Going back to work with two children...:-(

roo85 · May 23, 2016 12:20PM

Hi,

I still have a few months left of maternity leave (thank goodness) but have just found out my request for going back 2 days has been declined. I will be returning 3 days a week. I am really disappointed but nothing I can do about it, so I was hoping someone out there has two children and works, is it ok? or is it just terrible?

I am dreading leaving them both for that long, I am dreading coping with the work load (I am a teacher and even though we get long hols the work load is horrendous and I have no idea how I am going to handle it) and I just feel SO BLOOMIN GUILTY! No one I know with two kids has had to go back to work and some have commented how they would never want to work with two kids. I don't have a choice as we just cannot afford to live off one income. I feel so sad and upset.

Please someone out there reassure me it will be ok??? how have you managed it? any teachers out there working and how do you cope with the work load????

thanks x

Gift · Dec 29, 2011 8:29AM

Hello dear, I read your post and didn't just want to read and run. I was pregnant at the same time as a colleges wife and she actually had two children and was a teacher and was pregnant with the third. Now her second was only a year old or less than a year when she feel pregnant with the third, so she went back to work for about six months or so, not very sure exact dates/months but all i know she wasn't back at work very long and then she gave birth to her third child. So it is very possible, I'm still on mat leave and was really dreading leaving my little girl, but now i can see that she is just a little madam and she loves my mother (who will be taking care of her) so i'm not worried at all anymore.

All the best dear and I know everything is going to be just fine.

Snugglenush · Dec 29, 2011 1:54PM

Hi

I am also a teacher but with just 1 child and I know it's tough and I don't have any advice. Other than, I thought it was going to be impossible with 1 child, but I managed. Plenty of people do it - and you will get into a routine and manage becuase you have to.

good luck though!

blondefriend · Dec 29, 2011 4:35PM

I work full time, am a HoD of a dept with 9 A-Level sets, have a 3 year old (just!) and a 15 month old. Oh and my 15 month old has complex medical needs, developmental delay, food allergies and feeding disorders (needs tube-feeding). He has been in hospital 3 times since September and I have been known to stay overnight in hospital with him, go to work and teach a full day, pick up my daughter after nursery, take her home and bath her, go back to the hospital to take over from my husband, mark papers by his bedside, comfort him overnight and return to work the next day.

So yes you'll manage. I am finding it absolutely s**t but I think I might have taken on too much. Unfortunately I don't have a choice if I want to save the family home. I work or we move.

There will be hard times but as they get older it will get easier.

H xx

roo85 · Dec 31, 2011 10:12AM

thank you for your honest replies. I know I am lucky enough to have a job, and I am lucky we have anice home. So yes, I need to deal with it and it will be ok. I know I will have to manage... it will be hard leaving them but it probably wil be worse for me I guess... I am just so annoyed that they won't let me do two days. Seeing they have to advertise for a job share with me anyway, I don't see why they can't advertise a 3 day job and let me do 2 days... it seems so mean....

oh well.

thanks again for your replies x

BabyDex · Jan 2, 2012 4:23PM

Hi, I just read your post and wanted to add that I have 2 babies, 22 months and 10 months.

I work 33 hours a week over 4 days and it is fine. I was really dreading going back to work as I had been on maternity leave for near on 2 years but it was much easier than I thought and dare I say it I even enjoy it! I do miss my children and did feel guilty to start with but like you I have to go to work as we cannot afford to live on one income. I hope everything goes ok for you when you back to work, Im sure it will x

iwantanotherpls · Jan 8, 2012 11:43AM

i work full time- contracted for 37.5 but work over time if its available.

my children are now 6 and half and 2. i have always worked full time only taking 8 months mat leave both times. yes it is hard work but being super orangised helps loads!

I have had the oppertunity to give up work but i wouldnt like to see my husband breaking his back to support me and to be completely hionest i like living in the manner ive become a customed to (nice car,nice house,holidays days out every time we have a day off,nice clothes etc) and also i think i am setting my children a good example that they too will have to work for what they have xx

TriTread · Jan 24, 2012 8:33AM

When I go back from mat leave I'll have a 3 year old and 1 year old (just about). I currently do 33.5 hours over 4 days and am hoping to go back on 25 hours over 3 days. Realistically I will probably have to take a grade reduction and further pay cut but I'm willing to do that to keep my job (which I love) and maintain the lifestyle I want for my family. My toddler has really flourished at nursery - she currently goes twice a week and I think the balance is about right. I know it will be tough to go back to work but I really think it's better for everyone.

That said, I know what it's like not to get the flexi hours you want. I never wanted to go back on 4 days a week last time but I couldn't do my job in less time...and I knew that before I got preggers. Ho hum.

Jpink000 · May 23, 2016 12:20PM

I know this is an old thread but really relevant to me. Has the original poster got on okay at work with two? I'd love to know.

I have a 5 yr old and a 7m old baby and returning as a lead teacher this June. I am.returning FT again. I was an NQT when I returned after just 8 months with my first baby. I coped fine. I think you just have to get super organised with calenders, packing bags the night before and phone reminders etc. I also really recommend working late just one night a week. I do Fridays so I can have the weekends with my children. Friday night I'll typically work 8-12 and also Monday and Tuesday for an hour or two. This equates to 6-8 hours of work outside of school.

I mark books early morning and through lunch and (best tip ever...) in the lesson itself by walking around the room. The kids love it and it saves a few hours a week! Also before meting as you're waiting for late comers. Why waste your precious time!!

It doesn't always pay to go PT as my colleagues just work their days off. It's a very personal choice.

Lots of hugs and support to fellow teachers x

Going back to work with two children...:-(

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