My mum is going to drive me NUTS !
Firstly sorry for the long post.
i have an issue, which im sure due to being pregnant is seeming so much harder to deal with.
So i am hoping i can gain from your advice/experience and expertise.
My mum and i didnt talk for about a year due to some issues which are irrelevant really, but know we are back in touch and meet up etc.
I am 22 wks pregnant and she is over the moon, knitting away. Which im so happy about.
The problem is is she is set in her ways of how to do things etc and keeps telling me what i should and shouldnt do. Silly things that i should not really worry about are really stressing me out.
She is knitting stuff that i would really put my child in . Ive told her NOT to knit big things yet shes knitted for a 12 month old - a romper suit with ears. Saying "well i think its cute". This is not the biggest thing though.
She wants to come and stay for 6 weeks after i give birth. Instead of saying "oh i want to come and look after you and help you" etc. she told me "well you wont know what to do with the baby - how to bath it, change its nappy and you'll need some-one there to tell you". I did tell her actually it would be nice if you could help with the house/cooking and she ignored me and said "well i found it hard when i had you so you need someone there to tell you waht to do" AAARTRRRGGGGHHHHH.
I know this is my first baby, but i am not STUPID. i am 35 and she treats me like a incapable child!
Shes told me i prob wont be able to breast feed beyond a month cus thats all she could do with me and your body doesnt produce enough for the first baby. Again AAARRRGGGHHH. I thought everyone and every pregnancy was different - am i STUPID.
Then she showed me a qiult for the cot, to which i told her no point yet as i wont be using it until the baby is about 1 dye to recommendations. So she asked me "Are you going to make the baby freeze to death then. Again AAARRRGGGHHHH, weve alreadty had the conversation about the cellular blankets and she said I KNOW!
I showed her a book (Staurt Cambell - where he goes thru wk by wk with 3d scan pic) and she did a quick scan and said " oh we had these when you were born"...AAAAAAARRRGGGGGHHHHH, no you didnt . This is new technology, NOT 36 YEARS OLD !!!!!
If she stays ahe will constantly critise me. You dont know this - that-the other.
Thing is when i was 16 i looked after my little bro alot, changed his nappies, bottle fed him - thats all forgotten now!
I cant say no to her completely, so me and OH have agreed to say she can come for 2 wks, my othert half will be there too at the time and he said he will manage her.
But she will try and take over - i bet you i will hear from her that the baby likes her more than me.
Dont get me worng ladies, her issues are not that she is evil, shes had it hard and had a lot of citicism so she does it to build her own self up (at my expense). She never says anything positive to me.
I know i will have to have some words with her and i am prepared for some, but do any of you have any advice on how to deal with someone like that. her heart is in the right place, she just is like an old woman that doesnt let up !
As i say i cant not let her stay - i actually want her to be part of it - just not at my sanities expense.
Please help if you can ! xx