Forum home Family life & relationships Single parents

was dumped when pregnant, now have a 7 week beautiful baby!!

Have had a nitemare of a pregnancy, my partner of 12 years left me when i was 8 weeks pregnant. Not great ha ha. Still havin a hell of a time with him, he wants to be involved but on his terms so could really do with some friendly advice on how to deal with it all. On a positive thou, i have the most gorgeous little girl i could have ever only of wished for. It is hard work and would love to hear from any other single moms or anyone who understands bout copin on 2 hours sleep ha ha.

Please get in touch if u have big bags around ur eyes 2!!



  • Poor you it will get better the same happend to my sister an know she has her own house an has got a new boyfriend who she has been with for 2years an there having a baby so things will get better
  • Poor you things will get better the same happend to my sister an know she is very happy
  • Congrats on your little girl. As for the situation with ur ex I wouldn't worry too much about him. I would put my energy into lo and if he wants to see her then ok.

    I wouldn't allow him to mess me around tho- start off as you mean to continue. I would suggest to him that the two meet for a chat about your daughter. I would then make it clear to him that he can visit x number of days/evenings each week. If you feel he is capable to look after her on his own then he could take her out for an afternoon for example. Other than this he should have no need to contact you- assure him that if there is ever anything wrong he will be the first to know.

    I would also make him aware that contact should be regular and on set days as it is best for your daughter to have a routine, if he messes about canceeling and trying to rearrange etc tell him that it doesn't suit. Anyone can have a genuine excuse once in a while but he can't expect you to organise your life and your babys around him.

    Don't take any nonsense from him- my sil split up with her partner 4 years ago and they still have rows about contact. I have experience of this from the mans point of view too. My oh has two children from a previuos marriage and his ex used to pester the life out of us. She would change days around to suit herself at the last minute and we used to keep them overnight on saturdays and leave them home at 11am sunday she was forever calling up and saying she wasn't home yet and could we keep them longer.

    I put my foot down and told her in not such nice word to stop taking the hand out of us. I informed her that we wud take the children set times- told her these times and told her to stop ringing my hubby unnecessarily (she wud ring him twice a day sumtimes and just for a chat!!!) I told her DO NOT RING US LEAVE US ALONE.

    Sorry about the rant but some people just don't take a hint and I know some of u mite think it wasn't my place but she wudn't listen to oh no matter how many times he told her this went on for 4 years. Now that I had my say it no longer happens.
  • I'm a single Mum to a gorgeous 14 week old little boy, My ex doesn't want to be involved at all, which I see is a good thing. I am worried tho that my little one will miss out, but i can give him enough love for two if not more.
    I found meeting lots of other mums in the local area has really helped as they are a great support network.
  • im a single mum too due babe no4 in april, it is hard and tiring but u get all the rewards image
    my ex is an a***hole so i try not to have much to do with him
    (he is apparently attempting to "win" me back)

    congratulations on the birth of ur daughter hun, u will cope just fine on ur own. xx
  • Hello KThom122. The rant made total sence. My OH ex is the same. I haven't as yet said anything to her face to face but it has got to the point that OH won't let me out the car on be around when she is as I will say something. She will only have contact through e-mail and I have sent a few to tell her to back off. All she wants is money and if she doesn't get she restricts access dispite all the court orders plus her new fella is rolling in it so what the problem is I don't know?!?!
    Flower29. I agree start as you mean to go on. If you meet with him make on neautral territory and do not take your lo. If the worst comes to the worst get a court order for access. Its extream and you may not need to use it, but the threat is always good. It worked on oh ex wife.
    Hope all goes well and congrats on your new lo. My daughter is 3weeks old.
    X X X
  • Hi,

    My partner of eight years has just split with me at 30 weeks pregnant and finding it hard to come to terms with. I already have a four year old daughter with him who at the moment he is still playing a part in her life, although it's a good thing it worries me what it will be like when the new baby arrives. I'm not sure how comfortable i am going to feel about him taking her. I'm beginning to think about how hard it's going to be bringing the baby up on my own with everything that's involved, i know that i am going to do the best i can and am hoping that it will be enough. My family have been really supportive but the whole ordeal has affected everyone. Would be nice to hear how others in this situation get through it so i know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
  • ahhhh beck, nice to meet you image haven't been through it but i do think often that things would be easier without o/h!! lol! especially when l/o was first born as he did nowt! i'm sure you'll do a great job and it's good that you'll have family to help out too x.
    dont know how i'd feel about ex having baby either, thats a horrible situation to be in image i'm sure there are others that can give you advice though xx.
Sign In or Register to comment.

Featured Discussions