Ripening hurts like hell!

I'm really frustrated and need to know if this has happened to anyone else before. I had a show on Sat morning followed by mild contractions which got stronger throughout the day and night. then stopped completely Sun morn. Had a sleep, then contractions started again late that night - haven't slept all night as pain is strong. Contractions are irregular though - averaging at 5-10mins apart. Midwife came to visit this morning (I'm was hoping for a home birth) just to tell me that she wont even check me out to see if I've dilated at all cos it sounds like my cervix is still ripening, so I'm not even in proper labour yet. I can't believe how painful it is now - how will it be when I actually start full labour?? I was under the impression ripening just happened and didn't hurt (well not to this extent). Just really deflated now cos when I first saw the show on Sat morn I was convinced I'd see my baby by the end of the weekend but now it looks like it wont be arriving for days. (((((((