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Can't believe I'm typing this
I've lost our bean, again. I bled very heavily last night and passed a very big clot,. i was at my parents at the time and my mum looked after me and tidied me up and sorted everything out (she's a retired nurse and I thank god she was there). She gently told me that from what she could see, it looked like I had passed the sac. I have a scan on Friday, but in my heart of hearts I know it has gone.
I am totally heartbroken, I dunno how many more times I can go through this. I know I want to try again, but being back in this horrible place is just soul destroying. I just wanted to thank everyone for all their lovely words of support through these few short weeks, especially Magic Bean, MrsKittyboo and Woomummy. I have come so used to logging on and checking everyone is ok, that I can't imagine I will stop, but I might just lurk for a bit until I feel strong enough.
Take care and lots of love to everyone. xxx
I am totally heartbroken, I dunno how many more times I can go through this. I know I want to try again, but being back in this horrible place is just soul destroying. I just wanted to thank everyone for all their lovely words of support through these few short weeks, especially Magic Bean, MrsKittyboo and Woomummy. I have come so used to logging on and checking everyone is ok, that I can't imagine I will stop, but I might just lurk for a bit until I feel strong enough.
Take care and lots of love to everyone. xxx
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Replies
We have never spoke but just read your post so wanted to leave you a message, i know no one can say anything to make you feel better and im assuming this is not your first m/c. Maybe you could push the doctors to run some tests and see if there is something causing you to m/c. I had an early miscarriage a couple years ago now and we had been trying for a while for a baby, i know how devastating it can be, but for me it did get easier with time and when that little baby would have been due i actually found out i was carrying again and now have my son. So keep your chin up, i know its easier said than done but it will happen for you, maybe you could even request early scans aswell in future to help you relax.
Im so sorry for your lose and im glad you have a wonderfull family to help you through this hard time.
charlie x
My thoughts are with you.
C.xx
Yes you're right this is my fourth mc. After the third, which was only Sept last year, we were sent for tests. We have had the results back from all but one and everything has been clear. We are just waiting to hear about the chromosome tests and should find out in Feb. They have already warned us though that even if they do find a problem and that my and hubby and I have incompatible genes, there is no cure, but it just lets us know that our chances of having a successful pregnancy are lower.
We had early scans this time which have been very reassuring and it's only last Thursday that we saw a heartbeat, so it does seem very cruel that things have gone wrong again. I know I am getting excellent care, I just wish someone would find a magic solution for keeping my beans safe.
xx
Helen, god flower, I am totally stunned by the horrendous time you have had, I cannot imagine the pain of the losses you have suffered, my heart goes out to you. I'm so so sorry that you find yourself back in this position again and am here if you ever need to talk, am sending huge hugs and lots of love to get you through this awful time xxxxxxx
charlie x
I had an early mc a few weeks ago but can't compare with how you must be feeling.
Try and stay strong.
x x
I am so sad for you I knew you in the August forum before I lost my little bean.
I do hope you get really positive results back in February and go on to have a healthy little bean.
I am thinking of you and sending you all the love I can xxxxx
Helen sorry you've had to go through this too. Hope you can gain some sort of strength.
I'll be thinking of you both.
((((hugs))))
Shell x
Lilou x
Huge hugs hun. I know nothing I say can really make you feel better at the moment. It's so awful that people have to go through these things.
You WILL hold your baby one day. When I feel really down I always think - will I feel this bad in 1 year, 2 years etc and the answer is always no as time heals, situations change which makes me feel better.
Someone said to me after my mc that one day you will hold your baby in your arms and you will think that if you hadn't had mc'd other beans, this baby wouldn't be there. So although it sucks, at some point it will make sense. They said it more eloquently than this but I hope it make sense. My nan had a stillborn son and always said things happen for a reason and if she hadn't lost that baby my Mum would never have been born, me and my sis wouldn't be here etc.
Things don't make sense at the moment - but be strong and it will be worth it.
xxx
Will be thinking of you on friday,
Take care of yourself,
Caroline xxx