Self-indulgent whinge, sorry

Grr, I'm bloody annoyed at my DH this weekend. I really wanted to go to a (formal) university reunion but as I'm bf and Lily won't take a bottle it would have involved him coming along too and keeping her occupied for a few hours whilst I had dinner. I suggested making a weekend of it - staying in a B&B etc - and made it clear I wouldn't be out partying all night or anything - I just wanted to have dinner with everyone. Suggestion was met with a shrug and a sulky look so I didn't mention it again, hoping he'd go away and realise that he was being an arse. Sadly this was not to be. You wouldn't think a few hours alone in the town we both went to university in so that I could have a bit of me time would kill him, would you? I haven't had a single night out since Lily was born 11 weeks ago, because I haven't wanted to - the one time I do and he won't put himself out for me.

He's going away with the lads for a long weekend in May - guess who's driving him to the airport, looking after the baby for the weekend & picking him up? The thing that REALLY annoys me about this isn't the unfairness of him getting to do his thing and me not getting do to mine - it's that my first thought was "he'll enjoy that and he deserves to go" - HIS first thought was "what a hassle for me" :x

Don't get me wrong, my DH is a good boy and a brilliant Daddy, but he definitely does have his head up his own arse sometimes :evil:


  • gatecrashing from preg, don't get me started on insensitive husbands. Mine went out for a curry last friday (13th) with old work mates of his and I was left with 2 kids and 26 week bump. I've been off work for 2 weeks with non preg related illness and was feeling a bit sorry for myself so guess what I found when I got up on Sat (valentines day) . . . . . . . . . . . no valentines card or anything!!!!!!! OK so we've been together 10 years but we've always given each other something small and a silly card. When I grudgingly gave him his he said he didn't think we were doing anything this year??? Why not???


    h x
  • Oh no, I really do know what you mean and it sucks doesnt it!!

    My oh thinks nothing of going away for a weekend without me or Gabe and doesn't even ask my plans....

    I have to say, having Gabe has taught me that a woman doesn't have to be single to be 'left holding the baby'... Gah.

  • I'm not surprised you're upset! Have you told him everything that you've told us in your post? That might make him realise that perhaps he's been a little bit selfish! Sometimes men just need it spelt out to them...

  • men!! they r so selfish sometimes arnt they, well if i were u i would show him this post then he can c how u really feel and what we all think about it, then if that fails i would personally not put myself out and take him to the airport- make him find his own way there!! lol xxx
  • my oh is a fab daddy and so lovely but i could actually kill him
    i have always had a lie in on a sunday as he always goes to his mates on a fri so has a lie in then, guess who was up this mornin? that was after id listened to fin for 1/2 hour!! oh then goes ah babe it was your lie in, your mad arent you? get your arse out of your pit then and feed your son. aarrgghh. and i took fin out all afternoon to see my relatives as he needed to chill!!!great, i cant remember thelast time i chilled. and i have to spend all day with his family. im actually in quite a babd mood - ooohh, i can make his life a over,
  • my god... Men are all the same! My oh is on a stag weekend which happened to start on wednesday??? He rang last night saying he won't be back til monday night, so just chatting, i said about me and a friend going to a spa for the day so could he take harry. Along came the reply of 'what for?' lmao. Idiots. Xxx
  • Me too. Since moving here I have been out once past 4.30 in the afternoon and that was my works xmas party back home. He goes out when most time when his family and friends come up. I never get an invite to go out with him and even if he did I would still have to be the one to keep an eye on Freya and come home ealry for Freya bed time, food time etc. Baby sitters are a bit of an issue but all his family have said they would do it but if I wanted to go out I would have to arrange everything, He was away all valentines weekend bcoz of work, then went out for the night the tuesday and couldn't understand why I was peeved about it?? He got to spend a night in a five star hotel and go for a 5 star curry all for nothing!! he did buy us lunch the next day and we had a loverly day out for which I really appriciated and enjoyed, but I didn't get a break. I still had to think about dinner, Freya etc, My next break from it all is in May when my Mum is having Freya for the weekend so we can go to a wedding....but I will have a 4 week old baby. And then when he doesn't go out he spends all his free time in the house sat at this computer. I have to ask him for a deal with do a job more then once.

    Its nice to know I'm not the only one. Maybe we should get all our oh's together and do the same to them. LoL.

    X X X
  • Arrrggghhhh - dont get me started on hubby can be a total prat sometimes, complete with disappearing all day,turning phone off then turning up drunk at 4pm and throwing up in front of kids. Valentines Day was particularly lovely this yr, he didnt get my anything cos he snuck out to the pub then told me didnt even when i found texts on his phone proving he was in pub all afternoon, grrrrrrr. tosser.
    nuff said.
    looks like a lot of us have trouble with our oh's hon xxx
  • Thanks for your advice and sympathy, ladies :\)

    I was so irritated last night that after I gave Lily her dream feed at 11.30pm I woke him up (the poor lamb is very tired lately because his sleep is broken due to night feeds - the night feeds that I get up to do, that is :roll: ) and discussed it with him. He was very reasonable and apologetic so I've forgiven him.

    He's also shown me some support by making me express a few times today so that he can keep trying to get Lily to take a bottle (before this he only tried when I sat him down and put it into his hand). And guess what - this afternoon she took one! It was only 2oz as that was all I had expressed, but she definitely got the hang of it (after poor DH had to put up with her yelling at him for 15 mins).

    Part of me feels liberated - now I know I can go out!! - but I also feel a little bit sad as she doesn't "need" me anymore :cry:

    [Modified by: PinkToothbrush on February 22, 2009 06:57 PM]

  • Anyone want to buy my other half???? SIck of tripping over him at the mo. LOL. I am going through a period feeling like a single mom whos in a permanent relationship. He thinks he can sit and not do anything with the LO. What an ass he can be at times, problem is I would miss him if he wasnt there LOL.

    I was feeling kind last night though. I had arrangements to go see a folk band with a friend i hadnt seen for 14 years, and as OH had to be up the following day at 5am for work, I arranged for me and LO to stay at my moms for the night. Main reasons were a) venue was closer to my moms than home, b) i was planning on having a drink or 6. I could have a lie in (first all week) and my mom woould look after LO til i got up. Bless, he was so upset to say goodnight and goodbye to LO so iv been told.

    Think all men have their days LOL
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