Pregnancy loss at six weeks

Lottie82 · May 13, 2020 5:17PM

I joined a few weeks ago, when I was pregnant. But it all become overwhelming and I took myself off the site.

About three weeks ago I had a miscarriage at six weeks pregnant. It was pretty horrific and I'm just feeling a bit lonely and I'm missing a close girly friend to talk to. I don't have many friends and most of them are through my boyfriend.

I did have a best friend, but she got really nasty with me when she found out about me loosing my baby. She told me that I shouldn't have lied to her about being pregnant, that there was no excuse or reason for me to have done so. That I was trying to manipulate her. It was pretty horrendous. No longer my friend, as it's impossible to come back from something like that. Despite apologies from her. Just didn't cut it really!!

Six days after my miscarriage, my mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. So that was pretty awful too. But the doctors are hopeful. So after my Grandma died in January, it's a miracle that I'm still standing!!

Some support from people would be amazing and I hope that I can help you too. Thanks for taking time to read this.

VRob123 · May 13, 2020 7:13PM

Hi Hun! I’m so sorry for your losses, mums diagnosis and your friends reaction. I’d like to think I see the best in people and would say she’s got her own demons causing her to lash out. But what she said sounds pretty nasty. How are you coping at the moment? It sounds like you’re finding strength ❤️

Lottie82 · May 13, 2020 7:44PM

VRob123 Thank you for your response. I try to see the best in people too, but this wasn't the first time that this type of thing had happened.

Not coping too well today. How about you?

VRob123 · May 13, 2020 8:37PM

Sorry today isn’t a good day, for all you’ve dealt with you’re a very strong woman. It will get better sweet. I’m well thank you x

Lottie82 · May 13, 2020 9:22PM

VRob123 I had therapy today, so apparently it's normal to feel drained afterwards. I saw alot of people have read this post, but haven't made any comments. I'm guessing I shouldn't take it personally? I guess people don't know what it say?

VRob123 · May 13, 2020 9:42PM

Yes don’t take it personally at all, I guess many haven’t been in your situation so feel unqualified to comment. Not that I’ve been in your shoes really but have suffered pregnancy and family losses recently and MIL recently had breast cancer. But thats by the by, this is about you. I’m glad you’ve had therapy today, I’ve heard it makes you feel a bit battered after. Hopefully you’ll feel a little more refreshed in the morning ❤️ X

Lottie82 · May 13, 2020 9:51PM

VRob123 I guess it is about me, but I find showing an interest in other people helpful. I'm sorry about what you have been through. Life can be so tough and I've been so lucky up til now!!

VRob123 · May 13, 2020 9:58PM

I’m lucky I have a very grounded husband which has helped me learn to cope, plus I swear turning 30 has helped too 🤣! I can’t believe I’m the age I thought was sooo old when I was a teenager🙈

how are other aspects of your life? Hobbies, work (when you’re not in isolation) x

Lottie82 · May 13, 2020 10:13PM

My boyfriend is very grounded too, so I'm also very lucky! You sound so much more mature than 30! I think 30 is the new 16!! lol

I miss my swimming, cafes, restaurants and pubs. How about you, is there anything that you miss?

VRob123 · May 14, 2020 5:43AM

Haha, new 16, I like you 🤣! I’m quite a home bird so like to be in the house & garden. I’ve got chickens, vegetable patch and garden, dogs to walk and I’m in to crocheting, so probably much more mature than 30 🙈. I do miss going to friends for a coffee or a garden centre cafe for a slice of cheesecake. Or a good ol’ warm evening in a beer garden!

EmJ3 · May 14, 2020 6:03AM

@Lottie82 sorry you’re having such a rubbish, rubbish time. Mc is absolutely awful and with friends like that, you’re better off without her! I hope your mum’s treatment goes well. Hopefully things will start to look up.

@VRob123 are you crocheting a blanket? I got a few gifted when I had Matilda and I love them!xxx

VRob123 · May 14, 2020 6:06AM

@EmJ3 hi Hun! How you doing? Yes I’ve got a couple on the go at the moment. Doing a couple of thick ones for car seat and cot / tummy time, then will do some lighter ones as a sort of swaddle.

Lottie82 · May 14, 2020 8:26AM

Emj3 Thank you. I literally don't know how I'm functioning. I also have aspergers and unmedicated bipolar, so surprised that I haven't had a nervous break down!! Guess the therapy works.

I think life must get better, you are right. Hopefully trying for another baby, after my period comes. Might be next month. That's what's keeping me going at the moment. How's everything with you?

Lottie82 · May 14, 2020 8:33AM

VRob123 Your life sounds pretty amazing, even in lock down!! Isn't gardening so therapeutic?? We moved house last year and have been doing a bit of gardening recently. It's our first house together and we owned a flat back in Bristol. Now living in the beautiful Cotswolds.

My boyfriend loves cheesecake, beer and beer gardens. We go to many beer festivals, so we are missing that at the moment!!

Lottie82 · May 14, 2020 8:36AM

VRob123 · May 14, 2020 9:04AM

Wow you’ve made such a difference! It’s great for the mind to get outside and garden, I find crocheting therapeutic too which is why I do it.

Although we had a frost last night and I don’t think my squash plants made it 🤦‍♀️, damn.

The Cotswolds must be beautiful at the moment! We live in the Vale of Belvoir in Nottinghamshire. I feel for everyone in lockdown in cities without a garden.

I’ve got some turkey eggs due to hatch next week 🦃 so that’s something to look forward to😊

you sound like you’re coping amazingly with having Aspergers and Unmedicated bipolar! Do you think being in lockdown has helped you relax and cope better? My BIL has bipolar and apart from a little wobble early in lockdown seems to be so much improved! X

Lottie82 · May 14, 2020 9:14AM

VRob123 Apparently I have green fingers like my mum!! There were more weeds than plants!! I'm working on the front garden today, so looking forward to that!

So glad that you enjoy your crochet, it looks too complicated for me!! The turkey eggs sound so exciting! You should share photos when they have hatched!!

I think having my boyfriend here has helped, which has been great for me. He's working in our dining room, so he's in the background, rather than getting under my feet!! He's there if I need him.

How's your lock down going, are you working? Is your husband working from home?

VRob123 · May 14, 2020 11:53AM

I’ll definitely share photos when they pop out! My lockdown is ok thank you, I run a kitchen at the high school in our village so not much I can do apart from a little paperwork. Husband works for BT so he’s been going to work but he works up poles and in green boxes so doesn’t really see anybody. He doesn’t like being cooped up (plus he’s untidy) so I’m glad he’s been at work 🤣. What do you and your boyfriend do?

Lottie82 · May 14, 2020 6:09PM

VRob123 You have given me something to look forward to!! lol My boyfriend is a bit mess too. But then I have tidy ocd, so everyone is messy by my standards!! lol

My boyfriend is an agile scrum master!! It's basically a system where people work more effectively and with common sense. Because the majority of companies do not to that!! lol

I am currently unemployed as I trained as a hairdresser for two years. Got a job and my back got incredibly painful. So I'm trying to think of a job I can do, bit I'm stumped!! I'm 37 and fed up of retraining!!

VRob123 · May 14, 2020 7:01PM

Agile scrum master sounds like an amazing job title 🤣! I wonder if you could do a job cutting & styling wigs for cancer patients and such through the post 🤔, May be a bit easier on the back. X

Lottie82 · May 14, 2020 7:25PM

He's finding the job really stressful at the moment, as he's having to make people redundant. He was up until 1 this morning.

The wig idea sounds fantastic, but I think that the hairdresser would put the wig on the person, then cut the hair. I talked to my mum about it and she said she was going to get her hairdresser to do it for her. Any other job suggestions would be good!!

How's the paperwork going?

Pregnancy loss at six weeks

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