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Ectopic pregnancy


I don't really know why i'm writing this but i feel like i just want to write it all down.

I went to the doctors and was congratulated on being 7 weeks pregnent, i'd had a small amount of spotting but the doctor said it's completly normal to experiance this in the first 3 months of pregnancy. Me and my hubby of 4 weeks went away smiling!

The spotting continued on and off for a week, not heavy just a bit when i wiped (sorry!) and i had no pain at all. Even thought the doctor had said that this was normal, we decided we wanted to see someone else.

I contacted the local hospital who have an early pregnancy unit. I had a transvaginal scan and they found nothing in my unterus but a mass on my left side. We got told it was probably an ectopic, i could'nt go home and would need surgery the day after. It was so much to take in, and still is.

Anyway, after the op the doctor told us it was a large ectopic and surprised i wasn't in pain.

It's now been 6 days since the operation to removed the baby and they had to take my left tube out as well.

What am i supposed to feel? Was the baby still alive when they had to take it out? Will it happen again? etc etc!

I feel better just for typing it out but my head is a bit of a muddly! Would really appriciate any info/stories/advice anyone has got to share.

Thanks xxx


  • Hi Gem, I'm really sorry you're going through this. I had an ectopic in February this year, and also had my left tube removed - so I do know how you feel.

    I don't know how much the hospital will have told you about what happened, but it sounds like you were very lucky if it was a large ectopic, as it could have ruptured and caused internal bleeding - which can be fatal.

    The day after my op, the thoughtless surgeon showed me photos of my op - "here is the left side with a mass, and here it is with your tube taken away and no mass". Turns out the "mass" they showed me was my baby, and while I can't be 100% sure, I think that the baby would have been alive before the op, as they have to operate to stop the baby from growing and rupturing your tubes.

    It's an awful thing to go through, and you have my sincere sympathy. I was on an emotional rollercoaster for a long time after - and it still hurts now to think about the baby that I lost.

    If you need to chat/rant/scream, we're all here for you.

    Look after yourself

  • Hi Gem

    It is an awful time for you and I totally understand, I find writing/talking about it helps my story is as follows:

    I had an ectopic last Nov it was an awful time for me as I'm sure it was for you - I had been seeing specialists at St Marys Hospital in London as I have had 5 previous miscarriages - they found out I had a septate uterus (uterus with a membrane down the middle) I had it operated on in the August and in the September we were given the go ahead to try again - By Nov I was pregnant again finally I thought we'll be able to have the baby we dreamed of. The night before our appointment we travelled down and stayed in a hotel but in the middle of the night I woke up in pain on my right side - luckily St Mary's has an A&E so we walked to the hospital and I was admitted - the next day at my appointment I was scanned and like you had a large mass but on my right tube - I was given an option of surgery or methotrexate injection which is what they use in cancer patients - basically it reaches the foreign body as they call it and break it down and then the tube expels it - like you I asked is the baby alive and they told me that my HCG levels indicated it was and that basically the injection or surgery would kill the baby but the way to look at it was either way it wouldn't survive and by stalling would put my life at risk - as I didn't want surgery to lose my tube I decided on the injection - it mean't I couldn't try again for three months but at least I kept my tube. I was closely monitored and my HCG levels were checked every 3 days before they went back to normal which then indicated all was normal again - In July this year I had a test done to check the tube wasn't damaged or blocked which to my relief it wasn't.

    I was lucky as the specialist was honest with me by telling me that yes the baby was alive but he made me realise that what ever choice I make the baby will not survive but in my mind I felt I had to kill something I wanted so desperately. I saw a councellor afterwards and she said whether it's a miscarriage or ectopic you are entitled to grieve for the loss of that child - in one sense an ectopic is harder as you have no choice but to lose the baby with a MC it happens and is out of your control but still it's a bereavement and should grieve for it never the less.

    As for happening again there is a 10-20% chance of happening again and you should be scanned early to check that pregnancy is in the right place - I am in that position now - I am having an early scan Fri to see if my pregnancy is in the right place I am so anxious and have convinced myself it's ectopic again but hope that all is ok but again it's not been easy my HCG levels have not risen as they would like which indicates ectopic but the scan will be the one that tells us all whats going on.

    It will be an emotional rollercoaster ride for you at the moment and there are things going round and round in your head so if you have any more questions or you need to rant or scream like poopygirl1 says were all here for you and my counsellor always says its better to talk than to bottle up.

    Thinking of you at this time

  • Thank you both for your replies.

    Poppygir1, the hospital didnt really give me any help or infomation after, they certanly didnt show me pictures, how awful for you.

    Hep37, You are right about the grieving, my body is starting to get back to normal and now it's my head i need to sort out. I'm not the best at talking about whats going on in there but i will try!

    I will be keeping everything crossed for you on friday, please let me know how it goes.

    Thanks again ladies,

  • Hi sweetie, I'm really sorry to hear you had to go through this. I know how hard it is as I had an ectopic in September 2008.

    I too had spotting, but eventually I did have pain aswell and was admitted to hospital. At first they couldn't see anything on the scans but eventually they saw the baby in my right tube, which I had to have removed

    I was shown pictures which I couldn't really take in as I was still woozy. I was told that I was at higher risk of it happening again, and that whenever I fell pregnant in the future I have to go for early scans to check the baby is in the right place, so I don't risk losing my other tube

    If I'm honest, after all the research I have done into it since, I don't think I am at a higher risk of having another. I was in none of the risk groups so all I can think is that from birth I have had one dodgy tube, which is now gone and my other tube is fine

    I was also told to leave it a month before trying again. It's very personal to everyone but for me, I wanted to try again pretty much straight away. I was petrified that having lost my tube, I would find it difficult to conceive again. I did loads of research that showed that an egg from the ovary on the side without a tube can cross over and go down the remaining tube, which made me feel a bit better about things.

    A terrible thing happened to me, but I consider myself very fortunate- I fell pregnant again on my 2nd cycle after the op, and after those petrifying early scans, I gave birth to my daughter in July 2009

    I hope that you begin to feel a bit better soon, take your time to grieve, and for me it was important that people knew about it so they made allowances for it- I didn't want people to not know about my baby

    Big hugs to you xxx
  • I am so sorry. I to had an ectopic. Mine was one year and 4 days ago. I had suspected I was pregnant but had a period and then started bleeding again to days after it stopped and had horrible pain on my left side so I went to the hospital and found out I was pregnant. They did a ultrasound but couldn't see any thing. They could not figure out how far along I was cause I had a period just a few days befor. They couldn't see anything so they told me to make an apt with my doctor, she ran a test and my numbers had doubled, I was so happy! I found out on the 8th after that the pain and bleeding got worse I was sure I was lossing my baby so I kept going to the hospital trying to get help and they would do a blood test and a exam and send me home. One of the test showed my numbers had went down so for a whole day I was in shock then the next day the numbers had doubled! So I went in for a ultrasound on the 16th and the lady who did it was so rude! She had no compassion, I wanted my mom to come in with me cause I was scared and she won't allow it, then she was jamming that stick thing into my tube and I could barely walk after that. Again they didn't see the baby. My doc called me that evening and told me she wanted me to see a friend of hers (another ob) and she had made me an apt, so I went to work that night and could barely stand! After a hr I asked to go home, trouble was it was my new bosses first night solo and was scared the work won't get done and told me I couldn't leave so I told her a had to or I was going to pass out and she let me go but acted all mad. The next day I went to my apt at 2, by 2:30 she was showing my results and by 3 I was being sent to the hospital, then by 4 I was being taken back for surgery. I lost my left tube. She was very shocked at how big my tub was, it was starting to rupture. She shows all her med students my pics. I also didn't get told much and had to make the decision to let my baby go and I'm still not over it. Sorry my stories so long. It felt good to tell it though. I'd lovd to know how you all are now please? I have so many questions and need someone who understands.
  • I experienced my ectopic pregnancy in oct 2013. My tube had actually already ruptured when it was determined and I was immediately taken into surgery. Being my first surgery ever and knowing that my life was at risk was terrifying but knowing I would no longer be pregnant post surgery was heartbreaking. My first pregnancy 14yrs ago resulted in a miscarriage after one month but this somehow made me feel a different way. To know that this baby was actually growing inside me and I had adjusted to the idea of being pregnant again after so long was devastating. (My girls were 12 & 9 at the time). It's still hard at times to understand why it had to happen but I don't question the will of God. Thanks ladies for sharing your stories.

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