Hello again on the birth and labour forum there is a post from sportfish her husband is serving in irrac it might be worth chatting to her somebody in a similar situation x
jus so you all know - the question i asked my midwife about leaving my baby late - was just a thought. after being told that induction wasnt an option (i have friends up north that have been induced for non-medical reasons so i didnt think that my question was selfish etc or that i would be considered in such a way for even asking) it was the next question that popped into my head. i dont know why i feel the need to explain my actions to any one - but i am! OBVIOUSLY my child comes first - for those of you stupid enough to think otherwise. i just wanted my husband to be at the birth - which i do not see any wrong in. i realise i am not the only person with OH away, that doesn't stop me feeling the way i do in that i want him there!
thanks to those ladies that have offered support x
Well, if I seemed like I was judging, that was not how it was supposed to be, I was simply trying to alert you to a reason as to why the midwife was so against it, and highlight the dangers of going so far overdue. I totally understand you wanting your hubby there, we all want our partners there, but the way it read, it seemed like that was all that mattered. You never asked about dangers of going so far over etc. You also never said that you had friends that had been induced for non medical reasons. If you don't give all the information then things like that will happen i guess. I don't think asking to be induced was selfish, i think trying to keep baby in for 42 weeks and longer is, but that is simply MY opnion and it stands for shit at the end of the day. You will do as you feel is right.
where UP NORTH do you know mates? Are you a northern gal yourself. I only ask as I am for Middlesbrough though live abroad at moment.
Anyway, just wanted to wish you good luck and really hope OH gets to see this most special time in your lives. I think its sad that the dont get leave to see their kids come into the world. Out fighting for Queen and Country and yet they get little thanks and cant even be there to see their wife give birth.
I agree, it sucks big time. Men should be allowed to come back if only for a while to see the baby. I mean, other guys are allowed and get paternity leave. Does he get that?
dee dee - not a northern girl myself jus from moving around lots - i have friends from all over. we were in notts just before we moved here - that is as far north as i've lived so far! ha! my OH does get paternity leave yes - at the end of his course which is two years long! army are very clever in that the dont stop you from taking paternity leave, only dictate when you can have it. so our son will be 18mths old! i think it depends on whether the men are actually needed or not as to whether they are allowed home etc.
I have always been a bit naive as to what our Soldiers really go through until I watched Ross Kemp in Afghanistan - I think the least they deserve is to be able to come back and see their children born! It is unbelievable that his paternity leave is 18mths afterwards. Good luck Love Lee xxxxx
Replies
jus so you all know - the question i asked my midwife about leaving my baby late - was just a thought. after being told that induction wasnt an option (i have friends up north that have been induced for non-medical reasons so i didnt think that my question was selfish etc or that i would be considered in such a way for even asking) it was the next question that popped into my head. i dont know why i feel the need to explain my actions to any one - but i am! OBVIOUSLY my child comes first - for those of you stupid enough to think otherwise. i just wanted my husband to be at the birth - which i do not see any wrong in. i realise i am not the only person with OH away, that doesn't stop me feeling the way i do in that i want him there!
thanks to those ladies that have offered support x
I totally understand you wanting your hubby there, we all want our partners there, but the way it read, it seemed like that was all that mattered. You never asked about dangers of going so far over etc. You also never said that you had friends that had been induced for non medical reasons. If you don't give all the information then things like that will happen i guess.
I don't think asking to be induced was selfish, i think trying to keep baby in for 42 weeks and longer is, but that is simply MY opnion and it stands for shit at the end of the day. You will do as you feel is right.
where UP NORTH do you know mates? Are you a northern gal yourself. I only ask as I am for Middlesbrough though live abroad at moment.
Anyway, just wanted to wish you good luck and really hope OH gets to see this most special time in your lives. I think its sad that the dont get leave to see their kids come into the world. Out fighting for Queen and Country and yet they get little thanks and cant even be there to see their wife give birth.
Good Luck and let us know how you get on
d xxx
my OH does get paternity leave yes - at the end of his course which is two years long! army are very clever in that the dont stop you from taking paternity leave, only dictate when you can have it. so our son will be 18mths old! i think it depends on whether the men are actually needed or not as to whether they are allowed home etc.
Sneaky fuckers the forces.
My mate is in the Army and he missed both his kids being born as he was on tours.
Good luck
Love Lee
xxxxx