Forum home Pregnancy Miscarriage & pregnancy loss

Joining you after 3rd mc

Hi everyone, I'm new to here.

miscarried last July at 14 weeks, Jan at 5 weeks and in the middle of the third mc at 8 weeks. We even saw the heartbeat a week ago, but baby stopped growing straight after. Totally devastated and terrified that it will never happen for us. I had shingles during this pregnancy so I'm naively hoping that's the cause rather than something more permanent.

Could do with some support or positive stories if there are any out there.  Thanks x 


  • Hi Roots1985, welcome. I am so, so, sorry to hear about your losses, I know how devastating and helpless it feels. I myself had 2 MCs before having my 1st DD, then another MC before My 2nd DD & DS.Pleased be reassured that you can go on to have a health pregnancy after 3 recurrent MCs (my friend had 4 MCs before having her little boy after TTC for 3 years) and that your Dr should hopefully now refer you to try and get to the bottom of any causes. I hope you are resting, being looked after and have people you can talk too. Please take care, have courage and I wish you all the very best. if ever you need to know where to come. Xx

  • Thanks so much Babyarama. I needed to hear some positive stories! I keep reading all of these awful statistics about never being able to keep a baby in there safely. I feel like I've left myself and my husband down again. I've got some amazing support. I don't know how women get through this on their own. The only thing that gets me through is knowing what an amazing family and friendship group I have. I just wish the mc would progress so I can move on xx 

  • Oh Roots1985, we're so sorry to hear about your losses - especially as they've all come so close together. How truly heartbreaking.

    It's fantastic to hear you've got some amazingly supportive family and friends (hurrah!) and we also hope you can find loads of support here on MadeForMums Chat.

    There's a really wonderful group of women posting on our Trying to get pregnant after a miscarriage thread (it's not all about trying to get pregnant, I promise!) who, I'm sure, would love to chat to you. Do please feel free to follow the link and venture over there to say hello. I'll also post over there and let them know about your thread here.

    Wishing you much strength for the next few weeks.

  • Oh Roots, I'm so sorry to hear that.

    I have just come out the other side of my first miscarriage, which was pretty hellish. I can only imagine what you have been through xxxx

    So many hugs coming your way. There are some lively positive stories out there, they have spurred me on so I hope they help you along too. Keep the faith, keep smiling and stay positive

    It will happen


  • So sorry to hear of your losses roots... It really is such a terrible thing to go through. 

    I promise you that it does get easier.... You will never forget (or want to forget) your lost babies but you can get to a point where you can think about them being at peace & that sadly they just weren't meant for this earth.

    i have had 2 miscarriages myself. they were my 1st 2 pregnancies. Like you I was dealing with the sadness of the loss as well as the huge fear that it would never happen for us. Happily though I am now 17 weeks pregnant & feeling my little bubba wriggling around in there. Wanted to share so you know that this doesnt have to mean the end for you & your baby dreams... Online statistics scared me half to death but they really don't paint a true picture. There are lots of ladies on here who have had multiple miscarriages then gone on to have a healthy pregnancy.

    take care & we're here if you need support x

  • Thanks so much everyone. It's so nice to find a group that offers hope rather than just doom and gloom. I'm feeling terribly sad at the moment, but still hopeful for the future. I'm going to focus on being healthy and happy for now...getting fit, eating well, enjoying my husband rather than just obsessing about having a baby, booking some holidays. I'll do anything not to get into the downward spiral I ended up in last time. Having said that, it's 4pm and I'm still in bed! 

    Thank you all again xx 

  • Hi Roots,

    I wanted to let you know we are all here for you. We are all from the ttc after MC forum. There is an amazing group of women over there if you click the link Helen posted above. Please join us when you are ready. Like she said, it's not all about ttc and babies. We have all experienced the devastation of having our hopes and dreams of babies ripped from us. And know your heartache to well. I know after my MC it was very therapeutic to read all the posts And see all the success stories. 

    With that said, I wanted to give you my deepest sorry for your loss. Cry if you need to, it only gets worse when you don't let it out. I had many days I stayed in bed almost all day. You are suffering Hun, and you have the right to morn. I only had one MC and I was deeply sad, so I cannot even begin to know the heartache you feel. After my MC, in July of this past summer at 10 weeks I wasn't able to get pregnant for 8 months! It was very hard for me. I know am pregnant at 11 weeks And everything is looking good so far. The internet statistics are frightening. try to take care of yourself, keep your chin up, and certainly channel your energy in good way. Make those holiday plans!

    big hugs to you. xxxx 

  • Thank you! Something you could all help with (and sorry if this isn't the right place)...

    I'm talking to a doc on tues about next steps for starting this mc off. I hear d&c is good for just getting it over and done with. I also hear it a good for having tests done on the baby. Does anyone have any experience or advice?

    Next question..., sorry! Now that I've had 3 miscarriages I'm going to be referred for some testing. What should I be asking for? How long does it take? And what's involved?

    Don't worry if you don't know!

    Thanks xx 

  • Roots. Imo the d & c is the best option. I took medication to start things off with my first mc which ended up being extremely painful & i lost too much blood. Second time round i had a d & c which was a huge amountbless traumatic & painful.

    i had tests after my second mc. I had blood tests to check for clotting disorders, thyroid levels, hormone levels etc. i had a 3d ultrasound & a hysterosalpingogram to check for structural abnormalities in my uterus & dna blood tests to check for dna karotype issues.

    hope that helps x

  • Thank you so much, that's really helpful. I wish we didn't have to learn about all of these awful things. 

    Do we have to wait until we get the results before ttc again? X 

  • I guess that's up to you hun. I was fortunate in that that decision was out of my hands as i had all the tests done while my husband was deployed for 4 months... Figured that was the best time to get it all done as wasn't going to be able to ttc anyway!

Sign In or Register to comment.

Featured Discussions