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going out of my mind tonight :(
Oliver hasn't stopped screaming and feeding all night and hes routing about now for more... my nipples are sore and i don't think he's getting anything out of them anymore! I'm thinking formula top ups may be needed? anyone had this problem before/now?
I got a bit upset before because of my ex well... a lot upset. could me being stressed have affected him in some way? he's just crying and crying and im on my own n i just feel useless because i havent a clue why! I've changed him, give him his dummy, fed him loads of times, rocked the moses basket, put scratch mits on incase his hands r cold, held him, brought up his wind the lot and he wont settle for more than ten minutes! he was sick quite a lot today too... x
any sort of advice would be appreciated but just needed a bit of a moan tbh x
I got a bit upset before because of my ex well... a lot upset. could me being stressed have affected him in some way? he's just crying and crying and im on my own n i just feel useless because i havent a clue why! I've changed him, give him his dummy, fed him loads of times, rocked the moses basket, put scratch mits on incase his hands r cold, held him, brought up his wind the lot and he wont settle for more than ten minutes! he was sick quite a lot today too... x
any sort of advice would be appreciated but just needed a bit of a moan tbh x
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Replies
Thing to remember is you are doing a great job and he is learning all about you just as you are learning about him.
Just a few thoughts, didnt want to read and run though
Jules
This time round I have gone straight to bottle feeding and its worked for me.... try topping him up and see if it works for you
I had a lot of upset in my pregnancy too and I don't think my one is effected so am sure it won't have effected your little man either
Nites are the worst but they do get better hun
Jen xx
Keep the faith Luce, it's really hard the first few months and almost every mum on here will have times where things are really difficult and tbh all you can do is cry!!!!
Don't be thinking the stress you have had during your pregnancy is anything to do with how your wee one is.
Remember you are doing a brilliant job!!
Vicky xxxxxx
I haven't breastfed either of my 2 so don't know what it's like!!
Maybe try expressing a bit to see how much you are producing. You can't have sore boobies as that will make you tense anyway I would imagine!
You know your baby better than anyone and if you think a little formula will help then try it. You are doing so amazing on your own and I have nothing but respect for you.
Cheer up sweetie it will all be fine.
Xx
the health visitors would advise against it, but i have actually expressed milk for some feeds and also used nipple shields to try and help and it has given me a rest.
Can only imagine how hard it must be on your own!
Tonight is the third night of this... He was doing so well with his sleeping and only waking up once in the night for a feed... I don't know what's going on.
I expressed a bottle yesterday and my mum took him out for a bit so I could get some rest but it's not the same as sleeping at night time. It's so frustrating cause I try everything but nothing stops him from screaming! and during the day when someone could take him off me for a few hours or someone could take us out for a drive which calms him down a lot he's fine! he just seems to choose the times I'm alone with him to cry and act up.
Doesn't help that I try to talk to my friends about it and they say "awww cute!" CUTE? SERIOUSLY?!
or "im sure its not that bad"
and they all think I should be welcoming visitors with open arms all the time too... or making arrangements at certain times... I can't even guarantee I'll have slept by 10am so no I can't say I will definitely meet someone for coffee... or even lunch
I feel sooooo bad for moaning about all this when there are people that can't have children or that have lost theirs.
and dont get me wrong I love Oliver to pieces and I wouldn't change him. Things are just really getting me down. x
xx
Oliver knows you love him, and sod your 'friends' who can't empathise with you and expect you to be able to go for coffee and lunch! We all wanted our babies, but jeez these first few weeks are the toughest on the planet, eh? I'm dreading going back to work if the sleepless nights continue.
Have you tried music with Oliver? We went through a catalogue of music the other night and found that country music (???!!!) seems to soothe Mia...but now she's wise to that one and won't settle at all unless being cuddled, which of course means no sleep for us.
If you're really worried that he might be in pain or something, make sure you call your mw...you have access to them for 28 days after birth, I'm sure they would come round and help you. Please don't struggle on alone...and make sure you use us here....not much we can do except support you, but we are here for you..xxx
As far as making plans with people, dont worry that you cant commit. You will in time when you are able to. People will have to just accept it.
It could well be a growth spurt, like the other girls have suggested. These usually occur 7-10 days, 2-3 weeks, 4-6 weeks (and more later as well).
If he isnt taking a full feed ie around 40 mins then it could be that he is taking a lot more of the fore milk at each feed and not the hind milk. The fore milk is high in lactose and this can cause them pain. Are you switching sides during feeds? I had an unsettled night with Lili the other night and it was because she was having shorter feeds all day - she kept doing lots of explosive farts which were causing her pain as she was only really getting the fore milk. The next day I concentrated on the feeding and got back on track to 40 mins or longer on the one side and her pains disappeared and she was much more settled.
The only other thing I can think of from my own experience is the dreaded reflux. This can rear its ugly head from about 3-4wks of age. You mentioned Oliver had been quite sicky (though silent reflux can occur too which is without the sick). It might be worth checking if he is showing any signs of this as it can be really painful and they become really unsettled as a result. Take a look here:
http://www.huggies.com.au/baby-care/health/reflux/symptoms
You are doing a fabulous job so take a moment to pat yourself on the back. There will be tough days but they wont last forever, i promise you that.
xx
Off load on us as much as you want as long as it helps you xx
Jen x
Try buying Lansinoh from boots, (in purple tube), it worked wonders for me, and made feeding much easier and you don't hsve to worry about wiping it off before you feed.
You are doing the best job in the world - you've carried and now given birth to a miracle. I hope my hugs find their way to you xxx
I do feel much better during the day it's just I feel more alone at night even though I suppose that doesn't make much sense :S
Hope all of you are okay and babies are doing fine!
Luce and Oliver 3 weeks today x
I think its because everyone else is asleep and your not! although I love my bubba I can't help but hanker after those sleep filled nites!
My oh has started taking it in turns with me so I can get some sleep, I know you are on your own but maybe you could ask your mum to do the odd nite for you while you are there to give you some sleep as its amazing how much easier everything seems if you have had some decent kip
Jen xx
Lorelei was bf but still had problems with colic and reflux- it was so upsetting trying to get someone to listen to us I remember as we were told everything from it being too early to bf babies don't get colic and even 'babies do cry you know' from a 10 year old looking health visitor who was lucky not to leave my house with a black eye I tell you So I can totally sympathise.
I did have dude but he worked away all week so was on my own a lot and to be honest the best way I personally learnt to deal with it was to accept it on a day-to-day basis. I didn't clockwatch, I didn't plan too much because I really just slept when she did and if that meant sitting up until 7am then sleeping most the day then so be it. I found it best not to think about how long she'd been crying or feeding cos it made me more upset, I just played music, tried to comfort her and sat refuelling on treats whilst she fed for what seemed an eternity. Basically just work out your own routine and let others work to it.
I'm not sure how this would suit you, just wanted to let you know that I understand. It really won't last forever and you most defintely haven't done anything to cause it- I see your fb updates and you couldn't be prouder or more loving of your wee man it's so obvious, he knows it believe me x
Just wanted to add my good wishes and a big hug to this thread hun. Haven't been on much in the last couple of weeks myself for similar reasons and I completely admire you for doing this by yourself. Except you're not by yourself hun, there are a whole load of us on here supporting you and we're here whenever you need us. I've been doing quite a lot of marathon night-time feeds myself (I have a new nikckname - Moo as in Daisy the Cow!) and know how lonely things can be at 3am. Sometimes I log in here so if you can please do and we can chat together.
Babysteps + Lottie
3 weeks old today xx