My head is such a mess!

Hi girls, I'm nearly 17 weeks and as you know my waters broke with Ian at 19+1 so I knew this period would be hard for me! My dad passed away very suddenly without much warning on tuesday and the funeral is this coming fri and it's made me worse! My head is a complete mess! I've been waking up between 1am and 4am and just laying there convincing myself that I'm going to loose this baby or crying about my dad, I don't think I'm depressed as normally I'm quite a positive person it's just at night and the odd moment during the day I have these feeling about baby, obviously I'm devastated at loosing my dad so it's not helped me to feel positive about this pregnancy! Just need to snap out of it! Any advice on how to do this? Xxx


  • Hi there, i'm new to this site, I just joined last wk! I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. Life is very cruel and I sometimes wonder what the next blow is going to be. I think night time is the worst, the house is quiet and if you can't sleep then all you can think of is whats happening in your life, and usually bad thoughts and not good ones!!
    Like yourself i'm a positive person but you've just lost your Dad so you are going to be feeling even more vulnerable.
    I feel exactly the same as you regarding my un-born baby. I'm 18wks pregnant after losing my little boy Ryan at the end of Sept last year. He died when I was 38wks pregnant. I am constantly fearing the worst and just can't believe everything will be ok this time around.
    I think you are being harsh on yourself saying you need to snap out of it. You are grieving for your Dad, and coping with a pregnancy after losing your baby. I think once you get past the period where you lost Ian you might feel better. I hope so anyway.
    I would love to say stay positive but I wouldn't be practising what I preach. It's just so hard and the only real solution unfortunately is time.
    Take care, look after yourself, Luv Kathryn xxx
  • Hi Kathryn, thanks for your lovely reply! I'm so sorry to hear about your little boy, life really is so unfair at times! And your right maybe I should be less harsh on myself I'm just so desperate to hold this baby in my arms, I'm sure you know how I feel! Let's hope we both get the endings we deserve! Xxx
  • ah chick i'm so sorry about yr dad , but he wouldnt want u to stress yr self out so much , just give yrself time to grieve yr dad,
    i am totally with u and yr fear i'm the same i'm 23 wks now and get more scared every day , dont be hard on yrself u have been threw huge amounts and yr doing yr best take yr time yr being as strong as u can at the moment , take care hunnie always here for a chat xx
  • Hi Becky,
    It will take time to deal with your sadness of losing your dad & work past your worries about losing your new baby. Maybe your dad will be watching over you, the new baby & Ian? keeping you all safe.
    We're all here for you if you need us. Sorry lifes been so difficult for you just now x
  • Hi Becky,
    I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad, I lost mine 13 years ago now and i still miss him with all my heart. You shouldn't put pressure on yourself to snap out it and you should take each day as it comes. Just think your Dad is up there now looking after Ian and he'll be looking down on you and your new little one. I'm only 10 weeks, got 17 to go before i get to the point i lost Ewan and I know i'll be posting a similar post to this when my time comes. You're only human and have every right to be feeling the way you do. You'll be in my thoughts on Friday and i hope the sun shines down on you and your family on the day. Remember the things you loved about your Dad and he will always be with you xx
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