i feel rubbish:(

3girlywhirlys · Mar 24, 2008 7:32PM

Hi i am feeling very close to tears and im finding that very hard as i never cry i feel so drained all i want to do is sleep.im lucky Lexie is a good baby but sometimes i think she would be better off with her dad which i know is a mad thought as hes not very hands on she is five months old and he has fed her 10 times max and still doesnt know how to sterilise anything and he took her out in her pjs which i thought was wrong.he said tonight that hes depressed he hasnt got anything to be depressed about he still gets to do what he wants whenever he wants i havent really had a break away from Lexie in the whole five months an hour here and there but she goes into meltdown after 40mins if im not there i really think im at breaking point or very very close to it im thinking of giving up bf to try and get him to help more but i think thats just wishfull thinking.i just feel at rock bottom today this time last week i was quite happy as we had had a great day took Lexie swimming for the first time and she loved it.i know it sounds like im moaning but im finding it hard to put what im feeling into words.oh well ive gone on enough i hope everyone else is ok,
take care
Lin

becky25 · Mar 23, 2008 11:00AM

hi lin,how are you feelin today? it sounds to me like you need some proper relaxation time.do you have family or friends that would look after lexie for a few hours so you could do something for you like having a nice soak in the bath or getting your hair done,or even just visiting friends on your own.if after 40 mins she wants you ,be brave and let whoever is looking after her deal with the cryin,she will calm down eventually,i think if you enjoy breastfeeding and you give it up then you will regret it and that will make you feel worse.i hav an 8year old boy jordan,a daugher lauren who is 5 next month and an 8week old boy called bailey.ive been diagnosed with pnd,and i was having a bad day yesterday too and it was for no reason,it was my 26th bday and my partner and kids ran around after me to make sure i had a nice day,but i was in my usual snappy mood,iand i spent most of the day in tears thinking that my gorgeous oh and beautifull kids would be better off without me,we had planned to go bowling together and my mum was going to have bailey,but i just ruined our plans by refusing to go because i felt so crap.my partner in the end told me that he understood that i was feelin down but he thought i was bein selfish as him and the kids hadnt actually done anythin wrong and they wanted to spend some quality time with me.i felt so guilty that i burst into tears and ended up havin a real big heart to heart with him and felt much better after.I think im gettin so snappy because i bf,and so im up in the night feeding then because my baby suffers with colic i have to spend about half hour tryin to get his wind up after every feed,but when hes asleep in the day i cant sleep.anyway im not guna bore you anymore,im feelin much better today so dont want to spend it moaning!!! hope you feelin better too. becky xx

MummyX5 · Mar 23, 2008 7:26PM

Hi Lin,

Let it all out hun!! Worse thing you can do it bottle it up. I word in your oh favour hun - he may very well feel a little depressed as you are having to spend so much time with your little girl that he feels left out. Going out in pj's isn't the end of the world but probably got to you coz you feel so tired and run down. Is there anyway in which you could get him more hands on with other stuff? Lexie will probably make a fuss the 1st few times as she so used to you doing everything but she'll soon get used to it and dad will feel like he's helping you out a bit more.

A break of any sort will be welcome, I'm sure, as probably would a cpl hours just you and oh - can your parents babysit one evening? You don't have to go anywhere fancy but some together time will do wonders for you both. It's hard I know, especially as you're bf still but if you can go out together, go for it.

Hi Becky,
How you doing this evening? It's all go when you have a housefull - I know, I have 4 and another on the way

Still, it's good that your oh understands it's not exactly ur fault and is there for you.....my oh is the same. Has moments where it gets to him, I know but being able to talk things thru does help.

Hope things improve a little for you both, getting it out of your system on here helps too - coz we all understand

3girlywhirlys · Mar 23, 2008 9:19PM

Hi well i felt a bit better today i took Lexie swimming on my own as oh was busy watching football but she loved it and i know i can take her own my own no problem now so thats good, and she was asleep after so my mum said she would have her for an hour so we went for a drink in the pub we met in and saw some friends we hadnt seen for ages so it was a good day

Hi Becky i hope you had a good day today some days it can be really hard.how long is your lo sleeping before he needs feeding again?its a hard slog when bf isint it, Lexie is almost 23wks and only wakes once now so not too bad.
Hi Millie thanks it does help to have a rant on here congrats on number 5 wow do you find it hard with 4 already?i would love at least 3 i loved being pregnant

take care
Lin

MummyX5 · Mar 24, 2008 4:16AM

Glad you had a better day yesterday hun

It is hard, especially when they're all home at the same time and oh is at work, like Good Friday and today lol but when they all sit and try n teach Alex, my youngest, to play ball together, it's a lovely sight

Good luck on ur pursuit of 3

we didn't plan on 5 but it just felt right.

Stay positive, take care
Mandi

no3bump · Mar 24, 2008 10:29AM

Hi hun, i posted you a reply yesterday but it didnt bloody load up! Glad your feeling better today. How is Lexie? x

becky25 · Mar 24, 2008 7:32PM

hi lin and mandy,how are you both? baileys goin through a phase were he wants feeding every 2 1/2 hours in the night,sooooo tiring.would just love to have a full nights sleep!!!just 1!!! have had another good day today,it was my oh who got out on the wrong side of the bed today!!!glad to hear your feelin better lin. beckyxx

i feel rubbish:(

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