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my mc story

Hi, i just wanted to tell my story to the people who understand what I'm going through. Me and my husband had only just started ttc in feb. i only came off the pill beginning dec and had 1 af since in jan. when i thought my feb af was due it never came so i did a test and was bfn. we then went on hol end of feb and i kept doing tests (foreign ones) but still bfn and still no af. i didnt drink alcohol and was careful about what i ate just incase as i thought maybe i just didnt understand the foreign tests (they r diff to ones in uk), but anyway to cut a long story short when we got back from hol i went to docs who did a test and it was positive!! because my lmp was in jan they estimated that i was about 7-8 weeks so at about 10-11 weelks i went for a scan only to be told that i was only about 6 wks and it wasnt progressing well, i was told to expect to miscarry. one nurse was going to book an app for the next day to rescan to confirm it and probably book me in for a dc. i said i wanted to leave it a wk just incase it did develop, so we went in a wk later and there had been some slight progression but they stil said expect to miscarry. i was very confused as my pregnancy symptoms had been getting stronger and stronger. after finding a website about misdiagnosed mc's i felt positive that things were ok, so we decided to change hospitals, the doc there said my hcg levels were good and that id just been scanned early, so after that we were even more positive and decided to wait a few weeks to have another scan to give the baby chance to grow. the app was for yesterday but i started to lightly spot and had slight cramps since monday so i was worried but still had slight hope because ive been told many people do bleed. however the scan showed that the baby had stopped growing at 7 weeks. i really thought that things would be ok esp as i was getting syptoms!! i was told i can have a dc but as the bleeding has got heavier today i think im just going to let it happen naturally as i think that should be best for my body. esp as the nurse said the dc is a blind operation and theres a slight chance they could damage inside. what does evryone else think? how long can it take naturally? i just want it all to be over now and my cycle to re-start so we can start ttc again. been told that its best to wait for 2 af so u know what your cycles like. ive read different things and some people say its best to wait at least 3 months (3af's) to give your body a chance to recover but then some said they ttc straightaway. id just be so scared for the first 12 weeks next time that itd happen again. ive even subscribed to the baby mag and dont know weather i should cancel that now? thanks for reading! sorry its so long! x

[Modified by: twist_twirl on 01 May 2008 17:23:03 ]


  • hia
    sorry to hear about your loss.
    i had a mmc naturally. started spotting on the monday and mc was diagnosed weds. then in the middle of the night on thurs i was having labour pains and was admitted to hospital. I lost the baby at 7am on the friday morning. The baby was born in the pregnancy sack and in total it was about 7cm long.
    i had chosen to mc naturaly as i didn't want to feel guilty for getting rid of my baby
    whatever you choose to take care and take plenty of time to grieve.
  • Hello twist-twirl. I am really sorry about what you have been through. I had my 12 week scan on tuesday and was told the baby had died at 81/2 weeks. i had had pains since saturday but had started to have really intense pains on wednesday at about 4 pm - this went on and off like contractions until 3pm yesterday when i finally had a miscarriage. i think the amount of time it takes to have an mc varies. (i was booked into to have a d&c today but am just going in for scan to make sure all is gone- if you feel the mc is coming, maybe it is wort letting it happen naturally) be strong, you might find having a bath or uising a hot water bottle helps with the pains, you may also need pain killers. I would cancel the mag i f i were you- you can re-subscribe in a couple of months when you are pregnant again!! (although my boyfriend and i hadn't quite planned teh pregnancy, all i want to do is get pregnant again as soon as possible) I wish you all the best XX
  • Hi twist-twirl

    My mc was 6 weeks ago now. got first af after 5 weeks. i have finally managed to go a whole week at work without crying about it so finally starting to feel more positive about things. i should have been 12 weeks last weekend and i was very down then but getting af has really helped (and may have been so sad cos of PMT too) probably won't start ttc until after next af by which time i'll be almost 3 months since mc. at least now i know i could try if i wanted to and that's made things easier. my gp said to wait at least 3 months to make sure emotionally ready but that's too long for me. i was stressed enough b4 things went bad so i can't possibly be worse next time!

    Big hugs
  • Hello twist-twirl
    So sorry to hear your bad news. I've just been through something very similar - had spotting at seven weeks and an early scan showed poor growth. A week later, it seemed to be making better progress but last weekend I began passing red blood and a third scan this Thursday showed there was no longer a heartbeat. The foetus was still there, fully intact, just silent and lifeless in the sac.
    On the advice of my doctor I went for a D&C, partly because I was very scared of the physical aspect of going through with a miscarriage and partly because he said that it's not uncommon for women to need a D&C anyway afterwards. He also mentioned that, although it was likely to happen imminently, it could take up to a month for nature to take its course.
    I felt that leaving the baby inside me for what could be weeks would only add to the anguish so I had the operation yesterday.
    Of course it's for everyone to decide what they want to do but I can honestly say it was for me personally, in the midst of a terribly upsetting situation, a very positive experience. The nurses were incredibly compassionate, the operation itself was so quick, and I woke up feeling very little pain. Within 30 minutes the tiny cramping had gone, and last night I was already passing far less blood than I had been before.
    I'd had two horrible weeks of feeling totally out of control and out of sorts, but within a few hours of the operation I felt back to normal physically, albeit it not mentally. That's going to take time.
    Luc, I read your comment about not wanting to feel guilty about getting rid of the baby, and I totally respect that, but my own feeling was that having a d&c was not going to make any difference to the outcome - my baby was gone and my body would need to expel it one way or another. I guess some people want to wait because it feels more final, like there's more closure. And maybe I'm a coward but I just couldn't bear the physical pain adding to the emotional pain.
    I'm so glad I went for the op and I didn't have to face up to going through a full miscarriage, but I think you just have to do what feels right for you.
    All the best
  • hya am sorry 2 hear about ur loss i had a missed m/c in dec wif twins i let nature take its course i waited abut 2 weeks and my little babies came out . i have just foun dout i have lost another baby which i dnt quiet understad as i had no bleeding or pains i havnt started bleedin yet so i have bein advised 2 have th baby removed i would rther wait 4 it naturaly but it is killin me knowin my lil baby is ded inside me i want thingsova and dun wif so me and ov can concentrate on tryn agen .. wish u all h lukc in th future x
  • So sorry to hear of your mc I had the same experience as you as in went and they said it was too early to see the heartbeat then eventually went back at 10 weeks for a scan only to be told they baby had died at 6 weeks, I was devastated and they explained I could wait for it to happen natuarally or have a d and c and as my baby had been inside me for 3 1/2 weeks dead and I had no signs of a miscariage i decided to go for the d and c which was very straight forward unfortunatly 4 weeks later I had a massive haemorrhage and had to be re admitted into hospital as I had retained products and still had to ahave a further d and c and was told if you are in early pregnancy its harder to ensure they get all that is in the uterus so my advice is if you have any signs of miscarrying natually I should just see how things go, like you I just wanted to get it all over with so we could try again but it just was not the right choice for me but good luck and you do what you feel is right for you x
  • Hi everyone thanks for all of your replys! Sorry to her about your own experiences, hopefully we'll have better luck next time! This is more or less the first time I've come back on this site since i mc. With my last msg I had pretty much just started to bleed with it getting heavier (mon - wed) by friday aftrenoon I started to get worse cramping pains and I took a pain killer. By about 8pm the pain was extremely bad so I had a bath, which seemed to ease it but was still terrible but I seemed to manage. Untill I got out! I was in extreme pain all night and bleeding very heavlily until about 2am when I think the mc actually happened. (My husband phoned the hospital and they said for me to go in but I didn't know if they could give me anything to properly ease the pain and as my hair was wet and I was ready for bed and I would'nt have been able to get dressed and dry my hair as the pain was so bad, I decided not to go in). I managed to get some sleep with the help of hot water bottles and as the pain had eased. In the morning I felt much better. I continued to bleed less heavily for the the next week and on the following Friday evening the pain came back really bad again. I felt like i needed the loo but I couldn't go. Anyway not to want to be giving too much info when i last went to try and go to the loo there was a massive gush and that was the last of it. After that the pain went. The next few days the beeding slowed down and eventually stopped. The hospital did a pg test and that said ng. I was unsure before of when we should ttc again, but we've decided not to use any protection. We both feel ok mentally and I feel ok physically and the hosp said the only resaon really is for dating purposes I thought why not! I don't believe my cycle to be regular anyway as i was prev on the pill and got pg pretty much once we started trying. So hopefully it won't be too long before I am again. I'll prob do a test in about 4-6 wks time if my af doesn't start. In the end even though the pain was really bad I'm glad I didn't have the dc and just let my body take care of itself. Hopefully next time things will be ok!
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