Tell Share Parental Leave how the parenting is shared out in your family: win a £200 voucher

cluckyhen · Apr 2, 2019 7:17AM

Quite simply, none. He is a hard working man who is rarely home as his work takes him away a lot and we knew this from the get go.

Skarletkat · Apr 2, 2019 8:59AM

My husband and I considered shared parental leave however he earns lot more than I do. Additionally, I wanted to breastfeed which would be difficult if not impossible if I returned to work. Even though he works many hours and commutes for over an hour to get to work,he helps a lot! He does all the house chores and sometimes if he wakes up earlier in the morning (or baby wakes him up) he will prepare a meal so that I don't have to cook during the day. In terms of looking after our son, I end up doing more as he is out of the house most days, and at night I want him to sleep as much as possible as he has to go to work. However, during the weekend he is brilliant at keeping our son so that I can meet friends or just chill. He can do everything,like feed him, change his nappy,bath him etc and he loves playing with him. Them two have bonded so much that our son gets so excited when he sees his daddy or even hears his voice on the phone. I am one lucky wife and mum!

EvelynAndJamiesMummy6390 · Apr 2, 2019 12:34PM

I'm taking the full leave as my pay package was better - he would only get SMP and earns more than me. I'm due to return to work in 4 weeks and we've arranged our working hours so that he gets 3 days with our daughter (2 by himself). If I'm totally honest he didn't want to do shared parental leave as he can deal with her better now she's a little older.

I've recently discovered I'm pregnant again so will only be back at work for 6 or 7 months. Next time round we will do exactly the same thing as this time. It works for us.

ThuperRah · Apr 2, 2019 1:26PM

SPL isnt applicable for us as we are both self-employed, but it's a great idea in theory.
As hubby either works away completely or is home things work a little differently for us. Obviously when he's away I do everything but while he's home I'd say he does the lions share of school runs, cooking, cleaning and of course entertaining the small one (16 months), while I spend time with my horses. It works for us 😊

kir1975 · Apr 2, 2019 3:55PM

None! My now ex husband walked out on me and our two children in October 2016.

katieskatie82 · Apr 2, 2019 4:30PM

my partner takes our son for a few hours in the evening for me to have some time to myself. Also takes him to football saturday mornings so i have saturday morning me time! i love it! x

Catherine Deacon · Apr 2, 2019 8:21PM

my husband works to much for this unfortunately

FANNA · Apr 2, 2019 8:47PM

My husband works from home the days I have to be in work early or training late or if kids are ill and I need an extra pair of hands.

mei khimji · Apr 2, 2019 10:26PM

always the ironing, and feeding

southernsun · Apr 3, 2019 10:01AM

We both work full time during the week but evenings and weekends are a team effort and about spending quality time as a family.

kamoc · Apr 3, 2019 11:37AM

In my sister's house her husband is the main child carer and it works out really well for them.

Vhall254 · Apr 3, 2019 7:38PM

We had twins, so dad was hands on from the start, he did everything apart from feeding and would take over the moment he got back from work. He has such an amazing bond with boys it's great to see!

borb12 · Apr 3, 2019 9:19PM

I work during school hours but during the school holidays I'm lucky to be able to fit my shift around my husbands shift (when he does 6am-2pm I work 3pm-8pm). So when I am at work he looks after our DD

MrsFish · Apr 3, 2019 9:56PM

My husband took paternity leave plus several weeks holiday, so we were lucky enough to have around 6 weeks off together. I breast fed until baby was 9 months old, when i had to return to work as my maternity pay had dried up. My husband works shifts, and we have been lucky enough to find a nursery that will take our daughter on a pay as you go basis, so they will take her different days. Generally he has our little girl 2 days a week and she goes to nursery 1 or 2 days a week. We split chores and although I do the washing, he hoovers and cooks a lot. He will also share bath and bed so I can have some time to exercise and take care of myself. I know I am super lucky, many of my mummy friends don’t get as much support from their significant others. My husband loves being so hands on and spending time with our baby, we all have such a strong bond 😊

Farhanac · Apr 4, 2019 1:32AM

Hubby has a great bond with our child and shares the load of nurturing and care

gnashalou83 · Apr 4, 2019 12:56PM

My husband does very little to help with childcare. When our son was a baby I pretty much did everything, but I wasn't working anyway while he worked night shifts so it was fine. Now, however, I am the main income earner and while we both work full time he still does very little to help with childcare. It falls to me to arrange sitters so we can work outside of school hours!

elisabeta · Apr 4, 2019 3:38PM

My husband works full time as i dont work i do most things but when he gets home hes very hands on helps with nappies and bedtimes as its really the only time he gets to see her, he does lots more at the weekend when he gets to play and read to her

Heatherr32 · Apr 4, 2019 5:10PM

My husband is fantastic with our son. He was born in December and we decided to do shared parental leave as we both thought it was the fairest option and both wanted to be as close with our son as possible. We have shared it equally with him taking half of it and me taking half of it. One of us will work for 2 weeks whilst the other is off with our son and then we swap around for the next two weeks and so on. Both of us take care of him during the evenings. We love working it this way as it means neither of us are missing anything and towards the end of the two weeks when you feel as though you need a break it's nice to go back to work and be in the adult world for a couple of weeks. I find doing this really makes me appreciate both time with my little boy and also my time to myself whilst I'm at work. I can't praise my husband enough, he is so hands-on and really couldn't do any more then he does already. He was off when our little boy had his first smile and I received all the pictures and excited texts and it's moments like that that he has with our little boy that are so touching to see.

LongJohnAndy · Apr 4, 2019 7:21PM

Our house has a role-reversal thing going on. My Wife is a Police Officer and works full-time whilst I stay at home. When the children were small my role was full-time Dad but now they're older (9yrs & 6yrs) I'm able to do a bit of work from home too. I'm a carpenter and have a fully equipped workshop in the garden and that allows me to contribute to the household income too.

We discussed our roles when we first got pregnant. I've always been self-employed and with that comes a certain amount of uncertainty in terms of income. Nothing is guaranteed. When you have no responsibilities a flexible income is not really a drama but when little fellas come along it's important to be able to budget and plan ahead, so we took the joint decision to swap roles as that allowed us to keep a good income but also ensured the children spent their time with us (or vice versa)

Life took a bit of a turn a couple of years ago when I had to have my right leg amputated above the knee following an accident. My Wife managed to take time away from work to help with my rehabilitation but has since returned to her career. I'm now up and about and life continues unabated. The kids are happy, the parents are happy and life is good. It could be better (obviously) but you cope with the cards you're dealt. Being at home has allowed me to develop as a husband and as a Father. Our children love the arrangement we have and it works well for us.

I'm not going to preach, everyone's circumstance is different, but so long as the children come first, it's all good.

Amandajg · Apr 4, 2019 9:03PM

My husband and I took SPL. I stayed home for the statutory 2 weeks after an emergency c section whilst he was on paternity leave then he has taken the remaining 50 weeks as SPL so i could go back to work full time. He does everything for our boy and their bond is amazing to see. He struggled at the start no more than a new mum and has just been amazing. I often get asked if i feel like i have missed out because its my husband at home and not me but he is happy and healthy and being well looked after so i dont see there is any benefit to it being me at home rather than my husband. It has to be a choice of what works for each individual family and thats where SPL is great as if that wasnt an option we would have chosen no to have any children at all. My boy isnt missing out on anything being with my husband instead of me, hes thriving as he should be at 11 months.

Tell Share Parental Leave how the parenting is shared out in your family: win a £200 voucher

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