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Wasn't TTC but after a "scare" I realised how much I want a baby!

Hi, im pretty new to this but i wanted some advice and comfort.

I came off the pill about 2 years ago and have a very regular 29 day cycle. Me and my fiance weren't TTC but figured that we were in a comfortable position if it did happen so haven't been using protection (but not tracking ovulation etc and not purposely TTC).

AF was due last Monday 22/06 but never arrived (very unusual) so i held out a few days before trying a HPT. It came back negative, but i was still convinced I was pregnant. At this point i wasn't bothered either way. I knew i wanted children at some point in my life but wasn't sure when. I told my fiance that i thought i may be pregnant and he was over the moon. I also told my parents who were very excited even though i explained that i was testing negative.

I had various other symptoms like i broke out in very bad spots, feeling sickly throughout the day and feeling very bloated.

So yesterday my mum bought me a First Response HPT and again it came back negative... a few hours later, AF arrived and it felt like my whole world had fallen apart. I haven't stopped crying since. Crying for a baby that i'd lost, that never even existed. I'm an emotion wreck. I never realised how much i wanted this baby that id  convinced myself i was carrying.

I have now convinced myself that we cant have babies as we haven't got caught in the two years that we havent been using protection.

Im driving myself mad. Has anyone else been through something similar? Xx

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