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Bottle Feeding Stigma?
I'm expecting my second baby in April, and with so much focus on "breast is best" I'm worried about being stigmatised for choosing to bottle feed.
Problem is, I breastfed my daughter for 3 and a half weeks and was told to switch to formula as she was losing weight. I found it incredibly uncomfortable and can't stand my nipples being touched at all anymore! I just feel safer bottlefeeding, and will appreciate the OH on night duty as I have my nearly 4 year old to deal with all day, I'm self-employed and OH works full-time.
Has anyone else felt ganged up on for choosing not to breastfeed?
~Saz x
Problem is, I breastfed my daughter for 3 and a half weeks and was told to switch to formula as she was losing weight. I found it incredibly uncomfortable and can't stand my nipples being touched at all anymore! I just feel safer bottlefeeding, and will appreciate the OH on night duty as I have my nearly 4 year old to deal with all day, I'm self-employed and OH works full-time.
Has anyone else felt ganged up on for choosing not to breastfeed?
~Saz x
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Replies
How awful is that, being told to bottle feed outside!
People are already asking if I'm going to breastfeed and I can't help feeling judged for saying no.
~Saz x
I tried breastfeeding but unfortunately, because of the very strong drugs that I had whilst I was pregnant, we came to the conclusion that I was not going to produce any milk. We're actually not sure whether it was the drugs or the fact that my body was buggered from 9 months of hell! However, I got lots of grief for not trying whilst I was still in hospital (had csection so had to stay for a while) and then felt that people thought I should have persevered harder.
TBH, 9 months on, I know I did the right thing for me and my little one - I also know that it would have been good if I could have done it, but I couldn't, so tough!
One thing I would say is that the girls who came into my ward and said they were bottlefeeding straight away didn't get any hassle from anyone and were given milk left, right and centre... Hope you get that sort of experience...
C xx
dont worry about sounding rude if you need to tell them to pee off.
Start out by saying that you've already chosen how your baby is going to bed fed thank you very much, and if they still push then just say pee off!
The ward I was on if mums were ff they were given bottles of milk and their babies were taken to the nursery for the night so mums could rest - I had a cs and had to ask for help to feed lo and each time (except for one mw who i knew from my peer supporters course) they literally shoved my breast inside and walked away. although lo wouldnt feed for the first 24 hours - I had no choice but to let them do it that way until I could move around better by myself and work out what way worked for me and MJ.
xx
My LO is my first and I chose not to breastfeed, for the simple reason that I cannot bring myself to do it. I have absolutely nothing whatsoever against other mothers breastfeeding and agree 100% with all the health benifits, but it is something I have just never felt was natural for me. So much so that when LO was born I tried to express and could barely bring myself to try. I remember sitting on the sofa trying to express and crying thinking I was the most awful woman in the world for not wanting to do the best for my LO. THEN.... the most wonderful midwife in the whole world arrives and gave me some advice and I never looked back! A happy mother = a happy baby! Simple as!
It is your baby and you do what feels right for you! Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. And I do also think that we make it look and feel a lot worse in our own minds, as new mums we tend to judge ourselves a lot harder than most people do! If I look back now, most of the questioning and the judgement came from other mothers, not the health professionals I saw.
When I have my next, I will FF again from birth and I will not feel the need to justify myself to anyone. My LO is now a very happy, very healthy 7 month old and I am a very happy mother!
Best of luck with your new arrival xx
~Saz x
Good Luck!
xxx
I feel much better and more confident to stick by my guns now =]
~Saz x
I ended up changing to bottle and felt like a leper for it. I was ashamed and felt like a failure BUT it was the best decision for us as we were able to bond as I was no longer afraid of his cries or to feed him and I felt better in myself.
I actually do believe that breast milk is best but I do not belive that formula is bad and will be bottle feeding this bub when he arrives in August. I am deciding if I will try to breast feed or get him to try immediatley after birth but honestly the though fills me with dread so will probably bottle feed with the Tommee Tippee closer to nature bottles and feel confident that I am making a choice that will ensure that both my baby & I are happy....and fed!