Naive to want a September baby?

Hi Girls,
Please could I have your advice. I both got married and turned 36 last month. My husband is the same age. I have been taking medication during the summer which meant I had to be on the pill. I stopped taking both towards the beginning of September.

We really would love a September baby and had thought to start ttc at Christmas but I am in a dilemma whether to start taking the pill again until then because I understand a woman's fertility is at its highest level just after she stops taking it or whether we shouldn't wait because of my age?

Also, is it really the advantage that I think it may be to have a September baby anyway?

Your thoughts and opinions would be greatly appreciated
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Posts

  • hi there, firstly as far as i am aware through my own and other peoples experiences are that it can take a few months for your body to settle down and work 'naturally' after being on the pill - especially if you've been on it a while! The other things is it really isn't something you can 'plan' i would've loved a sept/oct baby but my last bfp before mc would've been due in feb 10, we are now ttc again, it will happen when it happens, it cant be planned. so many factors and things depend on a lil bean settling down and sticking it's unreal xxx
  • Hi

    I stopped Mercilion (low dose combined pill) last month, and got a +ve on OPKs on CD18.

    Stopped the pill previously (non TTC related) and I had 3 normal cycles (32 days, 28, 28 or near enough) and then a 50day plus cycle. So it looks like I'm doing the same thing this time.

    Its really difficult to say what is best, as everyone is different. I too heard that the first 3 cycles post pill you may be more fertile, and my doc said I could start ttc straight away.

    Nessie (12 DPO and fighting the POAS urge)


    [Modified by: - Nessie - on October 11, 2009 05:39 PM]

  • hi sage 7, i have come off my pill last month and will shortly have my first "real" period, then will be ttc. i understand it may take a while, so am hoping to conceiv in nov, but know it may be longer, can i ask what the advantages of having a serptember baby are? my son was born in sept, but never heard of that before??, take care x
  • hay there, like the others said it may take 1/2/3 or more months like you i planned a sept baby...... '09' that is..... when i stopped the pill it took 92days for myfirst af then went for 40+ days slowly down to a 28 day. I have been ttc for 14 months. Although when ttc my son i feel 1st month off the pill so it totallly depends xx

    Good luck Gems xx
  • Thank you girls so much for your comments.

    I am new on here and I am trying to get to grips with all the abbreviations! Have worked out mc tho, so sorry to read that rocky.

    I had thought that I would get to know my cycle if we didn't start ttc to December. I have no idea what it will be because it was not predictable when I was on the pill (loestrin 20). Might try ovulation sticks?

    Mrspointin we would love a september baby because it would mean he/she would be the eldest in their year at school and more physically and mentally well developed than their summer term born friends. I found it an advantage when I was at School but maybe that was just me.
  • Hi Sage7,

    there's a list on chatroom essentials of all the abbreviations which will help you on your way.

    I think the biggest lesson I've learny since being on here is that BFP will simply happen when it's supposed to, regardless of what we do when TTC, beleive me it's a very hard lesson but one I firmly believe in!

    As for September baby, I don't think it matters too much - if the baby were to born a little early, that would make it an August baby and one of the youngest in the year.

    I'm a July baby and must admit it hasn't affected by learning I don't think, I know do a professional job after gaining a high pass in my HND and 2.1 in my degree!

    Personally I wouldn;t start the pill again, I came off in May but couldn't start TTC for social reasons so used condoms until we started TTC late August

    xxx
  • sept - dec children do seem to have that advantage at school, but it isnt necessarily the case. lots of factors can affect how the child turns out. i was an oct baby and my bros were sept babies and we were all top sets at school. my sis was an august baby, very young in her year and was always in the bottom sets and generally hated school. she was also one of the smallest in her year. only the brightest kids do spanish and latin at the school i currently work at and the teachers for those said almost all the children's birthdays are before christmas. i have read about footballers at school being the oldest too as they are physically older. although i have recently been informed that june is the most popular birth month of premiership footballers. dont know how true that is. i did want to try for a sept-dec baby but my body decided to ovulate when it pleased, rather than when it shoudl have. my baby is due in march. saying that, my hubby was a march baby and he was grammer school educated. although all he has done all day is play on his ps3 so that may have been a waste of money! lol

    there are so many factors in the well being of your child, but you are one of the main ones. i see so many examples of terrible parenting and it often becomes really clear on parents evenings why the child is like they are. you dont sound like you wouldnt read to your child, or teach your child the basics so i wouldnt worry and just get bding.
  • I'm a feb baby got the highest result in ireland in my diploma and in top 2% of my degree year so bein younger didn't disadvantage me and I am a far cry from a brainiac in fact in work a few years aggo i was very shocked that the kettle didn't work m setting it on a wooden tablle not connected to the base unit prob would not have helped LOL

    Certainly there are some advantages my ds is a juky baby and in NI that makes him the oldest in his class and it has helped him as he was generally a v immature child for his age. All depends on the parents too and their interest in childs edication the while nature vs nurture argument etc etc xx
  • Thank you so much for all of your understanding replies. It certainly has given me reassurance that may be we should just see what happens!
    x
  • im a primary school teacher and you can tell the difference between a sept-dec baby and a july-aug baby
  • I came off the pill after 20 years, I was 36, rapidly approaching 37 and we started ttc last Christmas. Fortunately my cycles were relatively normal straight away, around 27 days with an 11 day LP. I would have loved a September baby for the same reasons as you, even though my brother was the youngest and brightest in his year!

    I have always thought that babies born around Christmas are the most unfortunate ones and I would never have planned to have one then. Yep, you guessed it, I'm due just before Christmas! Don't get me wrong, I am delighted to be pregnant but I would never have planned it like this. TTC is something you can't control and once I started there was no way on this earth I was going to stop. You soon realise that it can take years to conceive and I didn't feel I had the luxury of time to be choosy.

    Wishing you lots of luck with your decision xx
  • Personally if i were you i wouldn't go back on the pill. As others have said there's no knowing when you will actually concieve. You could fall pregnant straight away or it could take longer than anticipated...

    As for the Sept baby preference. I'd never really thought about it to be honest! lol! I myself was due to be born in October but was born in August so i was one of the youngest in my class and much smaller too. However, i think i did fine in school. I think i was an average student and i passed all of my GCSE's at A-C grades, did A Levels and went on to uni and graduated with a 2:1. I think as there are so many other factors surrounding encouraging children to do their best in their education i.e. parenting skills, the school itself etc that i personally wouldn't worry too much about when the child is born.

    If i fall pregnant within the next 2 cycles (if i don't get my BFP this month!!) then i'll have a june-aug baby but i personally wouldn't put off ttc until dec for that reason alone. Good luck hun whatever you decide. xx
  • Sorry to gatecrash but I thought this topic was too interesting to ignore! I've been lurking for ages (desperate to start ttc again) but used to be a regular until my wee boy arrived in June 08.

    The September thing confused me initially until you explained the school connection. I live in Scotland and here (for no apparent reason) the eldest children in a class are born in March. My preference was for a child born from March onwards for the same reasoning as you. But actually here all parents of children born in Jan and Feb are given the option to wait a year to start school so it's not such an issue in reality. I also have a friend who's eldest daughter was born in November and she managed to argue for her to start a year later too because she wasn't emotionally mature enough. My son won't be the oldest in his class once he's at school but he will be 5 by the time he starts which is good enough for me!

    I was 34 when we started trying and I'd been on Loestin 30 for about 2 years. I came off the pill and we started ttc immediately (no need to wait other than it helping with the dating of delivery date) and I got pregnant first month of trying. I would recommend waiting until you are likely to hit the September date you would prefer and if it takes a few months then your child still will be in the eldest half of the year. It can be valuable for some children to be older before starting school but it's a very individual thing that you can't control, much like when you will actually conceive... We were lucky this time. But next time we might have a December baby and you know what, that will be fine too.

    Good luck!
  • Hey there. It is really hard to know when you will get pregnant. I tried and tried. First I had an early mc in which the baby would have due Nov. Now I am pregnant with baby due in May ! I feel I didn't have a choice & I don't mind when my baby comes into this world just that it does. I am in the USA so it may be different where you are. But I had read that fall/winter babies are less educated. It really shocked me because I am one of them though I graduated in top 1% of my class. The reason being they have a chance to drop out earlier from school. Here you can drop out at age 16. So you see they can leave 3 years early, where a summer baby would only have 2 years left so decides to continue. You really can't try and have a baby at a certain time. I waited thought it would happen right away and from the time that I started trying to know that I am 8 weeks pregnant it took 2 years. So I wished I had started earlier. But also just read a post 1st month pregnant off the pill & only bd one time ! So you never know. It will happen when it's your time but you won't know until you try.
  • I hope no-one minds me resurecting this old topic but I stumbled across it and it's something that I find very interesting.

    I just wanted to point out that the argument is not that September to December babies are more intelligent and that June-August babies are less intelligent at all. The arguement is that the within an academic year, the older children will be more emotionally, mentally and physically developed than the children that are nearly a year younger and they will be at more of an advantage in the class room. They may find it quicker and easier to learn and this may make the younger children feel like they are less intelligent in comparison. The way children feel about their own ability can then affect their performance.

    I read a book called Outliers by a Sociologist called Malcomb Gladwell which looks at why some people are more successfull than others and he found that age in comparison to your peers does have a massive effect. It's an interesting read. I can't remember the actual facts but I think he found that a very high percentage of pro ice hockey players in the USA were born in Jan - March because the season begins in Jan. This meant that in the try-outs the biggest, strongest and fastest boys were more likely to be picked at the start of the season and then those chilldren would get lots of extra special training and attention while the smaller, younger children in the year would be neglected (in terms of ice-hockey). Over the years this gap would widen bcause of the extra training the Jan - March boys were given.

    Having said all that, I am currently trying for a baby and if we get lucky in the next 6 months we'll be having a baby born in the second half of the academic year. I'm sure you can counteract the age difference by continueing the learning at home.

    I think birth order matters too. My two step-sons were born in March and June. The March born boy is the eldest and found school to be a real shock to the system and a struggle at first - he wanted to stay at home with his baby brother. The June born boy had heard his older brother doing his reading homework for 2 years before he started school and he'd picked up a lot and was raring to go. He is doing really well in comparison to other children in his class.

    Sorry for waffling!



  • Interesting discussion. xx
  • We planned to have a September baby for our second and couldn't have been more naive.
    Yes in an ideal world we would want the best for our children but i'd rather have an August baby than no baby at all! Lol!

    I really hope it happens first month for you but after you've been trying for as long as some of us here you'll see that there are so many more important things.

    You could find that you don't fall pregnant in the first few months, then baby will be a December baby, would you stop ttc for that month so it wouldn't be born around Christmas?? I considered this but you really can't plan it, it's a natural thing and will happen when it's right. Apparently! Just enjoy baby making x
  • It took us 20 months to conceive so if your ready for a baby I would personally not start taking the pill again. I would happily have had a baby due in Aug if it had meant being pregnant. x
  • Would totally agree with Amy and Ruby. When we started ttc in December I was hopeful for an autumn baby and now we're on month 9 with no sign of a bfp. You just can't plan these things and I personally believe that if you want a baby in any particular month then you don't actually want one enough! I wouldn't particularly want a xmas baby but I'd have one on xmas day if that was what was given to me. Right now I just want to be pregnant again x
  • G/C i agree we tried for three years before we fell pregnant and my dd1 was born 16th oct 07 and as it took so long with her we decided to try as soon as i felt ready and fell the first month dd2 was born march 09 they are both very bright little girls not school age yet i know but im not bothered when they were born as long as they were healthy and feel so lucky to have two lovely little girls, and when i am ready to ttc again i just hope i get pregnant quickly doesnt matter when they are born.
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