First time mums: What you need to know!

Back in January (2018) I gave birth to my first via c-section as he was a huge 11lb 2oz. I now find myself with a 4 month old and pregnant again! Below I have complied a list of all the advice I received first time round that really helped me. Please please remember to take every piece of advice as just that (including the points below). There is no set way to do this, what works for one mum will not work for another, you need to decide what is best for you and your family. 

Please pop back here once you have had your baby(s) to add the best advice you received.

* Try your best not to eat for two, you may regret having to try and loose the extra weight once baby is here. 

* If you can, do some sort of exercise, swimming is a good one. I was at the gym at week 34 and squatting really really helped once my Chunk arrived. Being able to sit just using my leg muscles made a huge difference.

* The maternity clothes you buy will still be used once the little one is here. (4 months on I'm still in maternity wear.)

* Invest in a comfy pair of slip on shoes suitable for the winter (Dolly shoes mean cold feet) when your bump is big you wont be able to reach your feet to tie laces and getting socks on is a struggle.

* When it is close to baby being born stock your freezer with home cooked meals, this will make life so much easier in the first few weeks and save your bank from too many takeouts.

* Don't go out and buy lots of clothes, save your pennies for the bigger things as most family and friends will get 0-3 for you. I didnt need to buy any 0-3 or 3-6. Those dungarees and dresses might look amazing but they are a nightmare to get on and off and make nappy changes tricky. Sleep suits for the win!

* Pushchair shopping, think about where you will use it. Will you need a fixed front wheel or swivel. 3 wheels or 4 wheels. How easy it is to fold one handed. What is the sun canopy like. How much are all the optional extras ie rain cover, car seat. Where will you store it? Does it fit in your car or easy to get on a bus? Also pick one you like early on, then you have a few months to hunt for a second hand one or wait for the sales which usually come round every 3-4 months.

* When you have visitors, you need to learn to be a bit forward. If you are not up for company tell them and arrange a different time, Ask them to leave if it is too much for you. When they offer help take it and tell them what they can do there and then ie, could you wizz the hoover round please, can you load/unload the washing machine or do the dishes please. Dont let them hold the baby while you run around doing things. You need to relax and take care of yourself so you can look after your baby. 

* Check your local area for Bump groups, its great to get to know a few people local to you that will have babies around the same age. Mush is a great app where you can meet/chat to local mums and find out about baby groups and other mums to be. Home Start is a charity that run groups, (bump start, best start and mothers in mind) I have found these soo helpful when I struggled with anxiety.

Remember to shout if you have any questions, there is no such thing as a stupid question (especially now you have baby brain, this doesnt go away either) the birth group on here was brilliant support for me. There are a lot of highs and a few lows on this journey, we need to support each other, no judgement or competition. 

I hope this helps, Please add your own advice below. :-)

Posts

  • You're spot on about saying no to visitors - used to really stress me out when my baby arrived and cause all sorts of anxiety, so do say no!

    And deffo free batch cooked meals before baby comes too - i did this and it really did help. 

    Maternity style Yoga pants - never done a day of yoga in my life, but they were the most comfy bottoms throughout my pregnancy, and same as you, i wore them for months afterwards. 

    And i'd add, remember what works for one baby might not work for yours, so for my second baby swaddling really helped, but not for my first. Also my first adored a dummy, my second didn't take at all. 

  • Completely agree with being forward with visitors - if people ask if they can bring/do anything then it's always a yes! I wish I'd traded baby cuddles for chores (they could have cuddles if they run the Hoover round lol!) 

    My other advice would be to ignore other peoples advice if you want to - seeing my mother in law tell my sister in law that if she held her newborn baby girl too much shed 'regret it' in future and to 'leave her to learn to sleep on her own' broke my heart when I saw my sister in law practically sitting on her hands trying not to pick up her own week old baby! All those missed baby snuggles! 

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