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Weaning advice for 9 month old
Hi ladies,
Not posted on here before but really need some suggestions. My lo is 9 months old and loves breastfeeding, I'm going back to work 3 days in March and Im really struggling to get him to take milk from bottle or sippy cup, I've tired various. Also he still needs boob to fall asleep and sleeps in my bed, tried to get him in cot on several occasions with no success. I'm starting to really want my bed back and also would be nice if dad could settle him on occasions but lo just gets himself so upset. I'm also really worried about naps at childminders when I'm in work, she has another baby and toddler to look after and I'm worried he will be left to cry it out.
I don't want to stop feeding completely just need to decrease daytime supply because expressing in work is impossible.
Any ideas or suggestions would be gratefully received.
Thanks x
Not posted on here before but really need some suggestions. My lo is 9 months old and loves breastfeeding, I'm going back to work 3 days in March and Im really struggling to get him to take milk from bottle or sippy cup, I've tired various. Also he still needs boob to fall asleep and sleeps in my bed, tried to get him in cot on several occasions with no success. I'm starting to really want my bed back and also would be nice if dad could settle him on occasions but lo just gets himself so upset. I'm also really worried about naps at childminders when I'm in work, she has another baby and toddler to look after and I'm worried he will be left to cry it out.
I don't want to stop feeding completely just need to decrease daytime supply because expressing in work is impossible.
Any ideas or suggestions would be gratefully received.
Thanks x
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Replies
i know how you feel - my LO is 5 months and am going back when he's 8 months but i was so stressed as he wouldnt take a bottle and he doesnt sleep without falling asleep at the breast.
I went to a back to work seminar by a cracking health visitor who is very pro breast feeding. I thought i had tried every bottle and teat going, had also tried someone else feeding him, been doing it since he was 8 weeks old and was sick of worrying about it. They kept telling me in time he'd take a cup but i was worried this wasnt soothing and sometimes i would have to miss bedtime - couldnt see him settleing after a cup of milk.
She advised several things - to let someone else feed him when you are totally out of sight and earshot. To get them to feed your LO in his/her car seat - facing him and making it a social thing. It needs to be a separate experience to breast feeding - different person, different position etc so he doesnt associate it. She also suggested NUK teats as she has seen lots of success stories with these, and to run the teat under scalding water beforehand to make it seem more like body temp.
After 3 months of trying my LO took a bottle that afternoon! In his car seat, facing my mum, cooing and smiling at her. I was no where to be heard or seen! Ever since he's had one every day and we've had no trouble. Its just so important you dont give it and they dont see or hear you or have cuddles whilst having it. Im hoping by the time i go back, when i miss bedtime, he will be able to have it cuddled up to his dad but by then im hoping hes well used to it. We never got to buy the NUK teat but had success with MAM teat. About 6 weeks ago i taught him to suck on a dummy to try and teach him to suck on a teat and i thought the MAM was most like his dummy. He had previously swallowed fast and choked on the milk, then got scared and rejected the bottle, so he has it with a size one newborn teat rather than one for his age. It takes a bit longer to feed him but who cares - he takes it! We never warmed the teat as he cracked it without us having to do this.
as far as settleing at the breast goes, my hv told me children are so much more adaptable than we imagine and given a different set of circumstances, different environment and different person caring for them they learn things are different. I asked her if i should stop breast feeding him to sleep now and she said this time is precious and not to give it to my emplyer and deprive both of us of lovely cuddles! In time he'll take a bottle and have a cuddle from someone else. Tbh if he doesnt i will be home for 9pm and will just have to breast feed him then till he learns. I guess at least you dont have to miss bedtime but i understand you wanting your bed back. might be a lot for your lo to take on board all at once though, let him get to grips with bottles and you working etc and build up to that one.
my lo is doing a couple of half days in nursery and they tell me that children often lie down and sleep there spontaneously where they never do at home. I think the environment is much more busy and tiring and i guess it will be the same at the childminders.
i feel your pain though - leaving them breaks your heart but if i know he can eat and sleep without me ill feel much happier!
incidentally my hv said from 8 months children can get by on a bf morning and night and food and water the rest of the time - so you shoudlnt need to give formula. she said just to keep up with dairy in their diet. Id like to try and maintain an expressed feed in the days at work though coz when im off id still like the milk to be there to give him more breast feeds and cuddles. Ive known freinds of mine manage to feed mornign and night on work days and more than that on days off with no problems but my HV did say its a mastitus risk. How much does your LO breast feed now? Im interested as not started solids with mine yet and im finding the not knowing how much milk he'll need when on 3 meals hard xx
Thanks for the reply, I'm definitely going to get my husband to try feeding again using the car seat and warming the teat. I know it's really stressful thinking about going back to work but I think once we get into the routine of it will be fine, I think the thought of going back is worse than being back in work.
My lo feeds about 4 times or so during the day now he has 3 meals a day, a lot of this is comfort rather than hunger though so I'm sure he will manage with morning and evening feeds. Just hoping I can get away without expressing in work, it's quite a young office and not many of them have children, a lot of them think it's weird I'm still feeding had the odd comment when ive gone in, so could really do without having to express there.
Good luck, hope your return to work is hassle free as possible x
forgot its also important they latch on to the base of the teat rather than just the end of it - so its more like latching onto the breast. I think sometimes my mum was scared of his angry reaction and went so tentatively she only put the end of the teat in - when it worked she was allowing him to suck properly on the base of the teat.
its soul destroying keep throwing the milk down the sink isnt it - but persvere, he will do it. Does he have a cup? As at 9 months he should be teachable with this too if all else fails. Although i worried it would be messy and would waste my precious milk!!
re expressing at work, ive decided to go for it and spend 190 pounds on a hospital grade pump. I know it sounds excessive but they are the only ones desinged for frequent use - women manage to feed their babies with them exclusively for months and even years when babies dont manage to learn how to breast feed. All other pumps are for occasional use (handhelds and most electric non hospital grade) and its just tough to keep up daily pumping. Plus with hospital grade you can pump both sides and get plenty, getting it done in 15 mins or so. Medella do a great double sided symphony pump that comes in a mini back pack with a cooler box for the milk. So it would look subtle and you could quickly put your milk in your cooler box and not feel embarassed about storing it in a staff fridge. while everyone else is having a cup of tea dont see why i shouldnt have a quick expressing break. If things are busy ill just chuck all the bits in the bag and clean them when i get home. Your employer is obliged to provide a private clean place for you to express and in an 8 hour day or so you may only need to do it once. Have found this pump for 190 on amazon - have yet to find it cheaper although it can be as much as 299 so shop around. I know its a lot of money but whats more important than what goes into your baby? We never spent much on pram, fancy things for bubba and accepted second hand stuff from friends. I strongly believe if you're going to spend money though, this is worth it, and we plan to have another baby at some point so its got to be worth having.
I looked at renting but they're 45 pounds just for 10 days and 50 quid for every month after so not really worth it. Also looked at 2nd hand but HV warned some can get mouldy in side if the milk has back tracked and that made me feel ill!!
all that said though i think if you work normal hours you prbably could get away without doing it at work - my shift work will be more challenging and i know the stress and tiredness of returning to work can make your supply dip so i want to do everything i can to stop that happening. its important you tell your employer you intend to continue breast feeding and plan to express at work if you do - in your back to work letter so she has it in writing as she then has a legal obligation. No reason why your colleagues should have to have anything to do with it.
Good luck witht he bottle let us know how it goes xx
My baby sleeps with me too and so did my other. Managed to get her in to a bed though at 13 months.
As far as work is concerned they are legally obliged to give you breaks. I know its hard though. I work with many younger girls and with those who bottle feed and have had comments like "You're STILL feeding?" like its something weird. I find it annoying. I used to let it go with my first but not now. I say things like "Breast feeding is recommended for at least 2 years by the World Health Organisation" (I work in the NHS so it shuts them up) or "Did you know women have the right to feed for as long as they want and its sex discrimination to not let them" I know it may be hard but dont let your colleagues put you off doing something you love. Its so precious, you wont get this time back. One of my colleagues who has bottle fed her baby asked me how long I thought I would be breast feeding for as she clearly didnt approve of me feeding a 9 month old. I just answered with "How long you going to give your baby formula for?" Soon shut her up!
Hope it does go well when you go back to work and well done for keeping it up x