I missed my period but took a test results were neg

hello well let me start off by saying I have 2 kids but re married 8 yes. Ago and we decided to add on to our blended family.. on June 13 I had a tubal reversal in Houston by Dr. Bernard Rosenfeld there team was awesome.. Any ways my youngest is 12.. So we TTC since last week of august.. Well its been like 4 months first 2months I was like let me test , me test each time being neg. Then last month I was 4 days late. N my dreams were shattered when I began to spot then the flood came.. I cried and cried... Now I know its been very little time n it doesn't happen right away in my situation it takes any where from 6 months to 1 &1/2. OK this month I'm 6 days late but I have tested and it was neg.  a week b4 it was due I felt the usual little pinches bloating tender breast grumpy. OK so I'm like this is norm. But period never came.. I'm probably jinksing myself but n e who on the 19 it never came I'm like OK it'll come don't want to get excited cuz I don't want to cry again I felt so disappointed . I was like I'm just gunna exercise and try to lose weight.. So I been ignoreing it but it sits on the back of my mind wheres my period if I'm not pregnant..