We had an awful start to bfing but through sheer determination and loads of support it worked out and ie exclusively fed for 6 months...don't have much choice as he's a bottle refuser! One massive advantage is sometimes when a baby is crying, especially to start with, you can just whip the boob out and see if they're hungry as sometimes it is easy to not know what is wrong and if they're not you've not wasted anything! It's a very personal decision though and every mother does what is best for them and baby, there's enough guilt tripping done when you have a baby so no point adding to it ;-)
i assume people want to bf as they have the boobs so they may as well use them
i bf both mine as its proven to be the best for babys and mums (significantly reduces breast cancer risk etc), in saying that it was not as easy as i thought, its regularly made out to be natural and the thing you should do, but by god its hard (not everyone finds it hard but in the early days both my boys had TT so it was quite painful then Isaac was a regular feeder)
the whole not knowing how many oz they take didnt bother me, they had wet and dirty nappies and were putting on weight so they were obviously getting enough
my h, mil and mum regularly fed them with expressed milk so i did get some time off
I'm currently breastfeeding my 3rd and even my HV keeps going on about how hard it must be to BF and have 2 other young children to look after. Kind of annoying me a bit as you'd think she would be more supportive rather than looking for the negative and I actually think I'd find it more difficult if I was formula feeding. I can BF and still do things with my other hand like make drinks, play jigsaws, colour in pctures etc with the other 2. I imagine this would be more difficult if I had a bottle to hold. And when I'm rushing about to get out the house I don't need to remember to sort bottles to take with me.
My MW was telling me that BF also has fantastic Benefits for the mum as well including repairing any risk that might have happened during pregnancy regarding osteoporosis. I had no idea!
Breast is best, there's no argument to be had there. However babies will certainly thrive on formula, it's not poison!
I failed to breast feed, I had no milk and nothing I did increased my supply so I ended up having to ff and I felt like I'd failed as a mother. I felt awful, it was a stressful time. However saying that if we were to have another baby I would try and bf again. I think people forget that it takes two to bf, both mother and baby have to be happy.
Why not just give it a go and see how it goes? You can mix feed, all my antenatal group got their partners to give a bottle of formula in the evening, or you could express.
I don't have anything more to add to what's already been said I totally agree with all of it. You just don't know how you'll find it til you try it. It's blimmin hard going for the first few weeks but so worth it once established. I fed Isla for eight months and plan to aim for 6 with the next. It's something I'm really proud of.
I was 1 of the lucky ones who had a very easy time of breast feeding, didn't find any problems except very sore boobs when my milk came in & lots of fun leaking & 1 cracked nipple in 18 months of breast feeding. I fed whenever she needed it & would happily feed in public. I expressed from my hubby to feed her & continued to express when I went back to work 2 days a week when she was 7 months old. I went to a breast feeding support group (the Le Leche League) before I had my daughter so I was able to actually see real mothers breast feeding & find out about what the pitfalls might be. I always wanted to breast feed as I knew all the benefits & obviously it's why we have boobs! But I always said that if it didn't work then I would obviously use formula (although knowing about the service now I would probably try using donor breast milk before using formula). I would recommend going in with an open mind. Try it & see how you get on & remember, for every horror story you read about breast feeding there are positive stories like mine.
I've decided that because BF was so hard last time, I'm going to be on track for an easy as pie BF-re next time, right? (A girl can wish).
Seriously though I read this amazing story recently, to summarise.. about a two-men couple adopting a baby (one a paediatrician), and they were so keen that the baby bf that they had someone express for them, and paid to dry freeze and ship the milk overnight from the expressed to them, and the baby fed from expressed milk exclusively for six months, made me realise just what lengths some people would go to, to give their baby BM, makes me feel bad I didn't try harder, though I know I was in no state to, but next time, I know how hard it will be, I'll be even more determined if that makes sense, such a fab story.
o god LM please dont feel bad! if you were sat saying 'well i jsut dont feed my baby' then yes, you should feel bad, but as it was you couldnt BF and gave a perfectly reasonable and safe alternative. i dont think many people would even think to have milk shipped in, i think with L if it hadnt worked out id have moved to FF but with I because i was assuming that everything that could go wrong would go wrong i looked into donated milk but was told it was only for NICU babies so if it hadnt worked out then id have FF too.
What everyone else has said; I believe breastmilk is best so I am hoping to BF and will try my hardest, take advice if I'm struggling and so on, but formula is made to the best that non-breastmilk can be made to, and I hope that if BF doesn't work out for us then I won't feel too guilty for FF.
I really hope it does work for us, not just for baby's benefit (although obviously this is my main priority) or for my health benefits (reduced cancer risks, help uterus contract quicker, weight loss, sure there's more!) but also for my convenience. My main hobby is horses, and baby will be coming to the yard with me twice a day (and spending quite a bit of time there during maternity leave) and the idea of having to faff around trying to mix / warm FF etc fills me with dread - if we're in the field, 20 mins walk from the kitchen, I want to be able to just whack a boob out! If it doesn't work, we'll manage... but convenience is a major draw.
I think the main thing I am aiming for is feeding my baby my own colostrum, as it is SO rich in antibodies. If I can manage 3 days of BF to get this colostrum in, then that's the minimum I really hope for.
I just wrote a big (rather brave) reply to this explaining my reasoning behind exclusively formula feeding P and then my phone battery died before I could post it......I considered it a sign
I chose not to breast feed right from the start. It's not something I wanted to do, I'm not sure why I just knew I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it. I think if you'd like to try it, go for it! But don't be disheartened if you have to use formula.
I think you need to go into it with an open mind, as everything baby related. I tried with both of mine, longer with E admittedly. It wasn't working for us for various reasons and we chose to go the formula route. With E I beat myself up about it for ages because in my eyes I'd failed. With J I knew it was the right decision for me.
Breastfeeding has so many benefits, it's going to be a positive thing to try it. But don't feel like it's the be all, end all if it doesn't work for whatever reason.
Breast v formula feeding is always such an emotive one. Whilst I would always agree that breast milk is best, I don't necessarily think that breast feeding always is.
My journey was pretty awful - I was dead set that I would bf ethan, then he arrived 6 weeks early and with no sucking reflex. I struggled to feed for 5 weeks, expressed, bottle fed, two hours in every 3 was spent trying to bf. I ended up with severe pnd as a result - two years of drugs, counselling, CBT to get through it. I was suicidal and walked out of the house on a weekly basis. All as a result of breastfeeding.
With number two I agreed to speak to a bf counsellor and eventually agreed to try just one feed. After the first two hellish weeks (reflux, taking 8 hours to latch etc) and brilliant support I did manage to establish bfing. It has been extremely hard work but I've loved it, and its definitely easier than formula (except I must disagree with HF - a bf baby in a traffic jam is awful). Unfortunately my journey has ended much earlier than I hoped this time and left me feeling a failure again, but I'm better able to cope.
I guess I'm trying to say that if you want to try bfing then do, when it works it is the greatest feeling on earth, but it isn't the be-all and end-all, and don't put too much pressure on yourself - go just one feed at a time, as every one is an achievement.
Replies
We had an awful start to bfing but through sheer determination and loads of support it worked out and ie exclusively fed for 6 months...don't have much choice as he's a bottle refuser! One massive advantage is sometimes when a baby is crying, especially to start with, you can just whip the boob out and see if they're hungry as sometimes it is easy to not know what is wrong and if they're not you've not wasted anything! It's a very personal decision though and every mother does what is best for them and baby, there's enough guilt tripping done when you have a baby so no point adding to it ;-)
i assume people want to bf as they have the boobs so they may as well use them
i bf both mine as its proven to be the best for babys and mums (significantly reduces breast cancer risk etc), in saying that it was not as easy as i thought, its regularly made out to be natural and the thing you should do, but by god its hard (not everyone finds it hard but in the early days both my boys had TT so it was quite painful then Isaac was a regular feeder)
the whole not knowing how many oz they take didnt bother me, they had wet and dirty nappies and were putting on weight so they were obviously getting enough
my h, mil and mum regularly fed them with expressed milk so i did get some time off
I'm currently breastfeeding my 3rd and even my HV keeps going on about how hard it must be to BF and have 2 other young children to look after. Kind of annoying me a bit as you'd think she would be more supportive rather than looking for the negative and I actually think I'd find it more difficult if I was formula feeding. I can BF and still do things with my other hand like make drinks, play jigsaws, colour in pctures etc with the other 2. I imagine this would be more difficult if I had a bottle to hold. And when I'm rushing about to get out the house I don't need to remember to sort bottles to take with me.
Another good reason to BF is the £££ it saves you, formula is expensive!
My MW was telling me that BF also has fantastic Benefits for the mum as well including repairing any risk that might have happened during pregnancy regarding osteoporosis. I had no idea!
Breast is best, there's no argument to be had there. However babies will certainly thrive on formula, it's not poison!
I failed to breast feed, I had no milk and nothing I did increased my supply so I ended up having to ff and I felt like I'd failed as a mother. I felt awful, it was a stressful time. However saying that if we were to have another baby I would try and bf again. I think people forget that it takes two to bf, both mother and baby have to be happy.
Why not just give it a go and see how it goes? You can mix feed, all my antenatal group got their partners to give a bottle of formula in the evening, or you could express.
I don't have anything more to add to what's already been said I totally agree with all of it. You just don't know how you'll find it til you try it. It's blimmin hard going for the first few weeks but so worth it once established. I fed Isla for eight months and plan to aim for 6 with the next. It's something I'm really proud of.
I was 1 of the lucky ones who had a very easy time of breast feeding, didn't find any problems except very sore boobs when my milk came in & lots of fun leaking & 1 cracked nipple in 18 months of breast feeding. I fed whenever she needed it & would happily feed in public. I expressed from my hubby to feed her & continued to express when I went back to work 2 days a week when she was 7 months old. I went to a breast feeding support group (the Le Leche League) before I had my daughter so I was able to actually see real mothers breast feeding & find out about what the pitfalls might be. I always wanted to breast feed as I knew all the benefits & obviously it's why we have boobs! But I always said that if it didn't work then I would obviously use formula (although knowing about the service now I would probably try using donor breast milk before using formula). I would recommend going in with an open mind. Try it & see how you get on & remember, for every horror story you read about breast feeding there are positive stories like mine.
I've decided that because BF was so hard last time, I'm going to be on track for an easy as pie BF-re next time, right? (A girl can wish).
Seriously though I read this amazing story recently, to summarise.. about a two-men couple adopting a baby (one a paediatrician), and they were so keen that the baby bf that they had someone express for them, and paid to dry freeze and ship the milk overnight from the expressed to them, and the baby fed from expressed milk exclusively for six months, made me realise just what lengths some people would go to, to give their baby BM, makes me feel bad I didn't try harder, though I know I was in no state to, but next time, I know how hard it will be, I'll be even more determined if that makes sense, such a fab story.
o god LM please dont feel bad! if you were sat saying 'well i jsut dont feed my baby' then yes, you should feel bad, but as it was you couldnt BF and gave a perfectly reasonable and safe alternative. i dont think many people would even think to have milk shipped in, i think with L if it hadnt worked out id have moved to FF but with I because i was assuming that everything that could go wrong would go wrong i looked into donated milk but was told it was only for NICU babies so if it hadnt worked out then id have FF too.
dont beat yourself up honestly,
What everyone else has said; I believe breastmilk is best so I am hoping to BF and will try my hardest, take advice if I'm struggling and so on, but formula is made to the best that non-breastmilk can be made to, and I hope that if BF doesn't work out for us then I won't feel too guilty for FF.
I really hope it does work for us, not just for baby's benefit (although obviously this is my main priority) or for my health benefits (reduced cancer risks, help uterus contract quicker, weight loss, sure there's more!) but also for my convenience. My main hobby is horses, and baby will be coming to the yard with me twice a day (and spending quite a bit of time there during maternity leave) and the idea of having to faff around trying to mix / warm FF etc fills me with dread - if we're in the field, 20 mins walk from the kitchen, I want to be able to just whack a boob out! If it doesn't work, we'll manage... but convenience is a major draw.
I think the main thing I am aiming for is feeding my baby my own colostrum, as it is SO rich in antibodies. If I can manage 3 days of BF to get this colostrum in, then that's the minimum I really hope for.
I just wrote a big (rather brave) reply to this explaining my reasoning behind exclusively formula feeding P and then my phone battery died before I could post it......I considered it a sign
Aside from the gazzilon benefits mentioned already ......
Its FREE
Mother Nature sorted it so thats its perfectly designed for babies, plus it comes out at the correct temperature!
Its always available whenever required be it during the day/night or stuck in a mammoth traffic jam ...... etc!
I chose not to breast feed right from the start. It's not something I wanted to do, I'm not sure why I just knew I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it. I think if you'd like to try it, go for it! But don't be disheartened if you have to use formula.
Totally understand mcsquirtle. I think it's a very personal choice and isn't for everybody :
Thanks CP. I guess this mommy guilt has a lot to answer to. Mind you it'd always be something wouldn't it.
I think you need to go into it with an open mind, as everything baby related. I tried with both of mine, longer with E admittedly. It wasn't working for us for various reasons and we chose to go the formula route. With E I beat myself up about it for ages because in my eyes I'd failed. With J I knew it was the right decision for me.
Breastfeeding has so many benefits, it's going to be a positive thing to try it. But don't feel like it's the be all, end all if it doesn't work for whatever reason.
Breast v formula feeding is always such an emotive one. Whilst I would always agree that breast milk is best, I don't necessarily think that breast feeding always is.
My journey was pretty awful - I was dead set that I would bf ethan, then he arrived 6 weeks early and with no sucking reflex. I struggled to feed for 5 weeks, expressed, bottle fed, two hours in every 3 was spent trying to bf. I ended up with severe pnd as a result - two years of drugs, counselling, CBT to get through it. I was suicidal and walked out of the house on a weekly basis. All as a result of breastfeeding.
With number two I agreed to speak to a bf counsellor and eventually agreed to try just one feed. After the first two hellish weeks (reflux, taking 8 hours to latch etc) and brilliant support I did manage to establish bfing. It has been extremely hard work but I've loved it, and its definitely easier than formula (except I must disagree with HF - a bf baby in a traffic jam is awful). Unfortunately my journey has ended much earlier than I hoped this time and left me feeling a failure again, but I'm better able to cope.
I guess I'm trying to say that if you want to try bfing then do, when it works it is the greatest feeling on earth, but it isn't the be-all and end-all, and don't put too much pressure on yourself - go just one feed at a time, as every one is an achievement.