Breastfeeding - I can't take the pain anymore

MumMum3000 · Feb 15, 2013 6:53PM

Hi everyone,

I think the hormones are kicking in hard core today!
My baby is only 3 days old and have struggled a bit with breastfeeding but have had a lot of support from midwives etc on how to get her to latch on etc. I thought I was doing ok but i'm just in so much pain. My milk started coming in yesterday too so that probably doesn't help but it just hurts so much.

I was feeding my baby earlier today when she pulled off and I saw my nipple was bleeding, alot. Then I winded her and she was sick and there was alot of blood in it. I burst into tears as I felt so awful.

I was really considering putting her onto formula but haven't yet. I expressed a bottle this morning as my boobs were so full and ended up giving it to hear for her next feed as I couldn't stand it. Because of that my boobs are like rocks as she didn't feed from them last time. I hope this is making sense!

I'm about to go for a bath and have bought some gel pads so will put those on after but my baby will need feeding again at 7.30pm and i'm dreading it.

I feel like such a failure. All I have to do is feed her and I already want to give in. I'm crying as i'm writting this as wish I wasn't such a wimp.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? If so what did you do and if you put your baby onto formula, did you really regret it and feel bad or was it the right decision.

I don't have a problem with formula at all, so don't know why i'm feeling like this. Probably the hormones!

Thank you for reading this,

Amy xxxxxxxxxxx

linzimc88 · Mar 9, 2008 2:26PM

you don't realise how hard bf is until your having to do it and it can put you under so much pressure. i wasn't quite in the same boat as you, but my LO just would not latch on. i tried constantly for 3days and all she could manage was a lick and a slobber! i did get lots of help but she was starving so i ended up expressing every feed for her for the first month and a half ish. after then it was way too time consuming to be expressing all of the time and so i changed to part formula and would alternate feeds, and gradually after 2 and a half months my milk started to dry up because of using my boobs less and less. i think i gave it the best shot i possibly could have and so feel fine about it. my boobs were also very very sore and what i found helped was soaking breast pads (i found tommee tippee ones the best by far) under the tap and freezing them in freezer bags, then when nice and hard i just slipped them in my bra, it was heaven. because those pads are so absorbant, even when they melted a bit no water actually came out of them so i didnt get wet at all, and the relief was brill. so definately give that a try. there are special nipple creams you can get, and also nipple shields are brill, i had a go with these a few times. they basically stick onto your boob and have a teat part which goes over your nipple with a hole in and your baby latches onto that rather than your skin. that may help loads for you? what i'd say though is persevere as best you can but really don't beat yourself up if you choose formula instead, im sure your LO would rather have a happy comfy mammy and a nice full tummy than you feeling stressed/guilty about it all. good luck though hun, hope i've not waffled on! xxx

hushpuppy · Mar 9, 2008 2:28PM

It sounds like hormones to me!! I would sit on my chair bf Poppy and I would be in tears! She wasn't very good at latching onto my left boob (mw said it was a funny shape?!) so I found it much easier to feed from the right which made my nipple crack and bleed. I used Lansinoh cream and it was a godsend. I ended up giving in as Poppy was a big baby and with her latching on problems she was never really satisfied. I started to express rather than feed from the breast and it started to reduce my supply rapidly so that didn't help either. If you really want to continue to bf, buy some of that cream and you should feel a difference quickly. I wish I hadn't given up quite so easily but like I said she wasn't happy and that made me unhappy and stressed which doesn't help anyone.
take care & good luck.

mel27 · Mar 9, 2008 2:42PM

Hiya, Abbie is 10 months now but i know exactly what you are going through, when she was a newborn i found myself dreading every feed it was so painful i would cry! i also used lansinho cream it was amazing really helped alot, i bled aswell it is awful but it does get easier!! i had thrush when abbie was a few days old and that was really painful (maybe check with mw its not that).

I cant tell you what to do, but if you do go onto formula you have nothing at all to feel bad about! If you really want to keep bf it does get easier really it does! Abbie is 10 months now and we are still going,

If you would like any help or anything then my email address is mel_hackworth@hotmail.com im not claiming to be an expert but ive been through and come out the other side of the pain, we have experienced all problems, cracked nipples, thrush, mastitus so i might be able to help, i have msn also if you want to add me

Good luck love mel xxx

Mummy2gorgeousgirls · Mar 9, 2008 2:49PM

I had loads of probs when I first started as Brooke was so sleepy she didn't want to feed (she was prem and in special care) I found that I had to express after every attempt at feeding as otherwise I was in so much pain! So I'd recommend that if you do some feeding by bottle then express afterwards anyway so it's not so sore - also the nurses said to me that if you get engorged it's too hard for the baby to get the milk as the skin is too tight! (TMI?)
I think that whatever you decide then it'll be the best decision but I can say it definately gets easier the longer you do it and although it hurts, that does stop. I remember stamping my feet and clutching a cloth to stop me from screaming sometimes - my dh thought I was going mad!! (I know Jools Oliver, Jamie's wife went through this too so I was in good company!)
It might help to express from the bleeding boob and feed you lo from the other until it's healed a little.
Hope it goes well!

mumto225 · Mar 9, 2008 3:27PM

hi amy, yes it is extremely painful when your milk is coming in and like everyone else i was in tears during every feed too, but it doesn't last long hun they should settle down within a few days. try some cream and linzimc's idea is fab too (frozen breast pads)
personally i was glad i didn't give up, maybe get midwife/ hv to check for thrush/infection and latching on properly.

i can't quite remember how long it takes for your boobs to settle down, i'm sure it's only a few days... can anyone help on that one??

at the end of the day make sure your doing what YOU want to do, that's the most important thing xx.

MLM_and_baby_bump_Digby · Mar 9, 2008 3:42PM

Hi
I really feel for you at the moment its so so tough when you are in this amount of pain.I too had very sore nipples about 8 months ago when my lo was newborn.It was tough but the good news is we got through it and I am still breast feeding her now.

You def should get the Lanisoh cream its about ??10.00 a tube but so worth the money.Use loads of it on your nipples don't be mean with it !!
I would also soak in the bath and put warm flannels on my breasts.I couldn't shower as the water felt like needles on my nipples.

Double check your position when b/f my m/w told me count to 10 after baby latched on if its still really sore then break babys latch with your little finger and start again.

I also b/f loads lying down in bed I don't know why but it was less painful
When my milk came in I cried all day its normal to feel like this!!
Make sure you get as much rest when you can and limit visitors your rest is more important.
If after all you decide to bottle feed formula then don't feel guilty.I tried to breast feed my 1st baby and went onto formula after a week as it was just not working out.He is a very healthy strong 6 year old and he didn't care where is milk came from in the end .I think us mums do a good job of beating ourselves up over everything.You have and are trying your best by your baby - that is all you can do.
Good luck with it all and congrats on your lovely new baby.

Anna280507 · Mar 9, 2008 3:52PM

Hi there

I was really nervous when i started breastfeeding as i'm sure everyone is, it was soo painful i used to squeeze my partners hand or a pillow everytime a feed was due cause i felt so tense, my mum told me to hang on in there for 2 weeks as it will get easier i couldnt see that happening but i bought some lasinoh nipple cream and before each feed used to put a bit on each nipple (it doesnt harm baby), after a few days using this it felt more comfortable and after 2-3 weeks i was okay, i carried on using the cream for 4 months and then didnt need to. It really helped me and i didnt suffer with bleeding or chapped nipples which i know can make things so much harder. Also, and i know its diff but try try try to be calm and relaxed, dont rush and get yourself worked up if baby is not latching on properly just keep taking you lo off and on until the latch is comfortable as if it isnt it will be painful, just take your time honestly that way in time you will be so natural at it and once you lo does discover the proper way to latch she will just do it naturally then both of you can sit and enjoy the lovely closeness of eachother!!

Good luck, i promise you are not alone and that it does get easier xxxxxxxxxxxx

FitandFab46340 · Mar 9, 2008 4:01PM

Hey Hun

I totally understand what u are going throu, i have been there myself with my son Arthur when he was little, i bf him for 5 weeks and i couldnt handle it anymore due to fact hes always on my breast every half hour!!!

What i did at first when i was in pain and bleeding like urself is i express some milk and rub it around my nipples and arora area as well and then i put my nipple on top of my sons lips so he can clash on with whole mouth and its did work

Give it a try and see what happened hunni

Good luck and its will get easier trust me!

Cheriste xxxxxxx

-kia- · Mar 9, 2008 4:31PM

Oh dear I can sympathise.. I had 3 weeks of pain when bf-ing my son.

Lansinoh is definately worth the money... use it lots and it will help.

I started introducing formula feeds at around 2 weeks cause I was so sore and my son was constantly hungry and now at 11 weeks old he's doing absolutely fine on a combination of breast feeding and formula feeding. The one big thing I did that really helped with the soreness was after I started introducing formula feeds, I spent one day solely expressing for feeds and he had formula and expressed milk only so it gave my nipples a much needed rest and things got easier from there. I found that introducing formula took some of hte pressure off and after an initial guilt trip I felt so much better and my son is happy and gaining weight so I don't feel bad at all.

I was originally told that if the latch is right then it shouldn't hurt but so many midwives in hospital told me that was rubbish.. I think it does get easier as your nipples toughen up ..

Hope you figure out what works for you..

mskene · Mar 9, 2008 4:50PM

HIya ask your midwife about gelpad stuff its prescribed - you keep it in the fridge till your ready to put it on your nipple, i used it and it was ace, really cool and soothing!

it does get better, yeah your boobs will feel like melons but they do soften, and persivere coz it is worth it! RELAX

highlandfea · Mar 9, 2008 5:06PM

hi babe sorry to hear you are so sore but as you will have noticed its almost normal!!you are both learning and will get there honestly .its like any part of your body if it gets to much rubbing etc it will be sore till it gets used to it just like getting a new pair of shoes your heals hurt then one day they become the comfy ones you always wear !!strange analogy i kow but it some how strangely makes sense lol there is a bf forum on here which is brill and lots of cool ladies who give great advice. my only tit bit (excuse the pun lol ) take it 24 hour at a time ...i was where you are with abby saying to my self 1 more day and thats it well guess what 24 weeks later no breast pain and a big happy babie it was a couple of weeks before we stopped hurting and then i got thrush so the 24 hr thing started again.now i love the feed early in the morn about 5 am when its just the 2 ofus sitting on the rocker bf cant beat it to special for words and oh so easy cos you dont have to makeup bottles
fea x

tricky-13537 · Mar 9, 2008 5:34PM

i only breastfed 4 3days til i cudnt take it anymore and stoppin was the best decision ever lol id started 2 dread her wakin up now shes 6 months old and doin great on formula

LimeCupcake · Mar 9, 2008 6:14PM

Have you tried those breast sheilds that are like nipples? Never tried them so dunno if they work but they are supposed to be so you can keep bfing even when your nipples get sore.

Carol-AnnGurney · Mar 9, 2008 6:26PM

Wow, that's brought back a lot of memories. Maxwell is 9 mths old now, I was determined to breastfeed and completely sympathise with everything you are going through right now. The day your milk comes through is so painful, try and express, a great tip given to me, was to use lettuce leafs from the fridge to help when engorged, the relief is bliss! And ditto for the cream - it works wonders. I had such a difficult time b/f I ended up mixed feeding.

There's so much pressure on us to b/f now, but you have to do what's right for you n baby, what makes you both comfortable and happy. My sis in law's baby is 6 weeks old and she only b/f for 3 days, she didn't want to throughout her pregnancy but felt that she had to. Don't worry about anyone else, do what you want to do, take care x

dinky_Cath · Mar 10, 2008 8:39AM

I lasted about 2 weeks and it was really upsetting me that everytime my baby cried for food I was dreading the thought of feeding him. Put him on formula and the effect was almost instant - he calmed down straight away and FINALLY seemed satisifed - I have never looked back. Will I try to bf again with my next? Probably ,but its not the end of the world if its not for you. Good luck with whatever you choose!

MumMum3000 · Mar 10, 2008 8:42AM

Thank you so much for all your replies!
All your advice has been so hepful.

Well its now the next day and i'm still going.
I can't bear even the thought of breastfeeding her at the mo so have been expressing which hasn't hurt me at all. I have given her my milk from a bottle for the last 4 feeds and have another bottle waiting. My nipples are already so much better.

I have now bought some Lansinoh and I think it might already be doing the trick. I didn't know you could put it on BEFORE a feed though so i'll try that when I get the courage to feed her again.

I also bought some gel pads, so thank you for that tip too. I bought some for my stitches whilst I was there so hoping they help too!

I'm sending hubby off to buy some breast sheld thingys in a min.

I'm really trying to make this work so i'm hoping it will!

Thank you again for all your advice.
Its nice just knowing that its not just me!

Amy xxxxxxxx

EnglebertW_nkface · Mar 10, 2008 10:01AM

Sorry to hear that you are having problems, breastfeeding can be agony untill you get the hang of it! Just one thought along with what everyone else has suggested but has your midwife checked Ruby for tounge tie? It is quite common and easily rectified but can make breastfeeding extremely difficult and painful so it might be worth getting her to check.
Good Luck, hope it starts to feel easier soon
Kerry xx

niknakpaddywhack · Mar 10, 2008 2:15PM

Hi Amy,
Hope things are going better for you. My lo is now 2 weeks old and I'm still going with the breast feeding, although had really sore nipples to begin with. I did what you have been, and expressed from the worst side and just fed her from the better side, for a few days.

Lansinoh cream is amazing, and I experimented with all the different positions to get her to latch on better, but the best tip my mw gave me was to expose my nipple to air as much as possible. So there I sat for hours with hubby on the sofa watching TV with my boobs hanging out! It worked though, the scabs soon healed up and now it doesn't hurt at all to feed and I'm really enjoying it.

Good luck and hope you can keep it going.
Niki and Evie xx

Nertila Uruci · Feb 14, 2013 9:36PM

hi everyone I wonted to ask i just gave birth one week before and today I have to much pain and burn in my brest,I dont know what to do because evry time that I brestfeed my little girl the pain is more and my nipples are little bit sour.If someone can help me pleas let me know thanks a lot

Parent007 · Feb 15, 2013 2:31PM

I suggest you get a breast pump to pump out the milk.

Breastfeeding - I can't take the pain anymore

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