help! struggling sept mum

Baby_B · Sep 22, 2009 4:30PM

our gorgeous daughter was born on tues and i am really struggling and wondered if anyone can help/reassure me.

beth just won't go in her moses basket. we've tried putting her in sound asleep but she wakes and screams. and if she's awake it's even worse. so we are having to just let her sleep on us. will things change? how can we get her to sleep in the basket? we are never going to sleep ourselves if she's always on us.

also she is so hard to settle. it takes hours of rocking and back rubbing before she will fall asleep and then we can't move her or it starts all over again.

I sometimes feel like i want to put her back in. i feel so stressed i can't fall asleep even when i ger the chance.

will things get better? is this normal?

shons · Sep 12, 2009 7:38AM

hello,

Hope you don't mind me jumping in from the May forum.I can reassure you it will get better, the first few weeks are always the hardest. I don't know what to suggest other than swaddling her in a blanket. Not sure if you have tried it but babies tend to love the feeling of security when tightly wrapped.

Enjoy your gorgeous little bundle and I hope it feels better for you soon.

xx

ladyblue · Sep 12, 2009 2:28PM

i'd agree with swaddling mothercare do a good swaddling blanket,

Is she a bit windy? even a while after a feed if Isla needs winding she screams on her back.

lisalilypops · Sep 12, 2009 3:45PM

Hiya,
We had this at first and (if you are talking about at night) we were told its because at night it is completely quiet, and baby has been used to hearing your heart beat for past months, and will sleep in the day as there is background noise - ie, people talking or the tv on etc. Try the swaddling the girls said or put a clock that ticks under the moses basket to simulate your heart,
We let Lily sleep on me at first then when she wanted feeding we put her in the basket after, we also have a rolled up blanket pushed up against her so it feels like the pressure of being held. Touch wood she is fine now, and will sleep in the basket or pram as long as she has the rolled up blanket.
Hope some of this helps.
Lisa & Lily (19 days old) xx

P.S Congrats on your little girl!!!

[Modified by: lisabump on September 12, 2009 08:46 PM]

MummyG3 · Sep 12, 2009 6:29PM

My midwife showed me a tric where you roll up a towel and place it round the top of the moses basket so it is snug round his head like the head support of a car seat, really works with my bertie

K-lou · Sep 13, 2009 5:02AM

Hi hun

This is just how my little girl was who is now 5 weeks today and she has just started to get better. Rose has had colic so this was the main problem for us but I have only just started to swaddle her and this works a treat. It would be that Rose was fall asleep I would put her down and within 5 mins she would jolt and then wake herself up. It would also take me or hubby to rock and hold her for hours till she got to sleep now I just put her down and she seems to go off herself.

Your little one is very young and maybe just needs to feel you near her Rose was just the same and it's hard work but trust me it really does get easier and this is very normal

K xx

LoobyLou_no3 · Sep 13, 2009 5:49AM

I totally understand and things do get better, the way I explained it to myself is that our babies have been cuddled in our wombs with the gentle hum of our body ticking and creating noises for 9 months and then they come out and have all this space and silence. I found that swaddling really helped and its only till they get to understand that we are not far away and when they wake we pick them up. My little one is 3 weeks and he improves everyday x x

When things are bad and i'm really tired it help to say to myself, its not like this forever.

K x x x

mrs__e · Sep 13, 2009 12:38PM

hi hun i keep thinking about you and found this post. i promise you it gets better, thomas was just like this. quite a few nights i found myself holding him until he was asleep, and then slooooowly putting him into his moses basket - and as i put him down i would still be holding him/resting myself against him (hurt my back!) but it worked some of the time - so that he didn't all of a sudden feel he was alone. he liked to know we were there and he wanted to be close to us. i promise it gets better!
big hugs hun i hope things improve soon xxxx
ps swaddling may help - it didn't help us but it does work for some people

breighlin · Sep 14, 2009 8:50AM

Sorry for gc. Michael used to be very much like that. Some tips we got:

1) Wear a muslin with you all day and than put it with your lo in moses basket. It transfers your smell into the moses basket and it might help them relax.
2) warm up the moses basket before putting lo in it. Use a hot water bottle and put it in when you take lo out during the night. When you than put lo back take out the hot water bottle and lo should not wake up because of a change in temperature.
3) use a ticking clock and put it close to moses basket, some babies settle really well with this because it reminds them of the womb and your heartbeat. Some however want the real thing.
4) swaddeling can help, but you do not have to buy a swaddling blanket. you can easily do it with a normal one. Just to try out atleast before you spend money on it and find out it only irritated lo more.

Number 1 and 2 really worked for our lo. It will get better believe me. Michael now sleeps anywhere in any bed in any room. And he rarely wants to sleep on us. He actually refuses to now. We do put him down every time with a muslin though, that way he always has our smell and his own,whereever he is.

bitso · Sep 18, 2009 2:29PM

My little boy is 6 weeks today and was born 6 weeks early. We've had loads of trouble with sleeping - he too loves sleeping on us! One thing we've found does work is that we've put the moses basket in the middle of our bed and when he cries / wakes one of us will put our hand in and fall asleep with it on his chest. Sometimes he'll drop off and we can remove our hand sometimes we fall asleep with our hand still on him. The midwife says that some babies like the reassurance that you're there. It might work.

Also if it's any consolation this is very common. I was getting really stressed and thought I was the only person going through this until I spoke to a few more mums at baby clinic who have experienced the same thing. One mum suggested getting a book called the baby whisperer, not sure if it's any good but I have ordered a copy.

God luck with it all xx

hollysmumbump · Sep 22, 2009 3:30PM

hia hun nice 2 see a familiar face!! we had the same trouble with samuel until he was about 3 weeks old he just wouldnt sleep in his crib at night and would only sleep with me!! hes now fine in his crib,swaddling has helped alot and try rolling blankets up either side so it feels like they are snug and being cuddled.Good luck xxx

littlerose · Sep 22, 2009 4:30PM

Hi, Roisin cried whenever she was in the fishtank in hospital, I would secretly pick her up when the midwives weren't looking! She hated the moses basket at first, I slept on the sofa for the first week with the moses basket pushed right up against it. Whenever she became agitated I'd just stick my hand in and stroke her chest until she calmed down. It was always so tempting to just put her on me as I knew she'd sleep but so glad I persevered. She soon got used to it. I also swaddle her, and during daytime sleeps when she nods off on me first I wedge a cushion up against her so she still feels nice and snug. It'll happen for you! x

Helen

help! struggling sept mum

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