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IGNORE SORRY ABOUT THIS
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Sorry someone i know has joined be and i need to erase my information, as she is so concerned with reading them!
[Modified by: removed on 15 September 2009 11:01:53 ]
Sorry someone i know has joined be and i need to erase my information, as she is so concerned with reading them!
[Modified by: removed on 15 September 2009 11:01:53 ]
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Replies
Hope this helps x x x x x
Ps. sorry if i sound bossy but you did ask what i would do in your situation! x
i agree with sarah...leopards can't change their spots!!!
you say yoyu know everything about each other..but you clearly didn't if his ex had to show you his true colours.
i think deep down you know your decision...from the way you was describing how nice your new fella is!!! yeah its early days...but you can't give up the chance of happiness because of worrying history might repeat itself...nothings guaranteed but its worth a shot if he makes you happy now.
i really think if you was to go back...things might be different and rosey for a few weeks or so...but it will change again, and i think you'll be constanty worrying and thinking about what he could be doing or saying behind your back.
from what you've said...you know you'll be happier staying in ireland...its just hard letting go of your old life.
maybe you could try talking to your new fella about what happened with your ex, and he could reassure and support you in letting go.
good luck hunny.
xxx
if you was to stay together and things did not change...that would be awful for your child to listen to the arguements and be caught up in it all. so it might start off as the best for your son, but it probably wouldn't be in the long run.
you need to remember that your child will grow up and 'fly the nest'...what happens for you then if you stay in a relationship for that child?
if you really believe 100% that he has changed and things will be different permanantly...then go back...if not, saty where you have made this new happy life for yourself.
don't keep beating yourself up over the decision...you've got to go for whats best for your baby...but also your own happiness as well.
sorry...i don't wanna be telling you what to do coz only you can make that decision, i'm just saying what i would do.
if you have any doubts on your ex, which it sounds like you do...you shouldn't go back.
yeah you may have doubts on your new relationship...but thats in the future and unforeseeable, where as you know what your getting with your ex...and like sarah said...you deserve more.
xxx
[Modified by: removed on September 15, 2009 11:04 AM]
well...you really need to think hard about it.
maybe write down pros and cons of each fella and going or staying.
in your 1st message you sounded set on your new fella...but now i'm not so sure.
just make sure if you go back, you are stronger and make sure things change...permanantly, or you could be unhappy forever and you don't want to end up regretting your decision.
you would never be held responsible if he doesn't see lo often....he will know where you are. yeah its a long way, but i'm sure your lo will understand as he would have a life there.
you will probably always love him...he's your babies father and you have alot of history, but you need to look at what you want out of the future.
think about how you felt when you flew back to ireland, do you want to risk feeling like it again?
if your new fella is good with lo and to you, do you want to risk ending it to take the chance with your ex?
where have you felt happier...london or ireland?
will you be able to forget what your ex has done in the past or will it always be in your mind?
you need to think about and answer it all hunny before you can decide..but if i were you...i think i'd stay put...a happy mummy makes a happy lo.
good luck...let us know.
xxx
Can you see yourself staying with him for the rest of your life and being happy? Youll always be worried about the next foot he will put wrong.
In the end of the day no one can make your decision but if it was me, no matter how much i loved him he would have no chance!
Good luck!!
[Modified by: removed on September 15, 2009 11:07 AM]
He betrayed you with his ex. I dont think this man will change and I think you're too good for him.
You're half way there. Keep going. This new guy is a good distraction, he may not be the man for you, but take each day as it comes.
You're an inspiration to pregnant lonely women out there who have been hurt and betrayed (me!!).
Keep us updated!
i had a complete breakdown in front of my step-mother yesterday and it made me realise that i really need to sort out my problems i cant keep putting them aside and hoping for the best.
I want to go back to england. my heart wants to go back to england, with or without the help of lo dad. i'll make it on my own, i made it when i was 16 on my own, ill make it work again now im a single mother. But of course i will give jason every chance to be in ciarans life, and mine.
but if he fucks up (sory about wording) then he has lost and ill continue by myself.
ive decided i am being too much of a bitch to the new guy i was talking about.he deserves a girl who will love him and only him, because he is so sweet.but sweet isnt what i want and i cant sting him along. even if i dont go back to jason, i know riht now i cant give him my heart im constantly thinking about some-one else, so im goin to finish things between us.i really like him but as the lady on here said im not ready.
i hate making decisions but ive typed this in, and so im going to do it.
i just have to figure out how, i intend to break up with this sweet guy. i really dont want to hurt him, he don deserve that.
wish me luck xxx:\?
Im not with my little boys dad,we spilt before Benji was born,had a brief try again once he was born,but i knew then deep down it wouldnt last and it didnt!it was hard going at first but now im so happy,i couldnt imagine being with my los dad anymore,actually think ive had a bloody lucky escape lol!
The real reason im replying is because i got reinvolved with a guy i used to date for awhile several years ago,hes from London and i live in the North West,so could only see each other every other weekend,which was fine as i wasnt really ready for a full on relationship,he was and is the sweetest guy anyone would meet...so kind,honest and caring,the worse thing is i knew he was in love with me!I liked him and he helped me in many ways get over my ex...showed me what kind of relationship i wanted,what a decent guy could be like!BUT i just didnt have those sort of feelings for him!in some ways i found him boring(i know!feel bad)but like you say..you just know when things are right and if they arent you cant string someone along,especially when that someone IS so nice!!!!
Well i made the decision to end things,was tough as i hated hurting him and to make it worse he was just sooo understanding!anyway to cut a long story short we are still friends though of course dont have as much contact anymore,and ive now meet someone else who is all those things the London guy was but more the sort of person i want!
Im just saying i know what its like,but at the end of it all you have to do whats right for YOU!take care...x