Forum home Pregnancy Pregnancy

so confused - need serious advice and opinions pls

Ok will make as brief as poss! I'm 34+4 and today saw my consultant regarding a c section. This is my first baby and due to a number of reasons (not medical) he has agreed I can have one. I have 2 weeks to decide if its really what I want before I go back to see him when he will book it. I am just so confused. I don't know what to do. I have never done this before and everything is so new and scary. I feel very lucky to have a choice so to speak but also very guilty I may be messing with a perfectly normal natural birth. Ok I really am rambling now, I just would really value ur opinions on natural birth vs elective c section cause my brain can't take it anymore. I just want to add even tho the reasons are not medical they are valid reasons and not that I am too posh to push!


  • Hi Sarah, I guess it totally depends on what your reasons are for wanting a C section in the 1st place? For me personally I would like to try to give birth naturally unless for medical reasons I can't. I would like the experience for 1 thing but also the fact that I'd hopefully recover quicker and be able to move around easier if I gave birth naturally. I'd 100% have a section if the Dr's advised me to though, I wouldn't think twice about that xx
  • i'd say it definately depends on your reasons...

    For me, I would only want a csection if there was any risk to me or bubs in having a natural birth

    Co xx
  • It depends what you're reasons are I guess...

    it takes longer to recover from a section and you can't drive etc...for 6 weeks or so. Will that have any impact on you? Do you have people to help at home while you recover?

    I had my son naturally and it was a wonderful experience, I was home within 6 hours and out and about shopping and visiting the next day as felt wonderful, if not a tiny bit sore but thats to be expected...

    Obviously if for medical reasons I had to have a section then the health of bubs and myself would be the most important thing so would do what was needed. You have to do what is best for you.

    [Modified by: Sazzle33 on August 31, 2010 05:19 PM]

  • I agree with the other girls - it depends on your reasons.

    Personally medical reasons would be the only ones I would have to make me want a section as it's obviously major surgery and to be avoided at all costs as far as I'm concerned, mainly for the length of time it would take to recover.

    I've had two babies and can only go with my own experience as I'm not a medical professional but with the first I was induced and needed assistance. As a result baby was ill after birth, I took a long time to recover, bf was bl**dy difficult and I had problems bonding with baby. My second was born on Sunday, with very little medical intervention, and although I have stitches and am a bit sore, I got home the same day, bf is going well, I've already bonded with baby and I feel remarkably fit for someone who just gave birth. If I'd had a section (nearly had to have a planned section as baby was breech for a while, luckily he turned) it would be a very different story - I would no doubt still be in hosptial, I don't know how easily I'd be able to pick up my baby and change/feed/cuddle him, although I have friends who have had planned sections due to having previous em sections and they had lovely experiences so I guess it can all vary so wildly.

    Sorry that's a bit waffly, I'm sleep deprived. I guess you just need to weigh up the pros and cons and go with what is ultimately going to be best for you and baby.
  • If it is for mental health / psychological reasons then that is classed as medical reasons too.

    I don't know the details and can't tell you what to do hun, but I can say that even if you agree and it's booked, you are entitled to change your mind right up until the last minute! So don't feel pressured by the consultant.

    Do you feel able to share with us your reasons? It might help us to empathise and give you a bit more direction? Although I totally understand if it's too sensitive / personal to say.

    Either way, good luck!! xxxx :\)
  • this is a difficult one, there are the physical restrictions post op to consider, but also, I think you need to think about how you would feel if you decided to labour and birth naturally and then ended up with an emcs anyway?
    None of us know your situation to be able to advise what would be best for you, but I think you need to look at it from every single angle before making a firm decision. xx
  • Without knowing your reasons it is difficult to give an opinion but on a personal level I would only have a c-section if there was no other option. Recovery period is longer, you will have to stay in, you won't get to bond with the baby straight away. I think only you can make that decision though xx I am sure it will be fine what ever you decide xx
  • Well if you are having an elective c-section then you are able to control (as much as anyone can control birth) how it goes. You will be awake (I assume), with your oh there too. You could ask the surgeon to talk you through what he is doing (if this doesn't freak you out ofcourse!). Infact I've heard that sometimes they will drop the curtain at the appropriate moment so that you can see baby being delivered (not sure I'd be up for that mind). If you don't know the sex you could ask that your oh is the one to tell you whether its a girl or boy. As long as baby is healthy there is no reason why you can't have skin to skin contact asap - it would just mean remembering to keep your gown loose. Again, you could request that as long as baby is healthy that you are allowed to hold him/her while you are stitched up, or your oh could hold him/her.

    If you plan on breastfeeding then now is the time to get to grips with the different positions that are good for bf'ing with a c-section scar - also ask what extra support you will get while you are in the hospital, not just for feeding but also for looking after baby generally and for getting about (going to the loo and such). Make plans for who will visit you and when, so that a) you have chance to recover before the hordes descend and b) you have something to look forward to. Get your oh to bring you in nice food each day to keep your spirits up.

    Also, check out all the stuff on the market designed for helping with the scar - in Boots I have seen these sort of ice pack things that strap to the scar, plus special plaster things that help with healing and minimising the appearance of the scar. Yes, it is major surgery but on the plus side if you have an elective section then you are able to plan ahead and think of what will make things easier for you - who can help you, how they can help you, that sort of thing. Also how you can help yourself with your recovery.

    As a first timer, at this point both vaginal birth and c-section scare the living day lights out of me. Both methods of birthing have their pros and cons. If you have a vaginal birth you could end up in considerable pain, perhaps with long lasting lady area implications. Not that I want to worry you, I've just been thinking through everything ALOT lately! A c-section, as serious as it is, reminds you that you have given birth and could help you not to push yourself too hard too soon - you know, no trips to the supermarket 2 days after giving birth, stuff like that.

    I think that whichever choice you make, if you arm yourself with as much knowledge as possible, and think forward to how you will recover after the birth, then that choice will become less daunting for you because you will be more prepared for it and have some control over it.

    I have no idea whether my ramblings help, I just tried to think of things that would make it easier for me if I were in your position.

Sign In or Register to comment.

Featured Discussions