Advice please?

Shell311 · Apr 17, 2008 4:46AM

Hi girls, it's been a couple of weeks since i've been on here as it seems that i've got less time now that Paige is getting older than when she was newborn, she likes to be entertained all the time, lol.

I'm thinking of giving up breastfeeding soon and i just wanted a bit of advice if anyone can help. I bf my other 2 babies for 11 & 9 mths, so i feel like i'm giving up too soon this time but i'm finding that i feel drained all the time, but i can't get Paige to take a bottle at all.

Paige had her 4 mth needles last week and when the doctor asked how i was feeling i started crying and told him that Paige had been sick with bronchiolitis for 2 weeks and had been feeding every 2 hours and was unusually grizzly and very clingy, not letting me out of her sight without screaming. I'm feeling really tired and run down all the time and getting cranky with hubby if he's late home from work and i'm always snapping at my other girls,

My doctor seemed a bit more concerned about me than Paige with her ongoing cold so i mentioned to him about maybe putting her on formula. I could tell that he didn't really want to tell me whether i should stop bf or not but i think he was trying to sway me towards bottle feeding to give myself a bit of a break.

I think my body isn't really coping with bf too well this time, my periods still haven't started after 18 weeks and with my other 2 they started at 7 weeks while breastfeeding. I also have absolutely no desire for sex at all and have not even attempted to have sex with hubby yet, although he's not pressuring me either as he seems to know that i'm not quite right ready yet.

This is going on forever, lol, long story short i'm wondering if i stop breastfeeding will i be less tired and maybe want to have sex soon?

Shell & Paige

Emalenna · Apr 16, 2008 9:14AM

I'm with you on this Shell... I have been so tired recently and snapping at my other 2....I also have no desire for sex at all.... Fortunately Bryn hasn't been ill..... You sound like you have had a really rough trot of it recently and you've continued bfing throughout so well done to you! You have given Paige a brilliant start.... I gave up bfing last weekend after I felt that I needed a break form having Bryn attached to me every 2 hours.... On the upside he is feeding less and oh can take over from me - on the down side when he wakes up at night (which he has been doing) its more of a fuss getting his bottle and I can't just close my eyes and let him get on with it!

I have just been diagnosed with pnd - its only mild but its having a huge effect on me at the mo - I'm not saying that you have it but it might be something worth mentioning to your hv.

If you do decide to stop bfing then don't feel you are failing Paige - I bf'd Ophelia for a lot longer but only bf'd Tristan for 3 months and hes a very healthy 16 year old now.

Sorry I'm starting to ramble - finding it difficult to concentrate at the mo. I cant tell you whether its right for you to stop or not, just wanted you to know you're not alone. let me know how you get on.

Big hugs. Emma x

xxxElxxx · Apr 16, 2008 9:25AM

Shell,

You have done well to feed her thus far and she'll be on solids soon. It sounds like your instincts are telling you it's time and that all you now need is other people to tell you it's the right thing to almost give you 'permission' It is completely your decision and that is what is so difficult about it, it all comes down to you! The responsibility of that can be a little overwhelming.

I am still bf but after 3 bouts of very bad mastitus I decided it would not be viable to bf if I got it again so have introduced one ff a day. And surprisingly enough I've found it just as lovely. My lo snuggles in close in the same position and feeds just the same as if it were me - something that I guess I thought wouldn't happen / would be so different to bf. It also means that I can have a break and hand him over to someone else.

No one can make the decision but you, let your instincts guide you and remember your lo will be happy whatever you decided to do.

El x

alioli123 · Apr 16, 2008 11:38AM

Hi Shell, sorry to hear you're not feeling at your best atm. Like Em and El said, no one but you can make the decision to stop or continue with bfing. However, I can tell you from my own personal experience that when I stopped with my 3 (between 6-8 weeks) I felt relieved and gained back my life. I also felt guilty with ds1 at stopping so soon, but was very realistic with the other 2 as I had other kids to consider as well as my lo.
You've all done a great job for bfing for 4 mths and should feel proud of yourself.
Good luck on your decision and hope you feel better soon x
PS We only had a reacquaintance once while i was bf as i hated my boobs leaking during the deed! Def enjoy it now! TMI

Shell311 · Apr 16, 2008 7:49PM

Thanks for your replies girls, i think i just need a bit of reassurance that i'm not failing to do the best thing for Paige. It is really hard to make an objective decision because of all the emotions and hormones involved with breastfeeding and i still really enjoy it, i'm just feeling a bit trapped by the fact that she is wholly dependent on me.

This thing should be easier since Paige is my 3rd baby but they are all so different. I'm just going to have to persevere to get her to take a bottle and maybe when i can leave her with someone for a couple of hours i'll start feeling a bit better, i don't have to give up bf completely just yet.

We are starting with rice cereal this week so hopefully this will help make the transition to bottle easier as well.

Thanks again for listening to my mad ravings, lol.

Shell

alioli123 · Apr 17, 2008 4:46AM

Shell, I enjoyed bf with Gracie but it was just so time-consumiung with having the boys too. Had she been my 1st, I don't know whether or not I'd be bf still, as I do think it restricts getting out, sleeping lol, relationship with hubby wink wink! etc. I would never feed in public so bottles after 2 months were ny lifeline, literally!
I'm sure you'll find a bottle or cup that Paige will like and like you say, you don't need to give up bf, just give yourself a well-deserved break.
Enjoy the baby rice feeding!
Ali x

Advice please?

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