Just been diagnosed

I am new to this forum. My dd is 10.5 months and I love her to bits-she means everything to me and so much more. I returned to work 4 weeks ago after having just under a year off on maternity leave. Since my return I have been finding things really hard. I have been stressing over silly things and I have felt immensly guilty at leaving dd at home without me. I work full time at the moment and have been trying so hard to fight things but today I finaly gave in and went to the dr. I have just started on fluoxetine today so hoping to not have too many side effects!!
Just looking for someone to talk to and some support. I feel very tearful. I feel guilty for not coping as dd is such a laid back baby and I feel guilty for getting PND (I've had depression in the past). I feel like I have let hubby down!!
Oh and to top things off I need to have an operation down there as the stupid midwives did not stitch me up at the time!!


  • Oh hun,

    This is very like my story, I was diagnosed when dd was 9 months she is now 10.5 months and the hardest bit was admitting that I needed help, when I did finally admit it I felt drained and just wanted to sleep for about 3 days.
    I have had a lot of health issues since dd was born, I had an abnormal smear and had to have a biopsy, also have to wait for an operation 'down there' as well! I had an episotomy that needs a bit of repair. Plus dd had reflux that only really got sorted about 2 months ago and I just couldnt admit that I wasnt coping, I have been on citalopram just over a month now and I can honestly say that I have felt so much better, I will be on them for 6 months but it really has made a difference so far, I do still get low points but I can feel the difference in me.
    You ever need to chat away from BE you can email me.

    You are not alone and you have taken the first and hardest step for recovery xxx
  • thanks for the reply hun!!
    Medication is making me dizzy and confussed at the moment so hoping it kicks in soon!!
    Do you mind me asking about your operation? Have they told you how long the recovery will be? Really worried about it tbh!!
  • Try not to worry, they have told me its a minor operation and that I will be a bit sore for a while but I can basically start getting back to normal the following day. I hope the meds kick in soon but if you find that they are still giving you dizzy spells, go back you may need a different tablet xxx
  • I'm new to this particular part of the forum & have just posted my story.

    Your story sounds very similar to mine (apart from your problem down below).

    I think coming back to work may have been the catalyst in feeling like this for me alghough things that happended last year have contributed.

    I just don't feel like I can keep this pace up & this time next year I will have another - i'm bloody terrified.

    Working full time with 2 kids,having energy or the desire for hubby, keeping up with your friends. How does anyone do it?

    I was on Fluoxetine about 3 years ago so I really hope you start to feel better, I can't remember too much about being on it but after 4 months I just went cold turkey which the doc said I musn't do but I felt like I didn't want to be medicated indefinately.

    I do know someone who has been on it 13+ yrs tho - now that is a bad ome down waiting to happen!
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