Really TMI question!!

Sorry this is gonna be a bit unpleasant, but have any of you had problems having sex whilst TTC?

We used to have sex once to twice a week and it was really good. But now we're trying to do it everyday it just isn't working that well.

We're both getting frustrated/ upset and wondering if there's something wrong... I'm just not getting wet down there anymore, and he's not getting hard enough. It works in the end with a lot of patience and 'stuffing it in' (sooo sorry!) but it's just not enjoyable, and we're both left feeling like there's either something medically wrong or we don't fancy each other anymore! image


  • Hi there. I think lots of people have this problem. My doctor said every other day from day six to day 18 is good. I think we all go through the stages and we all want to keep the love and excitement in our sex lives. You will probably find you are wetter around ov and then things dry up a little. Have you considered getting some pre seed or zestica? They are lubricants that are sperm friendly and won't damage them.

    Really my advice would be donut when you feel like it for a month and take the pressure off. I think a good way one of the lovely ladies said. Doing it the cavman way. He he (don't mean hitting you over the head and dragging you into the bedroom by the hair he he)

    Hope this helps x

    [Modified by: Ladybird73 on July 29, 2010 11:12 AM]

  • omg! yes! lol @ stuffing it in! hehe. since we have been ttc, yes we have bd'd but not as much as we used to, and hubs hasnt been as hard either, i have had a few chats with him about it, co i was worried (same as u) is he not attracted to me anymore, does he just not want me to get pg etc etc. im not usualy very wet anyways. after a few chats with hubs tho, he has said hes just under a bit of pressure, he feels he has to perfrom and is a bit stressed about it, he wants to have a babe and is still attracted to me, after much reassurance from him lol. he just feels pressured as we both want it so much. hope that makes sense? try not to worry too much, and i no its hard but u both need to relax, maybe arrange a date night or something where u can spend time togther and forget about ttc giev each other a nice relaxing massage? then bd lol.
  • Ah hun, I really wouldn't worry. Maybe you both feel subconsciously that your doing it to make a baby rather than making love like you used too.

    Also I think a lot of people need a little help in the form of a lubricant if you're at it every day!

    I don't think its unusual... maybe have a break, 3 or 4 times a week might work better. Good luck xx

  • Hmm maybe I will try some lubricant. Some are damaging to sperm though aren't they? So what has everyone done to spice up BD?!! x
  • nice undies and massages lol. thinking of maybe didfferent places in the house (me and hubs chatted about it last night lol) im usually a in bed at night only person, but he said hes sure bd on the sofa, or u no around the house? in the morning, or lunch time or something would spice things up, he even got excited talking about it lol so im sure that will work for us! and if u use preseed or zestica, they dont kill the spermies image x
  • Yeah, you're right. Pressed and Zestica I know people use, and I'm sure I read on here there is a sperm friendly one made by durex too.

    Due to work and early starts we usually get down to it when we go to bed so different times of day are something different. And I never mention to hubby ovulation or fertility or any thing along those lines... that's not going to get him in the mood! X
  • yeah vass, i think im gonna stop talking about fetility/bfps/ov to hubs too. think its stressing him even more bless him! x
  • Hmm maybe I'll stop talking about those things to hubs. But he likes to be involved! Maybe I will put some sexy undies on tonight. If only we could have a glass of wine to relax!!
  • i no, my hubs said he wants to know when i get a + opk too. good plan with the undies image hubs said he wants to no about it etc etc, but ive decied to keep it to myself and if he asks about opk, just tell him its a secret as i dont want him stressing over stuff he cant conrtol, so just try and relax this month (to him i mean lol we all no its impossible for us b.e girls to relax!)
  • i found the best thing is to aim for every other day as it gets too much esp if ov falls midweek and you working your little asses off!

    also keeping all the techy stuff to myself and not acctually telling him when its time so theres no pressure,

    the two lubes mentioned are swimmer friendly

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