🚨 Advance warning 🚨 This forum will be closing on 1st May – please see our pinned thread for more information.
Options
Has anyone not had a night off yet?
Just wondering as I havent had anyone babysit Brody of an evening, or even during the day for that matter, except hubby. Ive been out 1 night without him in the 6+ months and it felt weird leaving him behind with hubby - and he had a nightmare night I might add (that was last weekend when his unsettledness started).
Anyway, we are due to visit our family up north at the end of the month and MIL is already asking to babysit him one night. I immediately said NO to hubby!! Am I being too protective?
Only minutes before he was on the phone to her when she mentioned it to him, we were talking about the night we have planned to get together with our mates (one couple with a 20 month old, 1 couple due in august, and 2 childless unmarried couples still in the honeymoon phase). One of the childless girls is talking about us going out instead of us all staying together and having a meal in together after putting the boys down, and if we can get a babysitter and I said to hubby I thought at first we could get his MIL to come round while we were out, then go home when we get back but I just feel too uncomfortable (or untrusting??) - I fear that if he wakes (which he has been lately when he falls onto his back and is too sleepy/lazy/?? to roll back on his side) then she will just keep him up. Which means he will get a crap night's sleep and we will pay for it the rest of the night.
I guess Im worried more cos she has whinged to me before about her other daughter-IL telling her what to do when she looks after her kids. I feel like I would need to do the same if I let her have him!!
Am I being too controlling? Or is it my right to decide when I feel is the right time to let him be babysat?
Has anyone else still not left their baby with anyone overnight or part of a night?
x
[Modified by: sim75 on 05 June 2010 12:21:57 ]
Anyway, we are due to visit our family up north at the end of the month and MIL is already asking to babysit him one night. I immediately said NO to hubby!! Am I being too protective?
Only minutes before he was on the phone to her when she mentioned it to him, we were talking about the night we have planned to get together with our mates (one couple with a 20 month old, 1 couple due in august, and 2 childless unmarried couples still in the honeymoon phase). One of the childless girls is talking about us going out instead of us all staying together and having a meal in together after putting the boys down, and if we can get a babysitter and I said to hubby I thought at first we could get his MIL to come round while we were out, then go home when we get back but I just feel too uncomfortable (or untrusting??) - I fear that if he wakes (which he has been lately when he falls onto his back and is too sleepy/lazy/?? to roll back on his side) then she will just keep him up. Which means he will get a crap night's sleep and we will pay for it the rest of the night.
I guess Im worried more cos she has whinged to me before about her other daughter-IL telling her what to do when she looks after her kids. I feel like I would need to do the same if I let her have him!!
Am I being too controlling? Or is it my right to decide when I feel is the right time to let him be babysat?
Has anyone else still not left their baby with anyone overnight or part of a night?
x
[Modified by: sim75 on 05 June 2010 12:21:57 ]
0
Replies
I really struggle to leave them with anyone. I am hoping it will get easier when they get bigger I just feel so respnsible for them at the moment.
[Modified by: wilmie on June 05, 2010 12:59 PM]
Bit the same here really .... Definitely not left Freddie over night in fact have rarely left him at all!
OH has him while I'm at the hairdressers - so that's 2 hours every 6 weeks, my friend took him for a walk about 6 weeks ago - that was half an hour and apart from that my mum's babysat for us twice. Once at her house while we were all staying there - OH and I went out to celebrate our engagement - I fed and settled Freddie before we left and we weren't even gone 2 hours and I hate to admit I didn't really enjoy it as I was too worried about Freddie waking up and us not being there! The other time we dragged mum to a hotel in Liverpool - same again I fed and settled Freddie and mum sat in our hotel room in the dark watching the tv on low while we went to a gig - we were out 4 hours. She had lists of instructions re bottles of EBM, nappy changing, keeping him up etc etc
I honestly didn't think I'd be this protective!! Thought I'd be glad of some time out ...
Supposed to be going to the cinema with friends but Freddie's nights are so erratic just now that I keep postponing cos when he wakes he wants mummy cuddles and it's not fair to him or OH if I go out if there's just going to be lots of distress
So no I guess I don't think you''re being too controlling cos let's face it - if you are so am I!!!
xx
He wont stay overnight with them now though, as he's in a routine which we've tried really hard to stick to, my friends rarely have their own baby for a full week, for example she gave her to her mum yesterday and is not getting her back until tomorrow. personally i think its wrong, as she's only 9 months old....
Sarah
We have accepted we wont be able to leave her with anyone till she's much older and she's too unsettled to be left and I wouldnt enjoy myself. We are going on a cruise soon with a night nursery where nursery trained staff watch them and buzz you if they wake up, hoping like mad she'll sleep there so we can have some time for a meal etc for the first time x
Inka xxx
Im pleased that by him going to others he isn't too clingy and is a very happy sociable boy. But to be fair he may have been that way anyway and he's still a little mummys boy
Sim if you don't want to leave him don't hun, only do that when you feel ready!
xxx
He doesnt really know MIL as only met her twice so far since we dont live where they do. Even my mum, who was there for the birth and a few weeks after, and he has met once and again now that she is here for the weekend, he was hesitant at first this time round with all the attention.
I think if it were any babysitter, or a friend, I wouldnt hesitate to tell them exactly what to do and insist that they do it to a T (probably write it all down too!!
I feel better knowing Im not the only one who doesnt want to leave them yet. Especially if they are going through an unsettled phase overnight. Im so strict on the no-talking/interacting and getting him back to sleep immediately in the dark of his room if he wakes any time after going down. It took hubby ages to understand it even! If this is not followed he will wake up properly and want to play.
I dont think I could relax either to go out and would have a much more relaxed evening in. Right, Im decided then, going to get on to my friends and tell them back to plan A.
Our 2nd anniversary is coming up and I want to go the ballet so I am a bit worried about it. Also my 29th birthday and my brother's 18th birthday is 19th July and I want to go out for a meal but it means that I would have to take her with us as well because inlaws would be away.
Em xxx
Was trying yo get out of there for days but they wouldn't let me. Hubby did sooo well and then my mum arrived. I'm now at home and feel a bit redundant (still can't do anything, in toe to thigh plaster) but at least i can cuddle her, feed her and kiss her now.
MJx