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Am I Wrong??
i'm 9 1/2 weeks pregnant with baby no 2 and am not telling everyone i know til i've had my 1st scan, my problem is this:
when i had my first baby a friend of mine had a boy about 5 months before i had Noah. she insists that she will not have any more children as her pregnancy was very difficult. before Noah was born she gave me a load of baby clothes that her little boy had grown out of, and as her boy has grown out of his clothes she has passed them on to me, saying that if she hadn't given them to me she would only have thrown them away.
i then had a text from her last night asking if i'd finished with them as her friend has just found out she is pregnant and could her friend have the clothes. as far as i was concerned she'd given the clothes to me and i have packed them away for baby no 2,i don't know what i'm having yet obviously but it's more than likely to be another boy, as there are lots of boys on my husbands side of the family. the other girl obviously doesnt know what she is having either and has only just found out so i would assume she's probably only 5-6 weeks. i don't want to trell her i'm pregnant til i've had my scan.what do i tell her? am i wrong to want to keep these clothes as i thought they were mine to keep? sorry i know it's trivial but i don't know what to tell her as i feel that she shouldn't really be asking for them back for someone else, if they were for her then it would be a different matter.
Em xx :?
when i had my first baby a friend of mine had a boy about 5 months before i had Noah. she insists that she will not have any more children as her pregnancy was very difficult. before Noah was born she gave me a load of baby clothes that her little boy had grown out of, and as her boy has grown out of his clothes she has passed them on to me, saying that if she hadn't given them to me she would only have thrown them away.
i then had a text from her last night asking if i'd finished with them as her friend has just found out she is pregnant and could her friend have the clothes. as far as i was concerned she'd given the clothes to me and i have packed them away for baby no 2,i don't know what i'm having yet obviously but it's more than likely to be another boy, as there are lots of boys on my husbands side of the family. the other girl obviously doesnt know what she is having either and has only just found out so i would assume she's probably only 5-6 weeks. i don't want to trell her i'm pregnant til i've had my scan.what do i tell her? am i wrong to want to keep these clothes as i thought they were mine to keep? sorry i know it's trivial but i don't know what to tell her as i feel that she shouldn't really be asking for them back for someone else, if they were for her then it would be a different matter.
Em xx :?
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Replies
Plan B is to stall her until you've had the scan, but presumably she's already offered the stuff to her other friend so it'd put her in a position. She'll only have offered the stuff honestly assuming you no longer have need of it... she doesn't know what you know
Nice that you have friends who share! xx
I can't really see any way round it but to tell her hun, it's a bit of a difficult situation! Sorry I'm not much help.xxx
You can pick more up so reasonably now I think, personally, the friendship comes first hon! She has no idea that you may need them - is it really fair putting her in that position? Maybe when you tell her she will say - best you keep them but you are not giving her the option!
Love Lee
xxxxx
20wks 3 days
Though im sure her friend would be grateful for the clothes, you need them as well. Why not split the clothes. you give half and then keep the other half. You probably will have to tell your friend that you are pg again, but she will be over the moon for you. Congrats by the way! x
Obviously I don't know your friend or her reasons for asking for the clothes but in my experience there is usually a good network of people all trying to help each other out by passing things on for babies and so she's probably just trying to help. She doesn't know you're pregnant so she just trying to help a friend. It doesn't sound like she thinks the clothes are still her property but maybe she knows you have them and would rather they go to someone else she knows than you throwing them out or passing them to a charity shop.
My sister-in-law offered their son's cotbed to another friend before I had a chance to ask for it but she's said she could get her hands on another cotbed or a cot from other people she knows so we could have a choice! It's like a little industry of people helping each other out. I'm sure that's what your friend is doing.
Hope you sort it out - it's an interesting dilema actually and one I will now bear in mind with all the hand-me-downs I'm going to be receiving!
Didn't want to tell anyone but have fessed up to cousin who is now going to store stuff at hers!!!
The others are right though and depending on your dates you may even both get to use the clothes in question- my cousin and I have traded maternity stuff 4 times too!