!!!! I'm not into violence but I am happy with mental torture!!!!!!
xxxxxx
sarah
xxx