difficult baby or just bad parenting ?

Hi Ladies

We are going through a paticularly difficult patch with Tyler (8 months ) at the moment, he's teething and in alot of pain. When he's occupied he forgets about the pain but when its nap or bed time its a nightmare, we were up all night last night with him, gave him meds, bonjela but nothing helped. Tonight looks like its the same thing, i honestly dont know what to do. I cant get him to sleep, i cant let him cry as i dont believe in this (no offence to anyone who does this) and it makes him very very sick. So I spend ages getting him to sleep, 30 mins later he wakes screaming with his hands in his mouth. I've given him all i can for pain relief, what more can i do. I feel like such a failure and a night with no sleep does not help.

Anyone have any words of wisdom ??



  • a cool teether from the fridge, cucumber is meant to be really good. have u tried calpol? silly question i know! The only other thing i can suggest is dentinox teething gel, u can apply to gums every 20 mins instead of 3 hrs. must be painful for them, i know what its like with a wisdom tooth.

    Hope you get some sleep and that he does too, not much help really, sorry xx
  • Again, you've probably tried this but I find neurofen for children good and more effective than calpol. Ashton & Parsons Teething granules too? Hope he settles well soon for you xx
  • Sorry to G/C when my dd was teething we swore by ashtons and parsons powders or the teetha granuals....they both seemed to calm her and my sister has gone on to use them and love them


    x x
  • Hey hun

    Are you sure its just teething and not an ear infection? Its just you say he is worse at bed/nap time... well ear infection hurt a hell of a lot more when you lay down.

    I had this problem with my dd, fine during the day (ish) but screaming in pain at night, i put it down to teething for about 2 weeks until i thought this isnt right and took her to the Drs and turns out she has ear infection in both ears !! Poor little thing i felt awful image Calpol doesn't touch the pain ear infections give.. a simple anti biotic cleared it up.

    Sorry if you have already been to the Dr just thought i would throw this in just in case xx
  • Oh what a shame for the little man. Ice is a really great way of soothing the gums..I used to run ice across my ds gums and it really helped. When he's really upset I lay him on my bed and lie next to him till he falls asleep then I move him afterwards

    honestly - everything goes out the window when it comes to teething. There's no way my routine works during it so I wouldn't stress too much he's just in pain and it's deffo not bad parenting! Is it the molars because I've heard they're the most painful.

    You can give nurofen and calpol because one is para and the other brufen...that might be worth a shot?

    I hope he feels better soon x
  • Hey hun,

    you are doing all you can, Olivia has been a nightmare teether and we still dont have any teeth but we use neurofen and anbesol and this really helps ease the pain xxxx
  • Oh you poor thing - we have these toy plastic keys which are filled with gel. You put them in the freezer and they go nice and hard and cold (but not unbearably icy cold) and stay that way for longer than normal ice would. Someone gave them to me as a present but I've seen them in Boots I think.

    Good luck and hope things improve soon!

    C image
  • Try nurofen instead or as well as calpol. I had a teething brush that he loved.

    But agree with Mrs NoName, could be ear infection. My lo had this and was much worse when we lay him down, even for nappy changes. S x
  • We have the nuby keys we also have teething teddys and they go in the freezer he LOVES them. We do neurofen and calpol together plus teething granules.

    How was last night?

    In terms of your topic title Sarah your a wonderful parent

  • Hi All

    Thanks for your responses, bit of an update:
    Last night was no better, when he's distracted he's fine but when its nap or bedtime its chaotic. Last night he went down like a dream at 7 after some calpol, 8 he was back up. After a cuddle he was back down, then up again at 1 when he was awake for 2 hours, in this time I tried a dummy and a teething dummy with bonjela on (he's never had a dummy), had his bum changed, had a bottle and I must have walked miles upstairs soothing him. At 3am he dropped off, then woke at 6.30am. He's gone to nursery, he doesn't have a temp but has had more calpol as he's still in pain. Just rang nursery and they said he's not his usual happy self, his teeth are bothering him and he's just had a nap. I've booked today off on leave, hubs took him to nursery and we both went back to bed for a while which we desperately needed. I'm in work again tomorrow so am hoping that tonight is better. I'm taking him to docs this afternoon just to make sure its not his ears as mum noticed his one ear was red yesterday but he had only just woke up and i think he was resting on it.
    Last night it really dawned on us how clueless we are, nothing i was doing would stop him crying, i even climbed in his cot with him to see if this would help. Feel so helpless as he's in so much pain, he's had all the meds he can but nothing touches it. I didn't know you could give calpol and ibuprofen at the same time. Its the top teeth on their way, he already has his bottom ones.

  • oh dear lilykit im so sorry you feel that way but seriously dont worry it will get better. Its not that you dont know what to do its just youve never been in that position before so its a learning curve. I would personally use both calpol and neurofen and see if that helps.

    Another point to add is that my ds wakes up during the night when hes teething but its mainly because he is hungry as due to teething hes not eating as much during the day. Ive put another bottle in his daily routine and this has settled him down as his tummy is fuller. Maybe you should try that? I know it seems like youre going backwards but for the time being it may help? soup for dinner too so he doesnt have to chew, or scrambled egg or something..maybe even try giving him some toast to hold and munch down on himself? This does help me I find.

    let us know how you get on at the doctors.

  • try these beads you put them out in the sun to charge and when the baby wears them they release a natural remedy, my godson wears theses an doesnt moan at all when hes got them on...
  • Brody now has 6 and out of all of those the top 2 were THE worst. They took 6 weeks of pain and bad nights for him and we were a wreck - most of that time I had him on my own too!! Definately go for both calpol and nurofen but try to space them so that you always have one on the go as the dosage times are different for each of them. Id also use the teething powders (I use Nelsons which contains camomilla, not sure what's in the Ashton and Parsons?? if different you could use both), plus bongela and the teething amber beads. Along with the teething rings/keys and lots of cuddles Im not sure there in much more you can do. Ride it out hon, when Brody's top ones finally came through he was so much better. And the fangs, although they followed close after the top ones, have not even come close to that amount of trauma!!

    I hope they come through real soon, big hugs to you. And no way is it bad parenting... dont worry I too thought the very same thing a few weeks back when I was sleep deprived going through it with him!! When they teeth everything goes out the window xx
  • Please don't feel like it's anything you are or aren't doing - it is all just down to luck - just because someone has an angel baby it doesn't mean they are doing a better job than someone who has a difficult one - it is all down to the personality of the baby.

    Benjamin is only 16 weeks & hasn't started teething yet but my friend freezes breastmilk and makes little ice cubes which she puts on her daughters gums when she is in pain (not straight from the freezer) (along with ashtons etc.) - not sure if you are FFing but you could maybe use formula if you are.. A couple of friends also think the amber teething necklaces are really good. Hope things get better soon x
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