Boyfriend thinking his mam has equal rights as my mam
hi everyone,
first time I have written one of these but really needed some advice because it’s going to end my relationship. Since Poppy was born in March my boyfriend has changed... all he seems to care about is that his mam has equal rights as my mam. For example if poppy stays at my mams one night he will then expect her to stay at his mams the next week... or if we are going away he expect to ask his mam if she can mind her first and thinks it’s fine to not ask my mam. He is one of 14 children and his mam has 6 daughters 4 with children herself so she has 12 grandchildren all of which she sees on a regular basis. My mam has me and my brother and my daughter is the only daughter in our family my brother has two sons. So any sort of priority I am giving my mam he is trying to take it away. what am I supposed to do it’s causing so many problem I am actually drained. He is also expecting me to leave my mam and dad with no one at Xmas so we can have xmas dinner round his mams because he wants to share everything... my poor mam is absolutely gutted.... has anyone else been through this ? Xxxx
Replies
Technically she is equal. Just because your mum has less grandchildren does not make her priority. You should do what we do at Christmas. 1 year we go to my hubbys mum and dad's for dinner and the year after we go to my mum's for dinner. My hubby has one sister and they only have one child in their whole family which is my 2 year old. We do tend to see them more than my family but it's because they invite us round for a meal at least once a week. He gets spoilt whilst he's there but after all it's their only grandchild. It doesn't mean they get priority though. I think you both need to be fair when it comes to these decisions. Back to the Christmas day thing we go round to both parents on Christmas day but we just alternate where we have dinner. So you don't have to not see your parents just because your not eating there. Unless they live miles apart that is 😊
Neither grandparent should have priority. To be honest I think you should be thankful that your daughter has 2 sets of grandparents that want to spend so much time with her.