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Feeding Support
After reading recent posts I thought it would be a good idea to have a feeding support group in born in April
I originally thought about making it a breast feeding support group but thinking about it there are so many ways to feed our LOs and there is already so much focus on breast feeding that I think it should really be a general feeding thread.
Well so far I have been exclusively breast feeding and have been really lucky not to have any pain at all.
Fin is now 3 weeks and I have been thinking of giving him a formula feed before he goes to bed.
I always said that I would never put pressure on myself to BF but I am and even though I can see positives to giving him the bottle (hubby can feed him, I can get a good run of sleep etc) I keep telling myself that I would be letting him down ( I know this is nuts and not true at all)
I have tried expressing but can't even get enough for a full feed.
I also think Fin is tongue tied and have tried him on a dummy but he can't seem to keep it in (think this is due to the tongue tie) so he is unable to use a dummy for comfort and uses me instead which is exhausting.
So anyway that is how we are getting on at the moment.
How is everyone else doing?
I originally thought about making it a breast feeding support group but thinking about it there are so many ways to feed our LOs and there is already so much focus on breast feeding that I think it should really be a general feeding thread.
Well so far I have been exclusively breast feeding and have been really lucky not to have any pain at all.
Fin is now 3 weeks and I have been thinking of giving him a formula feed before he goes to bed.
I always said that I would never put pressure on myself to BF but I am and even though I can see positives to giving him the bottle (hubby can feed him, I can get a good run of sleep etc) I keep telling myself that I would be letting him down ( I know this is nuts and not true at all)
I have tried expressing but can't even get enough for a full feed.
I also think Fin is tongue tied and have tried him on a dummy but he can't seem to keep it in (think this is due to the tongue tie) so he is unable to use a dummy for comfort and uses me instead which is exhausting.
So anyway that is how we are getting on at the moment.
How is everyone else doing?
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Replies
As people might know from my recent posts, I'm trying to BF, and was planning on doing this exclusively, but I've not been able to satisfy my not so little man so far, so he's been getting formula too, only about 9 fl oz a day. My milk came in today, so I'm really hopeful that I can get back to BF exclusively, although I'm keen to express to hubby can help at might, and will not be punishing myself if we have to keep up with the suplemental formula, we have enough pressure as it is without putting it on ourselves! We shall see. At the end of it all, if our little ones are healthy and happy, we are doing the right thing. None of then want a stressed Mummy just for the sake of a bit of boob!
Hxx and LJ
I exclusively bf for 1st 3 weeks. I found it very painful, as rhea would only latch on my left boob. After about 10 days she finally latched onto the right. But it got to the point where everytime she cried I burst into tears cause I just couldn't do it anymore, my boobs where in agony & I just didn't want her near me! It was getting so bad my hubby thought post natal was setting in. I said I wanted her on formula for a few feeds, so we put her on a couple of 3oz bottles a day but she was still wanting more & more. After speaking to health visitor we increased it to 3 4oz bottles which over the week we've increased it to 3 5oz bottles as she was mostly finishing the 4oz ones.
I'm so much happier now doing a bit of both makes her much more settled & I'm not in pain. I also feel that she putting on that much needed weight, as she's still not back at birth weight yet, hope it has gone up a bit when hv comes on tues as she has said if she's not at it on tues she's gonna look at bringing in ped. which I don't want as I feel she's healthy, just hungry!
Jayne & rhea 4 weeks & 2 days
I'm exclusively bfing, but have to admit that there have been times, especially in the early hours of the morning, when I felt I couldn't cope with the constant feeding and would love to give Kayleigh-Mae to someone else to feed for a bit.
I have however been able to express about 4ozs off every day and freeze it so on day's when i'm absolutely shattered, DH can do the last feed before bed. Although Kayleigh-Mae doesn't take well to the bottle and I think she gets a bit freaked out that it's daddy who has the milk as he doesn't smell right
I know they say breast is best, and it is, but not to the detriment of mum as baby suffers too. No-one should beat themselves up or feel a failure for doing what is best for them and ultimately their baby.
Someone help me down from my soap box
I love looking at how much my baby has grown though and knowing that it's because of me. Sorry if that sounds smug.
Karen + Kayleigh-Mae 32 days old and a total booby monster
I also found that in hospital all the midwives were really pushy and when trying to "help" me with feeding all they were doing was being really forceful and stressing Fin and I out. I definately found it alot easier once I was at home and not under any pressure to do it the way they said was right.
I have decided now that if I do give Fin some formula in the evenings then I am not going to beat myself up about it.
I need to stop putting pressure on myself I think.
I had thought it would get easier once my milk came in, which it has done now, but I am so sore, and earlier he fed from breast to breast for over an hour, only to still be hungry and need formula to settle.
I just don't know what to do. The idea of never breastfeeding again is very apealing right now, but I just don't know that I'll be able to forgive myself if I give up after only days.
It doesn't help that he never settles (by himself) after breast, but generally will settle for at least 30 mins after bottle.
Any advice would be great.
I by no means have any right answers. But u sound exactly how I felt, I had been feeding from breast to breast for over an hour & rhea just would not settle. Even after we introduced a top up of formula she would only settle for a little bit. It was driving me insane & wanted to give up. Then we increased her formula & it seems to have helped. She still takes about half hour to settle but the way I think is that we couldn't sleep on a full tummy. She would usually sleep around 3 hours then. My health visitor put it like this to me about feeding her formula, the formula is like a big plate of steak & chips, it fills u up & makes u content, then a few hours later u may fancy a wee cup of tea & a biscuit just to give u a boost, which is where the breast milk comes in.
So we've been mixed feeding for just over a week now & it just seems to be working.
Hope u feel better soon & remember there is no right or wrong, do whatever makes mummy happy cause baby will be happier too
jayne & rhea xx
First, take a deep breath and remind yourself that as long as your son is being fed, that's really all that's important. Guilt doesn't need to enter the equation. You're doing your best in a new and baffling situation.
Firstly, when you say he is feeding 'from breast to breast', what do you mean? How long is he feeding on the first breast before you move him to the second, and what inspires you to swap him over - does he come off the first breast by himself, does the breast feel soft and 'emptier', what happens when you take him off the first breast? Are you winding him - some babies will feed and feed and feed when they actually have wind, they confuse the gripe in their tummies with hunger.
If you're swapping him frequently between breasts, he may not be getting enough of the richer hindmilk that satisfies hunger - as you feed, the baby will firstly get watery foremilk, that satisfies thirst, and this gradually changes to the richer hindmilk. If you are swapping him frequently, next feed try giving him just one breast. If he unlatches, try latching him back on and see if he will continue to feed.
You say you are sore - is it the ache of engorgement or are your nipples sore? Sore nipples are almost always a sign of less than perfect latch - poor latch can also impede milk transfer which is why he may seem to feed for ages but remain unsatisfied.
What position do you feed him in? It may be worth trying a new position to see if that aids his latch and relieves soreness. The rugby/football hold is always a good one and relatively easy with a small baby, it also makes it very easy too see his latch. Picture here:
http://pregnancy.about.com/od/breastfeedinginfo/ss/breastpositions_3.htm
Regarding his latch there is a wealth of links and info here - I bloody love Kellymom, it has an answer for everything!
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/start/basics/latch-resources.html
Do you have access to a pump? If you are substituting bottle feeds it's a good idea to pump to maintain your supply. You can also build a supply of EBM to feed from a bottle - might be worth giving him a bottle of EBM to see if he settles after that, it will tell you if he settles better after formula because he isn't feeding effectively at the breast, or just because formula is harder to digest, makes them 'fuller' and tends to knock them out for longer (I'm not anti formula but it's acknowledged that this is the case).
I is such a tough time but it will pass so do whatever you need to do to get through the next few days but try and bf if you can or express and I'm sure you'll be back on track by mid week.
Xxxx
What worries you about giving formula? Is it concern about your supply, concern he will develop teat preference, or concern that you are giving formula? Put it all out of your head. Babies who aren't feeding optimally at the breast need feeding somehow, you are just meeting his needs in the best way you know how. Pumping, if you can, will help to protect your supply, I'd also suggest trying to eat some oatmeal (porridge) at least once a day, as that can often help boost supply. What pump do you have?
It does sound like his latch is a bit shonky. Engorgement will make it harder for him to latch on so trying to hand express off a little milk before latching him on can help. Do this into a sterile container and it can be saved and fed. If you've not been shown how to hand express, yell and I will link you up with some resources - it's a skill, but once you get the hang of it it's easy.
It's also worth trying a deep latch technique - you can google for directions, it basically involves stroking the nipple all the way down from his forehead to his upper lip to encourage him to open really wide. If he latches on and it's not great, don't be afraid to take him off and relatch, and do this over and over until it's a good latch. Your nipples will thank you.
For the soreness, Lansinoh is great but also try expressing some milk onto the nipple, letting it air dry then putting your boob away. Breat milk is magic and will help with the cracked nipple pain.
Another thing to consider, if he comes off the boob and won't go back on but you don't think he's emptied it, is breast compressions (yes, I bang on about these, but I think they are the dogs kahunas for poor feeders).
http://www.breastfeedingmums.com/dr_jack_newman_breast_compression.htm
Babies feed very rapidly at first, stimulating the letdown and a fast milk flow, then settle into a rhythm of slower, deeper sucks where the milk doesn't flow quite as fast. It sounds like he might just be being a bit lazy once the milk flow slows down, doesn't want to work the breast for more milk, but will happily go ontio a second breast where the let down will be fast again. All well and good, but he won't be getting enough hindmilk so will feel unsatisfied and want to constantly snack at the breast instead of taking decent fulfilling feeds. If you can get him latched back on to the first boob once he loses interest, and try breast compression to keep the milk flowing, that might help a bit.
I hope I haven't swamped you with info, if you want, my email button is on and you're welcome to email me off forum any time if you need support. Just to clarify, I'm not a trained peer supporter or anything (yet!) but I've run the gamut of feeding problems and done a lot of reading on BF and tend to retain mostly-useless information!
K x
I was in floods of tears in hospital after being treated like some sort of shoddy mother because B/F was not happening very easily.
I think your tips are brill and shall be trying them out. Am battling on with breast feeding although in a lot of pain and finding it exhausting. But I WILL NOT quit, because I am stupidly stubborn !
xx
I think sometimes midwives forget the sheer panic that overwhelms you when you realise the enormity of parenthood! Also I think some of them have never had children, or have been fortunate enough never to have problems breastfeeding. I've faced challenges with both of mine, and it gives you a different perspective. I'm pro breastfeeding, but I'm not anti formula as some people can come across as being - and I'm not pro breast to the detriment of a mum's wellbeing and sanity. Being able to enjoy your new baby is the most important thing.
Thanks!
K x
If you are relaxed about adding formula into the mix, I'd say so many wouldn't be necessary - maybe 6 max? I know it's cruel but one pumping session during the night is best if you can - the levels of hormones that stimulate milk supply respond more during the night. Sorry!
Most important is to empty the breast - this is where breast massage and breast compressions come in handy! Try to pump for a few minutes after the milk stops coming, it places a demand on your breasts that they will meet by increasing your supply.
As always, wealth of info on Kellymom:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/supply/maintainsupply-pump.html
hth. xx
However, like KayeCee, I want to make sure he's getting the best, and won't suffer because I can't do it, so I want to express and just top up with formula if needed. I bought a manual Tommee Tippee pump before he arrived, which I managed to get about 4oz with across 2 sessions yesterday, but believe I will struggle to use it for the volume I need, so thought I'd ask for opinions on the best pump to get. I'll continue with the one I have for now to ensure I keep producing, but would like to replad by the end of the week.
Thanks in advance
Hxx