Coping - advice please?

Louisewoowoo · Nov 25, 2008 5:11PM

Sorry ladies to put a downer on anyone but just these last few weeks Im really struggling, I think its mainly due to the fact he doesnt sleep last night he was up every 40 mins and wanted to get up at half 4 its always the same and ive tried everything, ive tried to speak to hubby but he just dismisses it saying im doing fine but I feel so weepy and then so angry at everything.

Ive tried to talk to my family but there view is and always has been you made the decision to live down there so theres not a lot we can do - they live in manchester

Ive spoke to the doc and hv about his sleeping and they suggested a few things which ive tried and literally just said I have to deal with it

Sorry to dump this on you ladies its just I havent really got anyone else to speak to about it, I think i just needed to let it out and have a little cry sorry I sound so melodramatic just lack of sleep I think

thanks for listening

xxx

karen130770 · Nov 25, 2008 11:00AM

Babes, this is one thing I do know about! Ive got to go get Jules now but I'll be back later and post properly! xx

JunieMummy · Nov 25, 2008 11:03AM

oh babe know wonder u feel the way you do.

I know what you mean by feeling angry and weepy - I can switch from 1 to the next in minutes lately - My 22 month old wakes in the night out of pain/discomfort but also habit!! Then I have a 5 month old to get up to aswel who thinks morning time is 5 am!! So Im lucky if I have 5 hours sleep and its always broken sleep at least 3 times.

How are you feeding LO?

Would you consider medised? Ive never used it but I think Tammi has. it might help with the sleeping.

Sorry im not much help but Im here if you wanna talk

Elaine xx

Louisewoowoo · Nov 25, 2008 11:08AM

He is on 3 meals and 5 bottles of formula, he is never hungry in the night just wakes, ive left him to whinge but he is resentless!!
I dont really know anything about medised, what is it??

Thanks for reply though just feel so miserable

tamarabell · Nov 25, 2008 12:07PM

Hi Lande, sorry to hear that you are feeling so down. We went through a really bad patch with Ashton not sleeping at all, was up every hour and think it was as he was teething and also full of cold! I spoke to my doctor about it as I was so tired and got medised for him, There is alot of controversy (sp) about it as some people use it to sedate their children! It contains paracetomol and also something to help them breathe more easily. I gave Ashton it for a week, just 2.5mls before bed and agin if he woke with a tempreture and he has since started sleeping alot better at night. I basically think it just helped to get him back into the routine of sleeping. Last night he still woke (full of cold again) but he only needed a little cuddle and then fell back alseep.

Also where does your son sleep? My hv advised not to bring baby in with us as its a habit then can be hard to break once started, but to move the cot right up next to your bed so that it seems to baby as if they are sleeping with you, you can either do it with the side of the cot down or take it off if it is at the same height as your bed. I did this for the first time last night, and it was so much easier as I could stroke his hair and pop his dummy back in when needed without actually having to get up, so although he was still awake, I felt that I had a better night.

And remember we are all here for you babe, post as many times as you need too!!! xxxxxxx

Louisewoowoo · Nov 25, 2008 12:23PM

Thanks

He is next to my bed in his cot with the side down, tried putting him in his own room but it didnt help so moved him back!

Thanks for support x

karen130770 · Nov 25, 2008 3:39PM

Hi babes

Firstly, I know how you feel aswell - I got so down a few weeks ago I posted on BE as I was getting so peed off - I've got a mil round the corner who never comes to help, a friend up the road who wasn't doing anything to help and I was at the end of my tether.

I also felt completely stupid because at 38 and having had 4 kids I really should be able to cope by now.

The only thing that I can honestly say has helped is getting Reiss to sleep better during the day. He was catnapping for around 15 -20 minutes at a time and he was so hard to get to sleep it was stupid.

Not sure what Evan's sleep patterns like? Does he sleep loads or not enough? Both of these can cause problems. Doesn't sound as though food's the problem either.

Reiss has also had a problem with his teeth for around 2 weeks now. He's been dribblng and not feeding properly, he's bf so I don't even know what he's getting, which was adding to the problem.

I started to put teething gel on before he went to bed and if he was really whingeing before bed (hard to tell the difference between pain and tiredeness with Reiss) I would give him calpol before bed. Like Tammi said, medised wouldn't hurt him, you're not going to give it longterm or anything so it might be just enough to settle him enough.

As for the cot thing, I had Reiss in his cot right next to me with the side removed as he was waking up so much, so I could just lay right next to him and grab him if necessary.

I moved his cot to the other side of the room so he could still hear us but he didn't wake up every time I moved.

As for the sleeping during the daytime I have only just started addressing this but already it's made a difference.

I realised that actually, he needs routine! Sounds simple, but I hadn't realised how much different he would be with it. It's meant me sacrificing coffee meet ups, going shopping all day etc, but Reiss is one of those babies that needs his sleep times to be set for him sort of thing. If he's in his buggy he sleeps and wakes up so often he's not really getting proper sleep.

So, I come in from dropping Jules to school, and put him in his cot to sleep. After a bf and then lunch he goes back down in the afternoon and that's enough to see him through to bedtime at 7pm. He's like a different kid. I've really learned to recognise when he's tired and needs to go down. He does sometimes cry, but it's much easier to leave him to cry for a while during the day than the night time and he does settle.

That was such an essay - sorry for anone having the misfortune to read this and I hope it occasionally makes some sense!

BTW after telling my friend straight that I needed help, she came round a couple of times to take him out for an hour, hasn't been back to do it recently though and my mil appeared once never to be seen again!

Oh, I know what else - what area of London do you live? I meet up with another lady in Brent X sometimes for lunch if you fancy it?xx

Louisewoowoo · Nov 25, 2008 4:38PM

Thanks Karen, I think it may be his day naps, I think its because its not always consistent in the afternoon, he always has an hour at 9am but the afternoon its hit and miss and he will only sleep in his cot so if I want to go out he wont sleep, think I will just have to set a time and stay in for him to sleep.

I live in Victoria so not to far from Brent x I think - not sure though, but would be nice to meet!

My family dont help though as I know I made the decision to move but they are just crap with support!!!
I do the bonjela and calpol thing, I mentioned to the doc about the medised but he point blank refused to give it

karen130770 · Nov 25, 2008 5:09PM

lol - oh great! Can't you buy medised over the counter?

Victoria is probably only about 5 miles from Brent X but in London traffic is probaby an hour! Actually really not sure - let me know if you fancy meeting up though and we can have a moan about our families/boys whatevers!xx

tamarabell · Nov 25, 2008 5:11PM

Lande if you want to try medised I know there are some chemists such as boots that won't sell it, however I know people who have got it from independant chemists or you will just have to say you have a child who is over 2. xxx

Coping - advice please?

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