Ever felt/worried you are being judged whilst Weaning/Feeding in public?
Hi Mums, I was just wondering if you have been judged/or worried about being judged by other mothers/people whilst feeding your LOs when you have been out and about? I just got thinking about it after I was out with my LOs today on a train. I had some organic sweetcorn maize ring snacks (specifically for babies/toddlers, with nothing added), tucked in my bag that I was giving them, when suddenly I heard a woman pipe up to her friend,how disgusting it is that people feed their children junk food like crisps (obviously so I would hear)! Quick as a flash I turned around producing the packaging of the snacks and gave her an equally public dressing down, and how dare she! Her face was a picture, but i felt infuriated, embarassed and a little upset. Has anyone experienced anything similar?
Replies
Ive never had anyone say anything but ive had a few looks when ive being letting marley snack on baby/toddler crisps like the ones you mentioned. I try and make a point of holding the packet up so people can see what they are! I do think people judge you for what you feed your baby its not like im going to let him have a pack of walkers!
I know exactly what you mean! However, I perhaps have had similar thoughts in the past................ but I would never say anything to anyone! And now I am the mum feeding the baby food that looks like junk! My opinions have change dramatically he he he he he!
What I found more worrying was that my HV once suggested I gave my DD Quavers or the like................ don't think I'll go down that route yet!
I have heard a couple of stories recently about milk feeding - a friend of a friend had had a really rough time breast feeding, so was using a bottle to feed her LO and a woman approached her and said it was disgraceful that she wasn't breastfeeding!
Then as recently as last week a friend was breast feeding her LO on the bus, partly to keep her quiet so as not to disturb other passengers, and a woman turned around her told her she was primitive and it was disgusting to do that in public.............. Thankfully other passengers backed up my friend!
It really frustrates me all the negative comments and judgements people feel that have a right to voice.
jodie-lou : Exactly! I now do the same!! we shouldn't have to though!
krh : That is terrible! Your poor friends! I am so glad that members of the public helped back your friend up, some people really have no idea do they? that is what breast are for!! it really infuriates me!
A lot of these people don't have there own children and are too quick to voice their thoughts and opinions without thinking of the effects on others or having the full story.Either that or they are those Alpha mothers who think that everything they do is right and everyone else who does otherwise is wrong,, and enjoy looking down there nose! I once had some woman scold me because, of all things, the fruit i was feeding my LO was not organic,and started going on a rant! I politely told her that although i buy organic food when I can, I cannot afford it all of the time!
It can be quite hurtful for someone to make flippant comments on how you feed your child or bring them up, especially for first time mums, as there is an awful lot of pressure, and you always want to do your best. to be told otherwise is horrible.
I myself have seen some pretty awful examples of bad feeding, such as a two year old in pram drinking a bottle of full fat pepsi and a child of no more than 15 months being fed a macdonalds cheese burger and salted fries, that makes me feel really sad, as the mothers either don't care about there childs health or are not educated enough in the subject, to know the damage they are doing. Still I would never confront anyone as I don't think it is for me to say (although in those cases you really want too, as it is common sense!!), but also you do not know how such a confrontation can play out,
I think that when you become a Mum (parent), suddenly the whole world has an opinion of how/what/when you do things. Not just feeding but every aspect of parenting will offend, annoy or be frowned upon by someone. You have to develop a thick skin but do what you believe to be best for your LO.
At times we give or LO's foods we shouldn't. just like every now and then you might have an extra chocolate/biscuit but it doesn't mean that you eat them all the time.
On our recent holiday, Annabel's dad gave her a chip from the (award winning) fish and chip shop. I was really annoyed and embarrassed as we were in public, I was worried that people would think we fed her that kind of food all the time, but actually she had two chips and dropped half of one.