Currently lying in bed with a fever and in sevear pain waiting for ooh gp to come visit me. Cohen kicked me in the stomach earlier and I have been getting worse since. I was already on antibiotics as my wound had opened and they think I have an infection and now I can’t move I’m in so much pain.
On top of that Cohen was Tongue tied so refused the breast and we had to put him on formula, he throws that all up so I have been expressing and trying nipple shields and loads of skin to skin to try and get him to latch now the tongue tie is sorted. In pain with my tummy so it’s hard to find a position he can’t hurt me in. He still refuses the breast and get really flustered when offered the nipple as he just has not idea what to do with it.
Due to complications after the csection I haven’t bonded with him either so am just like a zombie feeding and changing him when needed. I’m waiting for his parents to come pick him up and take him home. I don’t feel like everything I have gone through and am still going through is worth it. So much stress, pain and crying.
Lilxmax try HiPP organic formula less sicky. I was a bit like this with my first born. Other option is try baby gaviscon in the milk. When your feeling up to it maybe go to some groups that helped me. With neither of my two did I get the overwhelming feeling of love but It does come. I found no one ever mentions the after birth feeling and exhaustion etc. If it keeps up maybe speak to someone. Try resting up get sleep and once your feeling up to it get yourself out And about x
Congratulations CurlyE09, Willow is absolutely gorgeous - what a beautiful baby! We're so glad to hear she arrived safe and well. How has your dog taken to her? He looks smitten!
Lilxamz, we are so sorry you're feeling so low. What happened when you saw the GP? Please try and take things one step at a time; you've had Cohen's tongue tie sorted, which is brilliant. And please know, there is no shame in moving to bottle feeding if you have to - whatever is right for you. And I remember the health visitor telling me about my baby, who used to vomit what looked like her entire feed up every time. Although it looks like it's all coming back up, they will keep some of it down.
For some, that love isn't instant, especially when you go through a traumatic birth. Please do speak to people about how you're feeling (GP, HV, family), just so they can keep an eye on you, and make sure you're not getting baby blues or post natal depression. And please keep talking here. Sending hugs x
Riley, my little girl born 9th of January via elective c-section. Weighed 3.7kg. Feel so bad now, I went into shock and couldn't even look at her or hold her in the theater or for three hours afterwards!
Have been admitted to the hospital again. On antibiotics and pain relief drips they have done quite a few tests to find out how severe the infection is and where it’s spreading.
im high risk for depression so am making a point of talking about how i am feeling to those close to me and midwives and health visitor. Been referred to councillors and other groups that will help.
LisaLeigh she is gorgeous, Don’t beat yourself up I was spaced out with high blood pressure for about 3 hours after my section. Couldn’t hold or look at Cohen he was just screaming the whole time.
Hi LisaLeigh9, congratulations on your baby girl Riley - isn't she lovely, and what a cracking head of hair. Have you healed up now after your section?
Lilxamz, really pleased you're being looked after in hospital - please keep us posted on your treatment. And good for you for talking about stuff - hang in there x
Mental health is a big thing for me and I understand the importance of talking about it. The whole stigma around mental health is bad people shouldnt feel embarrassed to talk about it. If me being open with everyone who asks if I am ok helps just one person talk about their struggles with someone I will be really happy.
They are going to keep me in until Sunday at least, if I still have a temperature it will be longer. They think I have an infection in my womb lining so lots of rest and antibiotics.
Sent Cohen Home with his Dad as we both felt I needed to focus on me and getting better, having the additional stress of trying to feed him and look after him wouldn’t do me any good. Think that means breastfeeding will be off the table when I get home but that’s ok. He is healthy and that’s what matters.
Being bombarded with pictures of him from the husband. Apparently he is not happy Mum isn’t there.
Lil I hope you feel better soon and just keep talk your feeling through. Don't be hard on yourself, being a mum really is hard work & I struggled with my first born. But I love her to pieces and always will!
Im really enjoying this newborn stage this time round, breastfeeding is a success, we are over 6 weeks in and Harrison has just fitted in with our lives with an already toddler. feels much more natural this time around.
ive signed up to a exercise with baby class which I'm looking forward too.
Lil- so glad you are being open about your journey and are getting help along the way. You’re right about the stigma attached to mental health, which is such an unfortunate truth, but It’s slowly changing as more light is being shed on it. I’m a therapist, so deal with such situations on the daily. Stay strong and keep focusing on getting better. Your health (mental and physical) is the most important thing so that you can be the best you for whatever you face. Sending lots of positive vibes your way. 😊
Thanks Curly, still in the hospital, the doctor came round today and said she was happy for me to go home. My temperature is down and I have been making improvements each day. When she left I cried, I realised I was scared about going home and being left to look after Cohen by myself. It turned into an anxiety and I have pretty much been crying and going through all the different solutions in my head all afternoon. I spoke to my husband and the Midwife’s and decided I would stay in another night so I could get my head straight. Also it means I can see the mental health Midwife tomorrow and hopefully She can help me come up with coping mechanisms.
I felt selfish for making that decision but people keep saying I need to focus on me so I get better and then can look after Cohen, so I know it was the right decision.
Lilxamz, we are sending you big ((((hugs)))). How you're feeling reminds me very much of when I had my first.
Today on the forum, we're talking about Dan Osborne's new tattoo of his kids on his thigh. It got us wondering, do you or your partner have any tattoos about your kids? If so, please do come and tell us about them here.
Thanks Danielle, feeling loads better today. I will be going home shortly and they are going to be sending the midwives out to see me tue and wed to make sure I am ok and touch base. Then I have mental health nurse coming to see me thur, she specialises in mother and baby bonding but will do an assessment and refer me to a perinatal mental health nurse to focus on me if that is needed as well.
Feel like I have the support I need and I know that staying the extra night has helped to get my head in the right place.
How is everyone doing ? Cohen is 1 month old today. Can’t beleve how quickly it has flown by. I am still struggling with my recovery as I can’t pick him up or hold him for long. Midwives discharged me from their care two days after I got home even though I had an anxiety attack in the hospital and requested I stay another night. Don’t think they are really trained on how to deal with mental health issues. Health visitor is being amazing though and making sure I am ok.
Had a few bad nights, he really struggles to poo and it seems to take him all day and most of the night. It’s not too much of a problem at the weekend as my husband helps but I didn’t get to sleep until about half 5 this morning as that’s when he had finally settled and was up again at half 8 For the next feed. By the time i had done the top and tail wash, changed and fed him it was 10 and the health visitor was due at 10:30. He woke up for his next feed before she left and hasn’t settled since.
My husband keeps telling me to rest and leave all the house work so I can recover but how am I meant to nap when he does? and Where do I get time to wash and eat or sterilise his bottles?
Lilxmax did you try the hipp organice milk as that helps my LO that and an Ounce of water a day. My LO also has reflux but that’s medicated so doing ok. Routines take time to form and with my first we had no routine for 3 months. I tend to sterilise once in the morning and once at night. Also get a carrier for baby. It be a little easier to get on. I haven’t found a way of sterilising though with a baby in front of you!
Lil it sounds like you really are having a bit of a tough time but it really does get easier! My daughter had poo issues and in the end we were prescribed medicine from the doctors which helped!
Harrison is now 8weeks and 4 days old. He had his vaccinations on Tuesday and was really good bless him. He also had his last lot of blood tests on Wednesday also (hopefully) I'm loving being a mum and hope everyone else is okay too! X
Hey Ladies, I found a really good app called Mush. It helps you to connect to other mums in your local area. You can see people close to you and see the age of their child and a little blurb about them. Then you can message them and meet up if you like. Most mums I have spoken to arrange meet ups at baby groups, at least then you dont feel like you are going alone and know nobody. X
Hi everyone, it's been a while since we've heard from you and we wondering how are you all getting on? Are you getting into routines? Anyone getting sleep? Please do come and let us know how you're doing - we'd love to hear from you.
Hey all, sorry I've been away for ages Lil Ellie-Bethany is 2month and 5days, we've had some problems, the day I went into be started off I had a phone call from social services regarding my cousin to be told she wasn't allowed unsupervised visits with our unborn child which was totally out of the blue, supposedly while in one of her episodes she'd said she wanted to kidnap my healthy baby and cut me up...
So we've been dealing with that , me and baby is fine though we sort of have a routine going on.
Haven't made it upstairs yet though so me and my partner are sleeping separately atm but I know he understands, I'm looking into moving.. My OCD is starting to rear its ugly head though(I use to self harm when I seem to lose control of housework) as I don't seem to be able to get on top of the housework, so going to ask my mum to watch the LO one day this week and blitz me house and have a bath that lasts longer than 15mins.
Ellies been suffering from Grunting baby syndrome so was advised to try her On hipps baby fennel and camomile tea to help her out and I've got to say it's made a massive difference for her. She's a proper chunky monkey now weighing in at 12lbs and 11oz she takes 4-5oz each feed which is every 3hours give or take ten mins. She's starting to gurgle and giggle which is cute as hell. Me and the OH have started having sex again so I've been placed on to the mini pill which I'm not to happy about but uptil now it's working no pe signs so I'll stay on it until I can get an appointment for the coil, cause I don't want another baby as a newborn was a total shock to the system after 16yr I was quite content with sleeping lol 😂
Thankyou Danielle for the toy we have named him chop
Replies
Currently lying in bed with a fever and in sevear pain waiting for ooh gp to come visit me. Cohen kicked me in the stomach earlier and I have been getting worse since. I was already on antibiotics as my wound had opened and they think I have an infection and now I can’t move I’m in so much pain.
On top of that Cohen was Tongue tied so refused the breast and we had to put him on formula, he throws that all up so I have been expressing and trying nipple shields and loads of skin to skin to try and get him to latch now the tongue tie is sorted. In pain with my tummy so it’s hard to find a position he can’t hurt me in. He still refuses the breast and get really flustered when offered the nipple as he just has not idea what to do with it.
Due to complications after the csection I haven’t bonded with him either so am just like a zombie feeding and changing him when needed. I’m waiting for his parents to come pick him up and take him home. I don’t feel like everything I have gone through and am still going through is worth it. So much stress, pain and crying.
Hope noone else feels like this x
Lilxmax try HiPP organic formula less sicky. I was a bit like this with my first born. Other option is try baby gaviscon in the milk. When your feeling up to it maybe go to some groups that helped me. With neither of my two did I get the overwhelming feeling of love but It does come. I found no one ever mentions the after birth feeling and exhaustion etc. If it keeps up maybe speak to someone. Try resting up get sleep and once your feeling up to it get yourself out And about x
Congratulations CurlyE09, Willow is absolutely gorgeous - what a beautiful baby! We're so glad to hear she arrived safe and well. How has your dog taken to her? He looks smitten!
Lilxamz, we are so sorry you're feeling so low. What happened when you saw the GP? Please try and take things one step at a time; you've had Cohen's tongue tie sorted, which is brilliant. And please know, there is no shame in moving to bottle feeding if you have to - whatever is right for you. And I remember the health visitor telling me about my baby, who used to vomit what looked like her entire feed up every time. Although it looks like it's all coming back up, they will keep some of it down.
For some, that love isn't instant, especially when you go through a traumatic birth. Please do speak to people about how you're feeling (GP, HV, family), just so they can keep an eye on you, and make sure you're not getting baby blues or post natal depression. And please keep talking here. Sending hugs x
Riley, my little girl born 9th of January via elective c-section. Weighed 3.7kg.
Feel so bad now, I went into shock and couldn't even look at her or hold her in the theater or for three hours afterwards!
Have been admitted to the hospital again. On antibiotics and pain relief drips they have done quite a few tests to find out how severe the infection is and where it’s spreading.
im high risk for depression so am making a point of talking about how i am feeling to those close to me and midwives and health visitor. Been referred to councillors and other groups that will help.
LisaLeigh she is gorgeous, Don’t beat yourself up I was spaced out with high blood pressure for about 3 hours after my section. Couldn’t hold or look at Cohen he was just screaming the whole time.
Hi LisaLeigh9, congratulations on your baby girl Riley - isn't she lovely, and what a cracking head of hair. Have you healed up now after your section?
Lilxamz, really pleased you're being looked after in hospital - please keep us posted on your treatment. And good for you for talking about stuff - hang in there x
Mental health is a big thing for me and I understand the importance of talking about it. The whole stigma around mental health is bad people shouldnt feel embarrassed to talk about it. If me being open with everyone who asks if I am ok helps just one person talk about their struggles with someone I will be really happy.
They are going to keep me in until Sunday at least, if I still have a temperature it will be longer. They think I have an infection in my womb lining so lots of rest and antibiotics.
Sent Cohen Home with his Dad as we both felt I needed to focus on me and getting better, having the additional stress of trying to feed him and look after him wouldn’t do me any good. Think that means breastfeeding will be off the table when I get home but that’s ok. He is healthy and that’s what matters.
Being bombarded with pictures of him from the husband. Apparently he is not happy Mum isn’t there.
Lil I hope you feel better soon and just keep talk your feeling through. Don't be hard on yourself, being a mum really is hard work & I struggled with my first born. But I love her to pieces and always will!
Im really enjoying this newborn stage this time round, breastfeeding is a success, we are over 6 weeks in and Harrison has just fitted in with our lives with an already toddler. feels much more natural this time around.
ive signed up to a exercise with baby
class which I'm looking forward too.
Lil- so glad you are being open about your journey and are getting help along the way. You’re right about the stigma attached to mental health, which is such an unfortunate truth, but It’s slowly changing as more light is being shed on it. I’m a therapist, so deal with such situations on the daily. Stay strong and keep focusing on getting better. Your health (mental and physical) is the most important thing so that you can be the best you for whatever you face. Sending lots of positive vibes your way. 😊
Thanks Curly, still in the hospital, the doctor came round today and said she was happy for me to go home. My temperature is down and I have been making improvements each day. When she left I cried, I realised I was scared about going home and being left to look after Cohen by myself. It turned into an anxiety and I have pretty much been crying and going through all the different solutions in my head all afternoon. I spoke to my husband and the Midwife’s and decided I would stay in another night so I could get my head straight. Also it means I can see the mental health Midwife tomorrow and hopefully She can help me come up with coping mechanisms.
I felt selfish for making that decision but people keep saying I need to focus on me so I get better and then can look after Cohen, so I know it was the right decision.
A happy Mum makes a happy Baby.
Lilxamz, we are sending you big ((((hugs)))). How you're feeling reminds me very much of when I had my first.
Today on the forum, we're talking about Dan Osborne's new tattoo of his kids on his thigh. It got us wondering, do you or your partner have any tattoos about your kids? If so, please do come and tell us about them here.
Thanks Danielle, feeling loads better today. I will be going home shortly and they are going to be sending the midwives out to see me tue and wed to make sure I am ok and touch base. Then I have mental health nurse coming to see me thur, she specialises in mother and baby bonding but will do an assessment and refer me to a perinatal mental health nurse to focus on me if that is needed as well.
Feel like I have the support I need and I know that staying the extra night has helped to get my head in the right place.
Hi everyone, we wanted to check and see how you're all doing? How are those beautful babies of yours?
How is everyone doing ? Cohen is 1 month old today. Can’t beleve how quickly it has flown by. I am still struggling with my recovery as I can’t pick him up or hold him for long. Midwives discharged me from their care two days after I got home even though I had an anxiety attack in the hospital and requested I stay another night. Don’t think they are really trained on how to deal with mental health issues. Health visitor is being amazing though and making sure I am ok.
Had a few bad nights, he really struggles to poo and it seems to take him all day and most of the night. It’s not too much of a problem at the weekend as my husband helps but I didn’t get to sleep until about half 5 this morning as that’s when he had finally settled and was up again at half 8 For the next feed. By the time i had done the top and tail wash, changed and fed him it was 10 and the health visitor was due at 10:30. He woke up for his next feed before she left and hasn’t settled since.
My husband keeps telling me to rest and leave all the house work so I can recover but how am I meant to nap when he does? and Where do I get time to wash and eat or sterilise his bottles?
Lilxmax did you try the hipp organice milk as that helps my LO that and an Ounce of water a day. My LO also has reflux but that’s medicated so doing ok. Routines take time to form and with my first we had no routine for 3 months. I tend to sterilise once in the morning and once at night. Also get a carrier for baby. It be a little easier to get on. I haven’t found a way of sterilising though with a baby in front of you!
Lil it sounds like you really are having a bit of a tough time
but it really does get easier! My daughter had poo issues and in the end we were prescribed medicine from the doctors which helped!
Harrison is now 8weeks and 4 days old. He had his vaccinations on Tuesday and was really good bless him. He also had his last lot of blood tests on Wednesday also (hopefully) I'm loving being a mum and hope everyone else is okay too! X
Hi everyone, how are you all doing? Have the visitors slowly stopped coming now?
Hey Ladies, I found a really good app called Mush. It helps you to connect to other mums in your local area. You can see people close to you and see the age of their child and a little blurb about them. Then you can message them and meet up if you like. Most mums I have spoken to arrange meet ups at baby groups, at least then you dont feel like you are going alone and know nobody. X
Hi everyone, it's been a while since we've heard from you and we wondering how are you all getting on? Are you getting into routines? Anyone getting sleep? Please do come and let us know how you're doing - we'd love to hear from you.
Hey all, sorry I've been away for ages Lil Ellie-Bethany is 2month and 5days, we've had some problems, the day I went into be started off I had a phone call from social services regarding my cousin to be told she wasn't allowed unsupervised visits with our unborn child which was totally out of the blue, supposedly while in one of her episodes she'd said she wanted to kidnap my healthy baby and cut me up...
So we've been dealing with that , me and baby is fine though we sort of have a routine going on.
Haven't made it upstairs yet though so me and my partner are sleeping separately atm but I know he understands, I'm looking into moving.. My OCD is starting to rear its ugly head though(I use to self harm when I seem to lose control of housework) as I don't seem to be able to get on top of the housework, so going to ask my mum to watch the LO one day this week and blitz me house and have a bath that lasts longer than 15mins.
Ellies been suffering from Grunting baby syndrome so was advised to try her On hipps baby fennel and camomile tea to help her out and I've got to say it's made a massive difference for her. She's a proper chunky monkey now weighing in at 12lbs and 11oz she takes 4-5oz each feed which is every 3hours give or take ten mins. She's starting to gurgle and giggle which is cute as hell. Me and the OH have started having sex again so I've been placed on to the mini pill which I'm not to happy about but uptil now it's working no pe signs so I'll stay on it until I can get an appointment for the coil, cause I don't want another baby as a newborn was a total shock to the system after 16yr I was quite content with sleeping lol 😂
Thankyou Danielle for the toy we have named him chop
