why do i feel so guilty

i have been looking for a full time job for a couple of days now and i have an interview on tuesday (my first interview in 3 years..eek!) anyway, for some reason i am feeling very guilty about the fact that lo who is 8 months old nearly, will be in nursary full time. i feel like it makes me a bad mum or im just shipping him off...
i need to work full time because we are struggling financially and i want to get out the house and do something new. i am trying to think positive, like how it will be good for him to interact with other babies and children etc. has anyone else felt like this? i know im not a bad mum so why do i feel so guilty?


  • hi honey!!
    DO NOT feel guilty! what you have to remember is that you will be miserable if you are in financial trouble - you and the kids wont be able to go anywhere, get cabin fever, then feel like launching them through the window! the stress from no money (especially with the way everything is going up at the moment) will put added stress on your family unit, and it is not worth it.
    when things settle, you may be able to reduce your hours, but in the mean time, the time you will have with your kids will be quality time - because, lets be honest, you can take them for granted at times, cant you!!
    i have got 3, last one 8 months old and have just got back on 1 bank night shift a week, until i star back properly in july on 2 shifts. my dad keeps telling me i should be full time mum "when we had you, mum didnt work........."!, but with the rising cost of living, the need for a decent car that fits 3 car seats in etc, i need to work. plus, i've worked damn hard for what i have, and i feel that it is actually a bit of 'me' time!!!
    as for nursey, i'm sure he'll be fine - like you said, the interaction with other kids, different carers, can help give them a good base for when they start full time school! dont beat yourself up - you are doing the right thing!
    Good luck on Tue, and keep us posted!
    nicki xxx
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