Too personal question?!

MrsBambino · Nov 30, 2008 1:29PM

Hello ladies
hope it's not too personal to ask everyone, (i figured we share CM details and all sorts on these boards, so hopefully ok to ask...) How often in an average month would you say you BD? Do those of you who have been trying quite a long time (in my case over 2 years..) find BDing has changed? I must confess, sometimes I feel so annoyed at myself if we 'miss' a fertile opportunity if you know what i mean and then, equally some months, although I do enjoy BD, I feel a bit like there's less 'point' to it all if I think I have already OV'd and not really much chance of getting pg....(I know that must sound dreadful)

Would love to hear from you all...

xx

[Modified by: MrsBambino on 29 November 2008 19:48:20 ]

Socksxx · Nov 29, 2008 4:01PM

We are coming up to month 9, I recon we bd 8 - 10 times a month but generally every other day over ov. I know what you mean though about feeling gutted if you have missed a fertile opportunity and feeling like there is "less point" when you are not fertile. We generally still have fun when we are bd-ing I can probably count on one hand the number of times we have just done it because we had to xx

MrsBambino · Nov 29, 2008 4:04PM

thanks MrsAmanda - reading your post was like hearing myself speak!!

I feel like that too sometimes. It's all so hard sometimes. At the moment I'd say we try to bd about every 3 days, i know they say you should do it more than that but I find if i am tired it is hard to stay, well, er 'motivated'! And, as you say, hard to feel romantic when you feel you have to do it to a schedule...Some months it has only been a couple of times - mainly my fault as I know i dwell too much on the actual thoughts of ttc...

I'm conscious we need to make a decision re the whole IVF process soon - if we do decide to go private - cos I am really at the point of feeling utterly consumed with tears etc every month when AF arrives on cue.

Thanks for replying. xx

MrsBambino · Nov 29, 2008 4:08PM

thanks socks - I hope you get your BFP soon - it sounds like your keeping up a good pace with the bd'ing so that's bound to help!

Looking back, I think our first year of TTC I found it easier to 'want' to do it more often, prob every other night, but I'm afraid to say now that we're over the 2 year mark, i do get a bit fixated with the whole process...

Thanks for replying and wishing you lots of luck. xx

MrsBambino · Nov 29, 2008 4:09PM

oops, double post.

[Modified by: MrsBambino on November 29, 2008 08:10 PM]

Socksxx · Nov 29, 2008 4:21PM

I am not surprised! I only post in here very occasionally because I am very aware that we have only been trying for almost 9 months. I spend most of my time in ttc after mc forum because we lost one in July. I don't think I would stick on the site if it was not for the fantastic girls in ttc after mc because I find ttc a bit full on the symptom spotting drives me nuts because none of it means anything. It really makes my day when I see bfp's from here and ttc after mc not that the others don't deserve it but ... well you know. Anyway what I am trying to say, and badly I am aware I am waffling, is that I am sure if I am still in it in 2 years time I will feel the same. Life is so unbelievably cruel, I would love to wave a wand over all of you in here xxx

MrsBambino · Nov 29, 2008 4:33PM

awe thanks socks - I hope (in the nicest possible way!!) you're not still posting by 2years! $:\$ )

I'm so sorry to hear about your mc - I can't even begin to imagine.

You're right though - it is so encouraging and exciting to read about BFPs which have been waited on for a while, or after mc (although I'm saying that conscious that ANY amount of time can feel like a long time when you want soemthing so much...even after 6 months I was pulling my hair out with symptom spotting lol).

I totally agree, any wanted BFP is woderful news, but it makes me smile even more when it happens to a lady who has had a lot to overcome, if you know what I mean. I hope we all get our bambinos soon. One thing is for sure, they'll be so wanted and loved - even if they keep us awake all night!! tee hee. xx

[Modified by: MrsBambino on November 29, 2008 08:34 PM]

Anne28 · Nov 29, 2008 5:00PM

Hi, I am on a break at the moment due to a cervical biopsy. Planning to start again in January (but might have a go next month!)

I have found that my oh seems to have 'gone off' bd'g at the moment. When we are 'trying', he is up for it all the time, and we just generally bd every other day, but since I said we should wait after my abnormal smears, he seems a bit reluctant. I dont know if he just hates using condoms (which he does!) or if its because he is worried incase we accidentaly got caught, and is worried about my health or something. he doesnt talk about his feelings much, and I dont know how to ask without it sounding like criticism!! MEN!

Amber-Lous-Mum · Nov 29, 2008 5:09PM

Well dh is often more up for bding than I am and he always wants to do it to schedule so to speak - so we're doing it every other day at the mo. It does get quite standard and most of the time we're only doing it for a prpose, but I would say about 50% of the time I genuinely enjoy it - the rest of the time it is sooo unromantic! But we both want kids soo much and we cant make it romantic when we're doing it that often after a hard days work and that - and neither of us mind really - as long as we get that BFP one day! It tends to be after ovulation that we have the best bd'ing and we do relax and let go a bit more then. But we're a team and we're in it together so dh doesnt feel pressured - he knows my cycle as well as I do cos he wants to and he wants to bd at the right time as much as I do...so despite the occasional unromantic bd'ing we're both happy about it!!
xx

mrssmith69 · Nov 30, 2008 6:53AM

Hi we still bed about 3-4 times a week even though we know we need IVF we still fancy each other like mad and have always and quite a healthy sex life and don't want to make having a baby the only reason we bed

MrsBambino · Nov 30, 2008 1:29PM

interesting everyone! Seems it varies quite a bit for us all. Thanks for your replies. xx

Too personal question?!

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