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Angry partner and just pregnant

edited Oct 25, 2019 9:07AM in Relationships
I've been with my boyfriend about 2 and a half years.  He has always been hot headed and shouts at his mum and as soon as he got comfortable he started shouting at me. I guess we make excuses for him and blame his health problems. There's been so many times Ive wanted to break up because of his out of control tantrums. He always blames me or his mum for winding him up which  is not true and I do stick up for myself. I break up with him and he begs to take him back and I do ...... Because of one of his health problems we BELIEVED he couldn't father children but now I am unexpectedly pregnant. His 1st and my 3rd. I desperately want him to address his anger issues and get help before the baby comes. He seems to think he will be an amazing and patient dad but I don't think it will work out like that when the reality of a screaming baby comes along.
There's always some excuse why he hasnt called his doctor yet. I'm sick of it. I don't know what to do. All I know is I am dreading his tantrums when the baby comes and its just going to be 100% harder to break away from him when I have his child. When he loses it he doesn't care who hears and he's kicked off in front of my children before with no regard for anyone's feelings but himself. Writing this I feel so hurt by it all. But I feel I'm stuck. I don't know what to do. 


  • Hi.

    Firstly I am sorry you are going through this. It is very difficult when you love some one and really want to think the best of them to know what is best to do. It sounds to me that in your heart you feel like you ought to leave. I do not know your circumstances but from what you say as much as you want your partner to change you dont believe he will. I would really recommend speaking to womens aid. You may not feel like your relationship is abusive but they are really supportive and can help you make decisions. They never force you to leave someone and can be lovely to help talk things through. They are also bery private so your partner does not need to know that you have spoken to them. I went through a very difficult divorce and they were fantastic.

    you will never be stuck. It seems that way but there is always a way out. It can be a battle but please dont ever think that you have to say. You just need to know your options.

    if your partner will not go an see a doctor maybe have a look to see if you can find any courses to help. You may have to just be honest and tell him you are not happy and he needs to try and make a change or you will leave.

    i hope you sort things out. You can always message me if you need someone to talk to
  • Thank you for your reply. We are back on track now.  We are always up and down! He's made an appointment with a councillor x
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