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What would you do?
I am very broody and have been for a year or so and really would like some outside opinions on our choices and what would be for the best. For background: I'm 30; hubby and I overseas but want to move back to the UK in the next 12-18 months once we have saved enough for a home there (it will take at least that long to save up so can't move any sooner realistically); my BMI for the last few years has been 27-29 which is high and I gained a LOT of weight since the start of this year which means my BMI has shot up to 33 which is awful and I'd need to lose about 3-4 stone to get in the 'healthy' range at least; my own mother, her mother and apparently her sisters all went through menopause early at around 40 or a bit before; I told my doctor and she recommended I start trying BY 31-31.5yrs (ie before or around or uk move timeframe).
I keep going over and over the option (having baby here then moving, waiting until get to uk, etc) and it's driving me crazy. I don't want to wait because I am worried I will miss the boat entirely give all the family history but on the otherhand we need to get settled in UK (esp me in job and for long enough that I will get SMP, etc and maybe even be able to return PT). If hubby gets okay job I think we could manage without SMP if careful though if I don't have job it would mess up our mortgage opportunities. Plus I am overweight so that would make pregnancy difficult right now. But I really don't want to wait and have all that in place and then find out I waited too long and can't conceive at all!
Also hubby and I had decided late last year that we'd start TTC in Dec2011 and we were very happy with that. But this year we decided we really want to move back to the UK so all our plans have changed as you can see! Now I am so confused. Hubby is conflicted too because I keep bringing it up and he is focusing on our savings and having a secure future for us.
What would you do if you were me?
I keep going over and over the option (having baby here then moving, waiting until get to uk, etc) and it's driving me crazy. I don't want to wait because I am worried I will miss the boat entirely give all the family history but on the otherhand we need to get settled in UK (esp me in job and for long enough that I will get SMP, etc and maybe even be able to return PT). If hubby gets okay job I think we could manage without SMP if careful though if I don't have job it would mess up our mortgage opportunities. Plus I am overweight so that would make pregnancy difficult right now. But I really don't want to wait and have all that in place and then find out I waited too long and can't conceive at all!
Also hubby and I had decided late last year that we'd start TTC in Dec2011 and we were very happy with that. But this year we decided we really want to move back to the UK so all our plans have changed as you can see! Now I am so confused. Hubby is conflicted too because I keep bringing it up and he is focusing on our savings and having a secure future for us.
What would you do if you were me?
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Replies
One thing is things are rarely all perfect. The problem is that if you wait to come back to the UK and get a job you would then have to wait till you would get your SMP etc. If you could do it without needing the money maybe that is the thing to do...but...if you are having to save to get back to the UK you don't want to put extra pressure on yourself!
It's very difficult...I responded partly because I didn't want to read and run. Really you have to think about how it works for you
ps: good luck with your hmrc fight